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Hospital apologizes for ‘delay’ in allowing visit by lesbian partner

Women file discrimination complaint against Washington Adventist Hospital

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Washington Adventist Hospital (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

The president of the Takoma Park, Md., based Washington Adventist Hospital has apologized for what she says was a “miscommunication” that led to a delay by the hospital in allowing a woman to visit her same-sex partner following the partner’s admission to the emergency room.

But hospital president Joyce Newmyer disputes claims by the two women and the Human Rights Campaign that an initial denial of a request to visit the partner was due to discrimination. Instead, she says it was based entirely on a policy of barring anyone from visiting emergency room patients undergoing initial treatment and evaluation.

Newmeyer’s assessment of the matter is at odds with an account by Takoma Park residents Kathryn Wilderotter and Linda Cole, who have been partners for eleven years and were legally married in Canada in 2004.

The Human Rights Campaign, a national LGBT advocacy group, released a statement saying a hospital staff member declined to allow Cole to visit Wilderotter shortly after Wilderotter was taken by ambulance on Nov.13, 2011 to the hospital’s emergency room because Cole “was reportedly not recognized as a family member.”

Wilderotter told the Blade she suffered a seizure while driving her car, resulting in a crash that led to an injury. She said a female staff member sitting at the front desk at the emergency room entrance declined to allow Cole to visit Wilderotter after Cole told the woman she was Wilderotter’s partner and spouse.

According to Wilderotter, Cole called Wilderotter’s sister, Kristin Biggs, who arrived at the hospital about 20 minutes later. When Biggs approached the same emergency room staff member she introduced herself as Wilderotter’s sister, Wilderotter told the Blade.

The female staff member then replied, “Oh, we have family here now. You can go in,” Wilderotter quoted her partner as informing her.

HRC announced in its Jan. 19 statement that Cole and Wilderotter have filed separate complaints of discrimination over the incident with a joint federal commission that regulates hospitals and the Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services, an arm of the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services.

“Discrimination during a medical emergency may be one of the worst forms of discrimination LGBT people face,” said HRC President Joe Solmonese. “Recognizing this problem, federal regulations were put in place to end discrimination in healthcare settings and allow all people to be with their loved ones during their most critical moments.”

Solmonese was referring to the implementation in January 2011 of new federal regulations initiated by the Obama administration that require all hospitals participating in Medicaid and Medicare programs to allow patients to designate the persons they wish to see as visitors. The regulations prohibit discrimination in hospital visitation based on sexual orientation and gender identity among other categories.

Since nearly every U.S. hospital participates in Medicaid or Medicare programs the new regulations are said to apply to nearly all hospitals in the country, including Washington Adventist Hospital.

Meanwhile, HRC said in its statement that Washington Adventist Hospital has not responded to its annual survey of healthcare providers, which it uses to publish the HRC Healthcare Equality Index. The index assesses and discloses the policies and practices of hospitals related to LGBT patients and their families.

Newmyer told the Blade on Monday that she didn’t know why the hospital hasn’t returned the HRC survey in past years but said hospital officials were currently working on it and would be sending it to HRC shortly.

In a phone interview with the Blade on Monday, Wilderotter said a hospital executive called the couple six weeks later to say the incident was caused by a new employee unfamiliar with hospital policies and that the hospital apologized for what happened.

Newmyer posted a statement on the hospital website on Jan. 20 saying she was troubled over news media stories reporting the initial denial of visitation was due to discrimination.

“First, I want to express my deepest apologies to Ms. Wilderotter and Ms. Cole for feeling anything less than valued at our hospital,” she said in the statement. “As a policy and a practice, our hospital does not discriminate against anyone regardless of their race, ethnicity, faith, sexual orientation or ability to pay,” she said.

Newmyer told the Blade on Monday that a hospital investigation into the incident shows that a “perfect storm” of miscommunication and coincidence may have led Cole and Wilderotter to believe they were singled out for discrimination.

According to Newmyer, when Cole arrived at the hospital doctors and emergency room attendants were treating Wilderotter and evaluating her condition. She said the hospital has a policy that prohibits anyone from visiting an emergency room patient at this “critical” stage of treatment.

She could not determine exactly what the hospital staff person told Cole at this time, Newmyer said, but she is certain that the denial of the visit would have been issued to anyone arriving at that time. In what she called an unfortunate coincidence, Newmyer said the attending doctors and staff completed their initial evaluation of Wilderotter and cleared her to receive visitors just as Wilderotter’s sister arrived.

When the sister was allowed to enter the emergency room treatment area, Cole understandably could have concluded that her initial denial was due to discrimination rather than the across-the-board policy of delaying visitation during the early stage of treatment, Newmyer said.

