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Gay advice columnist has new MTV sex show

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Dan Savage chats with a young gay University of Maryland student about his sex life in an early episode of ‘Savage U,’ a new MTV sex advice show. (Photo courtesy MTV)

 

The Blade caught up with Dan Savage last week — he’s plugging his new MTV show “Savage U” (Tuesdays at 11 p.m.) and took a few minutes out of a dizzying schedule of writing advice columns, editing newspapers, hosting the new show and being an anti-bullying advocate — in addition to being a family man — to riff on this and that.

BLADE: There’ve been so many cable sex advice shows over the years — the old MSNBC shows, Sue Johanson and even MTV’s own “Loveline” with Dr. Drew and Adam for those of us old enough to remember it. What can yours add that hasn’t been done before or does every generation need its own sex advice show?

SAVAGE: Hopefully what I bring to it is what I bring to “Savage Love” (his syndicated advice columnist which runs locally in City Paper) — a sex-positive, kink-positive take and one that embraces pleasure as a legitimate goal that celebrates people’s desire. A lot of what I’ve seen is really kind of sex negative that starts first with no, then with maybe. “Savage Love” works its way from maybe to yes to yes, definitely … there’s a school of thinking that says, “Oh my God, you can’t have sex if there’s any risk,” but there’s risk in all kinds of things. What needs to be discussed is how to mitigate the risk as much as possible but then at a certain point yes, you have a right to go for it. You also have to be able to shoulder the consequences. … There’s always a risk but you don’t hear people advocating against sky diving or snowboarding. There’s a whole bunch of people who will drop dead today from eating chicken salad and yeah, you’d be an idiot to leave it out in the sun for three days and then eat it, so we can apply that same brainy shit to sex.

BLADE: How do you get these college students to go on the air and say, “I have herpes” or “I’m a virgin.” Are you involved in finding them or do producers do that?

SAVAGE: There are producers who do that ahead of time. I need to be hearing about their stories for the first time when we film, so there are layers of producers who vet them ahead of time. There are a lot of old farts like me who think YouTube and Facebook and Twitter and all that is something new and always will be, but for somebody who’s 19 and basically grew up with this stuff, they have different attitudes about privacy … we’ve started some taping and then stopped ….

BLADE: Why? What would be an example of someone whose story shouldn’t be aired?

SAVAGE: This was someone who obviously had a deeper-seated medical issue that became evident on camera and we felt talking about the issue would have unfairly outed the person and would have been kind of dishonest so we unplugged the mics … we try to be honest and honor the kids without exploiting anyone.

BLADE: You seem so much nicer on the show than in your column where you often seem very exasperated and caustic. Why?

SAVAGE: Well I told someone in the premiere episode they were an idiot so I’m a little caustic here and there on the show but I think in the column, some of it is having to boil so much down to fit the space that it can make me seem more caustic and sarcastic than I am. I’ve had people say for the podcast I seem so much nicer but that’s the benefit of being able to run my mouth. It’s a different venue … also on the show, I’m a lot more willing to cut these kids some slack because they’re 18. I’m a lot more patient with an 18-year-old fuck up than I am with a 38-year-old fuck up. It’s like of course you’re fucked up when you’re 18 because 18 is fucked up anyway.

BLADE: Are you of the school of thought that a Santorum nomination would have been better for Obama than a Romney nomination or does any Santorum success cause you to shudder?

SAVAGE: I agree with Bill Maher on that — I don’t trust the American people enough to have (had) Santorum be the nominee. This is a country that elected Bush, at least once, he stole it the first time, but I would take Romney over Santorum though they’re two bars set so low they’re basically on the floor.

BLADE: What is the most pressing sex question you see from gay men?

SAVAGE: Male fear of intimacy is real and so it’s doubled with gay men. That comes up a lot. I also hear from young gay guys, like 15, 16, 17, 18 who say there’s no one for them to date. Their straight peers have been dating since the middle school dances but they’ve been alone or they say there are only older gay guys to date and I tell them dating starts later a lot of times for us so they don’t have a lot of options. Also monogamy comes up a lot. Gay guys are also guys so often it becomes an issue of non-monogamous relationships that are grounded in trust and disclosure rather than lying and cheating and running around.

