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Sails, skis and snowboards

Several gay and lesbian winter trips and parties planned in major cities

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Royal Caribbean’s Allure of the Seas goes gay this weekend. (Photo courtesy Fifteen Minutes PR)

From gay ski weeks to gay rodeos, some of the most popular LGBT events happen during the winter. Whether your tastes lean toward the more laid back affair, such as a romantic dinner for two, or if you are a social butterfly looking to be surrounded by thousands of gay counterparts, here are some must-do events that are happening throughout the remaining winter season:

Elevation Utah 2012

Rated as the No. 1 ski destination by Ski Magazine, Park City, Utah, presents its second annual Gay Ski Week Feb. 23-26. According to founder Tom Whitman, “Unlike some of the other ski weeks, the Elevation events are geared to be friendly and open and fun, not really geared toward VIP velvet ropes.” Although these events are described as laid-back, the DJ line-up is quite impressive. World-class DJs such as Roland Belmares, Josh Peace and Pornstar will spin. “Daytime activities are usually taken up by skiing and snowboarding, while the official events happen at après-ski time,” Whitman says. The welcome event is held Feb. 23, and culminates in a series of evening parties at venues such as Downstairs, Sidecar, and Jam Salt Lake City. Purchase tickets and get discounted hotel rates at utahgayski.com.

Telluride Gay Ski Week

Can’t get enough of Elevation Utah? Hop over to its neighboring state Colorado where the city of Telluride presents its own Gay Ski Week, Feb. 25 through March 3. This weeklong event is produced by StraightOut Media & Marketing and supports the Telluride AIDS Benefit. Activities include Nuclia’s Get Wasted Party, the annual White Night party, and the first ever “Wig Run,” where everyone from locals to gay skiers can celebrate the week by skiing in their best wig creation. The guest list will be jumping, as three “A-Listers” from Logo TV will be in attendance, including Reichen Lehmkuhl, Chase Hutchison and Levi Crocker. To top the week off, the resort will be celebrating the repeal of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” by allowing active members of the military to party for free the entire week and receive military discounts from lift tickets to rentals all over town. Purchase tickets and weekly passes at telluridegayskiweek.com.

Royal Caribbean’s Allure of the Seas

Set sail with the world’s largest cruise ship and surround yourself with 5,400 like-minded gay travelers. Royal Caribbean’s Allure of the Sea departs Sunday and cruises to the Mexican cities of Cozumel, Costa Maya and Hispanolia and returns after an indulgent seven days on Feb. 5. The LGBT vacation company Atlantis Events, Inc. brings you attractions such as five architectural dance floors, 13 restaurants and cafes, a plethora of theaters presenting performances such as “Chicago” and Dixie Longate’s “Tupperware” show, and adventuresome activities such as rock climbing, zip lining and ice skating. At the western Caribbean ports, you can take part in island excursions such as diving, snorkeling, exploring Mayan ruins or kicking back on the powder-white sand beaches. Broadway diva Idina Menzel and gay comedian Bruce Vilanch will appear. Go to atlantisevents.com for details.

Arizona Gay Rodeo

Looking for something low-key with warm weather, surrounded by dozens of gay cowboys? Visit the Rawhide at WildHorse Pass during Presidents Day weekend (Feb. 17-19) located in Chandler, Ariz. This is the kick-off Rodeo of 2012 hosted by the 25-year-old Arizona Gay Rodeo Association (AGRA). Experience events such as bull riding, roping challenges, speed events on horseback and the Wild Drag Race. Located only 17 miles from the city of Phoenix, you can end your day at one of the popular gay pubs in the capitol, such as Charlie’s Phoenix, Kobalt or Apollo’s Lounge, which offer specials during rodeo weekend. Visit agra-phx.com to purchase tickets and to obtain a discount code at the Radisson Hotel Phoenix-Chandler. For an affordable $25 weekend pass to all Rodeo events, gay cowboy heaven is only a Stetson away.

LGBT Winter Weekend in NYC

Taking a trip to New York City is always a blast, but now various Travel Alternatives Group (TAG) approved hotels offer an even greater incentive for a weekend trip to the city. Visit the Danfords Hotel & Marina Feb. 24 through March 31 and purchase the “Romance” package for two, starting at $429, which includes a one-night accommodation, Champagne and strawberries upon arrival, a 50-minute side-by-side couples massage at Blue Sapphire Spa and $100 credit toward the Wave Seafood Kitchen. The Garden City Hotel, also located in Long Island, is offering the “All for Love” couple’s retreat ($399). Included are overnight deluxe accommodations, chocolate-covered strawberries and a three-course Valentine’s dinner for two in the private dining room of the hotel’s signature restaurant, Rein. Prefer to stay on the island of Manhattan? Enter the promo code, GLBT11 for up to 20 percent off the best available rate at the Hilton New York (newyork.hilton.com).