Wilderotter said the emergency room staff member’s comment referring to her sister as “family” and saying the sister could enter the area where she was being treated suggests that the staff member believed the sister rather than Cole should be allowed to enter the treatment area for a visit. Wilderotter said she has also heard from friends and others familiar with Washington Adventist Hospital that family members are sometime allowed in to visit a loved one in the emergency room even during the early stage of treatment by doctors and nurses.

“My sister took Linda by the hand and led her in,” said Wilderotter, who noted that she was comforted to see the two of them arrive at her side. Wilderotter said the staff member at the emergency room entrance didn’t attempt to stop Cole from entering the treatment area with her sister.

Catherine Holroyd, a Hyattsville, Md., resident contacted the Blade on Monday to report that she and her lesbian partner have been treated with respect and were fully recognized as a same-sex couple when the two have been admitted to Washington Adventist Hospital on separate occasions as patients.

“I’m a retired nurse,” Holroyd said. “I can tell you that we’ve been treated well at that hospital and so have other gay couples.”

HRC spokesperson Paul Gueguierre said Cole and Widerotter’s discrimination complaint has merit.

“Linda Cole was denied access to her partner during a time of great need,” he said. “Regardless of whether it was a simple communications problem, this was unfortunately a case of healthcare discrimination,” he said.

“We are encouraged by recent statements by hospital administrators that they do not discriminate and will take steps to prevent this from happening again in the future,” Guequierre said. ”We look forward to their participation in the Healthcare Equality Index. The HEI is designed to prevent cases like this one.”

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District of Columbia

D.C. Pride flag raising ceremony set for June 1

Mayor, council members to participate

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D.C. Mayor Muriel Bowser at the flag-raising of the Progress Pride flag at the Wilson Building in D.C. on June 1, 2023. (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

D.C. Mayor Muriel Bowser’s Office of LGBTQ Affairs is inviting the LGBTQ community and friends to attend the city’s annual Pride flag raising ceremony scheduled for 4 p.m. Monday, June 1, outside the John Wilson Building that serves as the D.C. City Hall.

Like in prior years, members of the D.C. Council and officials with the Office of LGBTQ Affairs were expected to join Bowser in delivering remarks on the front entrance steps at the Wilson Building before raising the Pride flag atop one of the tall flagpoles next to the building’s entrance.

Gaby Vincent, a spokesperson for the LGBTQ Affairs Office, said attendees of the flag raising ceremony will be invited to attend a reception immediately following the ceremony in the main lobby of the Wilson Building, which is located on Pennsylvania Avenue at 14th Street, N.W.

She said the reception will feature a DJ, dancing, and refreshments provided by the D.C. LGBTQ bar and café Spark Social House.  

Vincent said the flag raising event will also mark the 20th anniversary of the opening of the D.C. Mayor’s Office of LGBTQ Affairs.

In its official announcement of the flag raising event the LGBTQ Affairs Office also announced it is hosting the 7th annual District of Pride Showcase event to be held Friday, June 17, at 7 p.m. at the Lincoln Theater.

The announcement says LGBTQ community members, families, and allies are also invited to walk with Bowser in the Capital Pride Parade scheduled for Saturday, June 20. It says the mayor’s parade contingent will assemble at 2 p.m. at the parade’s starting location at 14th and U Streets, N.W.

“As we also celebrate the 20th anniversary of the Mayor’s Office of LGBTQ Affairs, we invite residents, community members, families and allies to join us throughout June for moments of pride, connection, visibility, and joy,” the announcement says.  

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District of Columbia

‘Queer Love’ campaign launched to address domestic violence

D.C. event set for LGBTQ+ Domestic Violence Awareness Day on May 28

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‘Domestic and family violence in LGBTQ+ communities is real and too often invisible,’ said Cesar Toledo, the Alston Foundation’s executive director. (Photo courtesy of Toledo)

The D.C.-based Wanda Alston Foundation, which provides housing and support services for homeless LGBTQ youth, announced earlier this month that it has joined partner organizations to launch a Queer Love Shouldn’t Hurt campaign aimed at addressing domestic violence within the LGBTQ community.

 In a May 18 statement, the Alston Foundation said the campaign involves a public awareness initiative leading up to LGBTQ+ Domestic Violence Awareness Day scheduled for May 28. 

“Domestic and family violence in LGBTQ+ communities is real and too often invisible,” Cesar Toledo, the Alston Foundation’s executive director, said in the statement. “As a community, we do not talk about it enough, and that silence can leave survivors feeling isolated and alone,” he said. “We must break that silence.”