BLADE: How do you have time to add a show to your busy schedule?

SAVAGE: Terry is a stay-at-home dad — that hetero-normative model of having a stay-at-home wife, that shit is awesome if you can afford it. We’re lucky in that regard.

 

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Theater

‘The Inheritance’ is most-nominated at this year’s Helen Hayes Awards

42nd annual celebration of excellence in local theater set for May 18

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Jamar Jones (bottom left), David Gow, Hunter Ringsmith, Jonathan Atkinson, and Floyd Thomas in ‘The Inheritance, Parts One and Two.’ (Photo by Margot Schulman) 

Helen Hayes Awards 2026
May 18, 2026
For tickets go to theatrewashington.org

Last year, when out director Tom Story took on the daunting task of directing Round House Theatre’s production of “The Inheritance, Parts One and Two,” he knew that casting would be important, maybe even paramount, to the endeavor’s success. So, Story didn’t mess around.

Penned by queer playwright Matthew López, “The Inheritance” (inspired by E.M. Forster’s 1910 novel “Howards End”) is based on gay culture in the wake of the AIDS crisis. 

Story looked at actors he knew, and some he didn’t. He wanted low drama and maybe players who could relate to the LGBTQ experience. In the end, the production’s 13-person cast was entirely queer except for brilliant local favorite Nancy Robinette as Margaret, the wise housekeeper.

Clearly, Story’s vision resonated with audiences. Round House’s production of “The Inheritance” is the most-nominated work of this year’s Helen Hayes Awards, earning 14 nominations. It’s also one of Round House’s highest grossing popular successes ever.

The queer cast members whose ages ranged from about 22 to 60, worked hard and enjoyed the process, and along the way garnered an Outstanding Ensemble in a Play (Hayes) nomination for their efforts. 

The ensemble included Jamar Jones as Tristan, a brilliant doctor who leaves New York for Canada after deciding there’s no place for a gay, HIV-positive Black man in America. For the experienced actor, being part of “The Inheritance” was profound: “I think it was a divinely orchestrated production.”  

He adds “I really feel that it’s so rare that you get to work on a show of that magnitude…size, time, where virtual strangers genuinely fell into rhythm. We became a cohort. I never felt a sense of unease, or reluctance to try things. I could be as big or bold as I wanted to be; or I could be small. Fail, mess up, try again. I didn’t feel judged.”

Jones considers Richmond his home, but says “I’m based where the work is.” Currently, he’s back at Round House rehearsing “Sally & Tom” (May 27-June28), a play within a play/meta exploration of the relationship between Thomas Jefferson and Sally Hemings by Suzan-Lori Parks. 

Jones plays both a contemporary violinist and an enslaved fiddler, parts that have required him to learn to “air fiddle.” He’s all over it: “I want to represent the art and to be as precise as possible. Taught by an instructor, I’ve made strides with movement of the bow; next up is finger placement.” 

Will he leave the play a violinist? “I’ll report back on closing night. Maybe I will have added something to the special skills list on my resume.”

For about a decade, Jones worked in living history, interpreting, performing, and writing pieces about the enslaved people of Colonial Virginia. Among the many historical characters he portrayed was Jupiter (Thomas Jefferson’s longtime enslaved manservant), an experience that’s proved a connection and preparation for his current role.   

The 42nd Helen Hayes Awards celebration recognizing excellence in professional theater in the DMV will be held on Monday, May 18, 2026 at The Anthem on the District Wharf in Washington, D.C. Named for Helen Hayes, the legendary first lady of Broadway, the program consists of the awards presentation hosted by Felicia Curry, Awa Sal Secka, and Derrick Truby, followed by an after-party at nearby Whitlow’s. 

With works selected from 149 eligible productions presented in the 2025 calendar year, nominations were made in 41 categories and grouped as either “Helen” (non-Equity/small Equity presence) or “Hayes” (Equity-heavy).

The many nominations are the result of 49 vetted judges considering 1,997 pieces of work, such as design, direction, choreography, performances, and more. The productions under consideration included 42 musicals, 107 plays, and 33 world premieres.