Winter Party Miami

Surround yourself with miles of white sandy beaches, thousands of men in Speedos and the bumping base of music spun by legendary DJs such as DJ Joe Gauthreaux. The expected attendance of 10,000 LGBT partiers will benefit the National Gay & Lesbian Task Force through each event and ticket purchased at the Winter Party. Heavily anticipated events include the Under One Sun Pool Party, Boiling Point (Sunday night dance party at Cameo nightclub), and Heaven & Hell at the Pool. Women can experience girls-only events at The Tudor House, which will host the Sunday Brunch party March 4, as well as dance parties at The Stage and Trio on the Bay. The Surfcomber Miami is the official hotel for the Winter Party and will host the welcome event Spark on Feb. 29 as well as being the location of the two pool parties. Tickets and weekly passes to the events can be purchased at winterparty.com.

Vallarta Girl

A chance to experience a five-day lesbian party in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico is worth the last minute splurge. The “Vallarta Girl” event is in its second year and takes place Feb. 16-20. Daily events include lesbian cruises, jungle excursions and night parties with world-class DJs. Celebrities such as Rose and Whitney from “The Real L World” will be in attendance as well as well-known artists, DJ Lezlee and DJ Saratonin. A popular gay-friendly destination, Puerto Vallarta offers a selection of women-only bars, such as CC, The Palms and Mañana. Purchase tickets and receive a discount fare from Alaska Airlines at vallartagirl.com.

Gay Mardi Gras, New Orleans

Famous for its huge Carnival celebrations, rowdy Bourbon Street crowds and inspirations from the French, Spanish and Native American cultures, Mardi Gras is one of the most anticipated annual celebrations in America. Thankfully, the “Fat Tuesday” festival offers a variety of LGBT events to celebrate our own Gay Mardi Gras. For example, The Mardi Gras Bourbon Awards has been an annual costume event for more than 40 years, where contestants can win awards in categories such as Best Drag, Best Leather, or Best of Show. This event will be held on Feb. 21. Other events include the Krewe Balls and Mardi Gras Bead Toss. Check out these after-party gay bars: Bourbon Pub, Café Lafitte, and Le Roundup.

Whistler Winter Pride

Not just another winter ski trip, Whistler presents an entire week of activities much like the summer Prides that take place across the U.S. From Feb. 5-12, Whistler Ski Resort in British Columbia, Canada organizes daily activities, ski trips and après-ski parties to keep you busy. For example, daytime activities include ski and snowboard lessons, snowmobile tours, inner tubing in the Coca-Cola Tube Park, dog sledding, zip lining and skeleton sliding. Evening activities include captivating events such as the Gender Bender Drag Ball at Garfinkles nightclub, a Ho Down at the Echo Valley Ranch & Spa, and a comedy night hosted by Vancouver’s Drag Diva, Symone Says. Women don’t get left behind, as there are special events just for the girls, such as the Burlesque show, starring Burgundy Brixx and the closing party, Shred Betties Bash. Tickets can be purchased for all events at gaywhistler.com/events.

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Real Estate

The rise of virtual home tours

Adapting to changing consumer preferences in spring real estate

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Looking for a home? Virtual tours hold special benefits for queer buyers.

In today’s dynamic real estate market, the spring season brings not only blooming flowers but also a surge of activity as buyers and sellers alike prepare to make their moves. However, in recent years, there’s been a notable shift in how consumers prefer to explore potential homes: the rise of virtual tours. 

For the LGBTQ community, these virtual experiences offer more than just convenience; they provide accessibility, safety, and inclusivity in the home buying process. 

Gone are the days of spending weekends driving from one open house to another – unless that’s your thing of course, only to find that the property doesn’t quite match expectations. With virtual tours, you can explore every corner of a home from the comfort of your own space – find something interesting? Schedule a showing with any LGBTQ Realtor at GayRealEstate.com.

This is particularly significant for LGBTQ individuals, who may face unique challenges or concerns when attending in-person showings. Whether it’s the ability to discreetly view properties without fear of discrimination or the convenience of touring homes located in LGBTQ-friendly neighborhoods across the country, virtual tours offer a sense of empowerment and control in the home buying process.

Moreover, virtual tours cater to the diverse needs of the LGBTQ community. For couples or families with busy schedules or those living in different cities or states, these digital walkthroughs provide a convenient way to view properties together without the need for extensive travel. Additionally, for individuals who may be exploring their gender identity or transitioning, virtual tours offer a low-pressure environment to explore potential living spaces without the added stress of in-person interactions.