He added that culturally competent care for those impacted by domestic violence is available through a newly launched website, queerlove.org, “where people can safely access vital resources, educational toolkits, and support networks they need on their healing journey.”

The website announces one of the project’s first events, a Queer Love Community Social, was scheduled for Thursday, May 28,  from 6-8 p.m. at the D.C. LGBTQ+ Community Center at 1827 Wiltberger St., N.W.

“Join us this LGBT+ Domestic Violence Awareness Day for a community social dedicated to visibility and survivor resilience,” the website statement says. “Let’s gather to strengthen our bonds, honor the path to healing, and share free resources,” it says of the May 28 event. 

The website also announces a June 1 workshop called Empowering Survivors of LGBTQ+ Intimate Partner Violence, which it says will be presented by Jesse Wedell, an official with the D.C. LGBT+ Counseling Collaborative. The website provides an online form to register for the workshop upon which its location would be disclosed.        

It identifies the partner organizations working with the Alston Foundation on the Queer Love Public Awareness Campaign as the LGBT+ Counseling Collaborative, Whitman-Walker Health, the D.C. LGBTQ+ Community Center, and Equality Chamber.

 The resources and information provided by the project can be accessed at www.queerlove.org.

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District of Columbia

Man accused of threatening to shoot D.C. bar employee after making anti-gay slurs

May 24 incident took place near Black Pride events on U Street

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(Bigstock photo)

D.C. police on Sunday, May 24, at around 4:20 p.m. arrested a Maryland man for allegedly threatening to shoot an employee while using anti-gay slurs at Ben’s Next Door restaurant and bar at 1211 U St., N.W.

According to a statement released by police and a police incident report, the arrested man, identified as Delonte Fraley, 32, of Accokeek, Md., made the threats after the employee told a bartender not to serve the man alcohol.

“The suspect overheard the employee and threatened to shoot the employee and used homophobic slurs against the employee,” the police statement says. “When the employee left the restaurant for the day, the suspect was standing near the employee’s vehicle,” it says.

“The employee returned to the restaurant and called the police,” the statement continues. “The suspect was apprehended by responding officers,” it says.

The police statement says the arresting officers charged Fraley with Felony Threats (Hate/Bias).

D.C. Superior Court records show prosecutors with the Office of the U.S. Attorney for D.C., which prosecutes D.C. criminal cases, escalated the charge to Threatening to Injure or Kidnap a Person (Bias-Related Hate Crime).

The incident occurred during Memorial Day weekend when thousands of visitors and D.C. area LGBTQ advocates and supporters were attending D.C. Black Pride events held in locations across the city, including Black Pride parties hosted by LGBTQ bars in the U Street entertainment area near Ben’s Next Door.

Among the nearby LGBTQ bars hosting D.C. Black Pride events were Nellie’s Sports Bar and Thurst Lounge. Ben’s Next Door is located next to the popular longtime U Street eatery Ben’s Chili Bowl.

Court records show that Judge Robert R. Rigsby at a May 25 presentment hearing released Fraley on personal recognizance with a stay-away order — the details of which were not publicly disclosed pending a June 4 preliminary hearing.   

A more detailed arrest affidavit filed in court by D.C. police says Fraley allegedly confronted the employee at Ben’s Next Door with anti-gay slurs on the day prior to his arrest.

“The complainant told the defendant that because he used homophobic slurs towards himself previously on May 23, 2026, and his hostess, as well as making threats to the complainant and calling him a faggot, he was unable to stay in the establishment,” the affidavit states.

It adds, “The defendant became irate stating, ‘I know where your Tesla is at. See me outside faggot, I will slap your ass’ and ‘I will shoot your ass.’” The affidavit says the complainant confirmed to police the Tesla referred to by Fraley was his vehicle. It says as the victim walked toward his car after getting off work, he saw Fraley standing directly in front of the car.

“The complainant stated he felt unsafe while the defendant was standing in front of his vehicle because he felt the defendant was capable of carrying out those threats,” says the affidavit. It says the victim then decided to return to the restaurant and call police without the defendant having seen him.  

“The defendant was placed under arrest for Felony Threats Hate/Bias and was transported to the Third District Station for processing,” the affidavit concludes.

It couldn’t immediately be determined whether the victim identifies as LGBTQ or whether any of the Ben’s Next Door patrons had been involved with D.C. Black Pride.

“Established in 2008, Ben’s Next Door is a family-owned and operated restaurant and bar on U Street, Northwest in Washington, D.C.,” a statement on its website says. “As a Black-owned establishment, it’s our goal to deliver a warm, welcoming, familiar, and communal vibe to all guests,” the statement says.    

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