The following are more of this year’s queer nominees. 

A past Helen Hayes Award recipient and nominee, Fran Tapia is competing against herself this year in the Outstanding Lead Performer in a Musical (Helen) category. Nominated for her memorable turn as the diva barkeep in GALA Theatre’s “Columbia Heights Bolero Bar,” an immersive musical centered on songs of longing and immigration set in a diverse neighborhood on the eve of a divisive presidential election

“It was a challenging time, because a lot of what was happening in the show was happening in the neighborhood,” says Tapia who lives in Columbia Heights just eight minutes from GALA. 

Based in D.C. since 2019, Tapia says “Being recognized in a country that is not my homeland but where I’m building my artistic home, is deeply meaningful. And the variety of roles I have been able to play speaks to the richness of DC theater and the collaborators who trusted me with these roles.”

Her other individual nomination is for the title role in Spooky Action Theater’s “Professor Woland’s Black Magic Rock Show,” a passionately comedic political satire. She approached the mysterious central character as nonbinary. 

Tapia (“Chilean, Latina, queer and proud immigrant”) says while very different, both performances involved particularly strong characters. She’s grateful audiences responded positively to her work. 

Stanley Bahorek, who moved to D.C. with his husband four years ago, is best known as an accomplished actor with a long list of Broadway and regional credits (including playing Carl, the gay son in Studio Theatre’s recent production of “The Mother Play”). Now, he is nominated for Outstanding Music Direction (Helen) for his work on “A Strange Loop,” a production of D.C.’s Visionaries of the Creative Arts (VOCA) in collaboration with Deaf Austin Theatre. He shares this nomination with Walter “Bobby” McCoy.

Michael R. Jackson’s Tony and Pulitzer wining play “A Strange Loop,” is the story of Usher, a Black, queer theater usher trying to write a musical.  VOCA’s take on the work is seen through a deaf BIPOC lens with a deaf Usher played by a deaf actor (out actor Gabriel Silva). Invited by director and longtime friend Alexandria Wailes (who is deaf), Bahorek (who is hearing) joined the creative team as a sort of hybrid associate director/ music supervisor. 

“I’m fluent in conversational American Sign Language (ASL),” he says. “I sort of functioned as a sherpa between the hearing and deaf and hard-of-hearing creatives. It’s been a great thrill to be a part of VOCA’s biggest production to date.” 

If he and McCoy take home the prize, who makes the acceptance speech? Bahorek takes a beat before replying “That’s something we still need to talk about. And soon.” 

A full list of award recipients will be available at theatrewashington.org on Tuesday, May 19, 2026. 

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Out & About

DC Black Pride is around the corner

Anthony Oakes hosts comedy show on Thursday

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Comedian Anthony Oakes (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

Anthony Oakes will host “DC Black Pride Comedy Show” on Thursday, May 21 at 7 p.m.

Oakes will workshop his new hour about addiction, incarceration, recovery, and redemption with special guests.

This event will be hosted by the hilarious Apple Brown Betty with TJ So Silly, Howl Cooper, and featuring Patrice Deveaux. DJ Art.is will be spinning on the 1’s & 2’s. Libations will be provided by Drink Alchy. Images by RGF ENT. Tickets are $28.52 and can be purchased on Eventbrite

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Out & About

United Night Out set for Saturday

Team DC hosts evening of soccer, Pride, music, drag and community

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A scene from the 2023 United Night Out. This year’s event will be held on Saturday. (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

On Saturday, May 16, Team DC is taking over Audi Field for United Night OUT as D.C. United faces St. Louis SC.

Come out for an evening of soccer, Pride, music, drag, and community. The night kicks off with pre-game fun featuring DC Different Drummers, DJ Heat, and a Pride Night OUT Party at the Heineken Rooftop. Then get ready for a 7:30 p.m. match, including the National Anthem sung by Dana Nearing and a halftime drag performance.

After the match, the celebration continues at the Post-Game Rooftop Party with DJ Heat and the After Party at Dacha Navy Yard. Game tickets and after party tickets are available now through Zeffy. After party tickets are $20 and include one drink. 

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