At GayRealEstate.com, we understand the importance of adapting to changing consumer preferences and leveraging technology to better serve our community. That’s why our agents offer an extensive selection of virtual tours for LGBTQ individuals and allies alike – visit our website, choose an agent and within minutes you’ll have access to the Multiple Listing Service (MLS) via their website.

From cozy condominiums in bustling urban centers to sprawling estates in picturesque suburbs, virtual tours showcase a wide range of properties tailored to diverse tastes and lifestyles.

In addition to virtual tours, GayRealEstate.com provides comprehensive resources and support to guide LGBTQ buyers and sellers through every step of the real estate journey. Our network of LGBTQ-friendly agents is committed to providing personalized service, advocacy, and representation to ensure that all individuals feel respected, valued, and empowered throughout the process. Plus, we are happy to provide a free relocation kit to any city in the USA or Canada if you are a home buyer.

As we embrace the spring season and all the opportunities it brings in the real estate market, let’s also celebrate the power of virtual tours to revolutionize the way we find and experience our future homes. Whether you’re searching for your first apartment, forever home, or investment property, GayRealEstate.com is here to help you navigate the exciting world of real estate with confidence, pride, and inclusivity.

Jeff Hammerberg is founding CEO of Hammerberg & Associates, Inc. Reach him at [email protected].

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Advice

Should I divorce my husband for the hot new guy in our building?

Debating whether to leave or stay after the sex goes cold

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Dear Michael,

I’ve been with my husband for 10 years and the sex is pretty much gone. It stopped being exciting a long time ago and pretty much the only time we ever do it is with the occasional third.

A really hot guy moved into our building about a year ago. We would see each other sometimes in the elevator or at our building’s gym and we started talking and really hit it off. Mark is 15 years younger than I but we seem to have a lot in common. We started hooking up and the sex is amazing.

I haven’t told my husband because it’s breaking our rule about no repeats. I have to say that the secrecy is hot. It’s kind of a thrill to take the elevator upstairs when I say I’m going on an errand. But it’s more than that. I have a connection with Mark that is far more amazing than what I have ever felt with my husband. Not just the sex. We just enjoy being together, talking about anything and everything.

My husband went to visit his family last weekend and I spent the whole time with Mark. Since then I can’t stop thinking that I want to leave my husband and be with Mark.

Part of me thinks this is a crazy mid-life crisis. I mean, this kid’s in a totally different place in life. But we have mind-blowing sex and a fantastic connection. I’d like your thoughts on how to proceed.

Michael replies: 

You’ve got a lot to consider.

First: Sex with a long-term partner changes over time. It tends to be less about erotic heat and more about the connection with a person whom you love. In other words, it’s being with the person you’re with that makes the sex meaningful and even great. Having a good sexual relationship with a long-term partner comes far more from a heart connection than from a crotch attachment.  

Second: You seem ready to throw your relationship under the bus pretty quickly, without addressing other problems in the relationship besides sex. When you are sneaking around, lying, and rule-breaking , I don’t see how you can look your husband in the eye; and if you can’t look him in the eye, you certainly can’t have even a half-way decent relationship.

Yet another point to consider: Affairs pretty much always seem more exciting than marriage. The partner is new, which almost automatically makes the sex hotter; the secrecy is a thrill; and you don’t have to deal with paying the rent, house chores, and all the petty annoyances of living up-close with someone day-in, day-out.  

You are bringing lots of energy to your affair, and everything about it is exciting. You are bringing no energy — at least no positive energy — to your marriage. You get what you put into a relationship.

Divorce is not something that should be entered into lightly. Be aware that if you leave your husband for Mark, you will no doubt find over time that the sex becomes less exciting and that the connection is not always fantastic. No surprise, 75 percent of marriages that begin with affair partners end in divorce. While I don’t think statistics predict what will happen to any particular couple, believing that you will have a significantly better relationship with your affair partner than you did with your husband sets you up for likely disappointment.

Many gay men focus on “hot sex” as the big draw, pursuing a lot of sex with a lot of men, and/or pursuing an ongoing series of relationships that last until the sex cools. If that’s what you want, that’s fine. But it’s a different path from pursuing a close and loving long-term relationship, which involves knowing someone well and having him know you well; collaborating on getting through the hard stuff life throws at us; finding ways to make peace with disappointment; and consistently striving to be someone worth being married to. 

How to proceed? While you are the only person who should make that decision, I would suggest that whatever your choice, keep in mind that marriage can be more than what you’ve made of it, so far.

Michael Radkowsky, Psy.D. is a licensed psychologist who works with couples and individuals in D.C. He can be found online at michaelradkowsky.com. All identifying information has been changed for reasons of confidentiality. Have a question? Send it to [email protected].

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Autos

Sport haulers: Jeep Grand Cherokee, Mercedes GLE-Class

Updated cabins, adept handling, and more

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Jeep Grand Cherokee

Now that March Madness and the Masters are over, it’s time for, well, everything else. For my husband and me, this means water sports, as in kayaks and rowing sculls, which is why we trekked to the Potomac for the George Washington Invitational regatta last weekend. 

Alas, high winds splashed cold water on the event, canceling much of it. But there was still plenty of spirited camaraderie to rival “The Boys in the Boat.” 

And I was reminded of my time years ago as a rower with D.C. Strokes, ferrying teammates to races up and down the East Coast. Back then my ride was a dated, rather cramped four-door sedan. 

If only we could have paddled around in a sporty SUV like the two reviewed here. Now that would have been some smooth sailing (wink-wink). 

JEEP GRAND CHEROKEE 

$40,000

MPG: 19 city/26 highway

0 to 60 mph: 7.5 seconds

Maximum cargo room: 37.7 cu. ft. 

PROS: Updated cabin, adept handling, strong towing 

CONS: So-so gas mileage, no third row, pricey trim levels

IN A NUTSHELL: Rough, tough and buff. It’s doesn’t get much more butch than a Jeep. This year’s Grand Cherokee is no exception, with rugged looks, expert off-road capability and better-than-average towing capacity of 6,200 pounds. 

There are a dizzying number of trim levels—more than a dozen—starting with the barebones base-model Laredo at an affordable $40,000. The lineup tops out with the Summit Reserve 4xe PHEV, which is almost twice the price at $76,000 and one of various plug-in hybrid versions available. Those plug-in hybrids can drive up to 25 miles on all-electric power before the four-cylinder gas engine kicks in. Otherwise, you can choose from a standard V6 or V8. Gas mileage on all trim levels is basically the same as the competition. 

Where the Grand Cherokee really shines is in the handling. More refined than a Wrangler but less lavish than a Land Rover, this Jeep maneuvers just as well on city streets and highways as it does on bumpier terrain.    

I tested the mid-range and mid-priced Overland, which comes standard with four-wheel drive and large 20-inch wheels. It also boasts a slew of niceties, such as quilted upholstery, panoramic sunroof and high-tech digital displays. These include a 10.25-inch infotainment touchscreen and rear-seat entertainment system. 

The nine-speaker Alpine stereo, designed specifically for the Grand Cherokee, is pleasing. But I really wanted to hear the boffo 19-speaker McIntosh surround-sound system that Jeep also offers. Sigh, it’s only available on the premium Summit trim level. 

MERCEDES GLE-CLASS

$64,000 

MPG: 20 city/25 highway

0 to 60 mph: 6.6 seconds

Maximum cargo room: 33.3 cu. ft. 

PROS: Lush interior, silky-smooth suspension, speedy 

CONS: Some confusing electronics, tight third row, many competitors

IN A NUTSHELL: For a more high-class hauler, there’s the Mercedes GLE-Class. This midsize SUV is similar in size to the Jeep Grand Cherokee. But instead of seating five passengers, the GLE can carry up to seven. Sure, legroom in the optional third row may be tight for taller travelers, but it’s perfect for a cocky cockswain or two. 

Six trim levels, ranging from the base-model GLE 350 to two high-performance AMG models. For eco-conscious buyers, the GLE 450e plug-in hybrid arrived earlier this year and can run on battery power alone for almost 60 miles. 

My test car was the top-of-the-line AMG 63 S 4Matic, a head-turner in every way. Priced at a whopping $127,000, this GLE looks best in glossy black with the Night Package, which includes tasteful jet-black exterior accents and matte-black wheels. To complete the Darth Vader effect, there’s a deep, menacing exhaust rumble that’s downright threatening.

You expect such a ride to be wicked fast, and it is: 0 to 60 mph in a blistering 3.7 seconds. Yet the carbon ceramic brakes with their devil-red calipers are equally impressive in slowing things down quickly. 

Inside, each GLE comes with two large digital displays on the elegantly sculpted dashboard. My favorite feature is the “Hey Mercedes” digital assistant, which responds to voice commands such as opening or closing the sunroof, operating the infotainment system or activating the climate controls. 

It’s hard to find sport seats that are more comfortable, especially with the heavenly massage function (though those massage controls could be a bit more user-friendly.) For AMG models, the seats come with red-contrasting stitching and red seatbelts—a nod to the devilish demeanor under the hood.

Considering all the SUVs available in showrooms, few make quite the splash of a GLE.

Mercedes GLE-Class
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