a&e features
Aretha’s triple whammy
Queen of Soul’s on a roll with great local concert, her best new album in years (and a book she wishes had never seen the light of day)
Aretha on stage in Baltimore on Nov. 13. (Screen capture from a YouTube video by Jim Brunzell)
It wouldn’t be an Aretha Franklin concert without at least one head-scratching oddity. For the legendary diva’s latest concert in our region — last Thursday’s show at the Lyric in Baltimore — she came up (sure ’nuff!) with a real winner: for no apparent reason, she sang the encore “The Way We Were” off stage.
For the first minute or so, I suspected it might be a recording and that she was simply too lazy to sing her encore live. If you’ve followed the Queen for any length of time, this notion is hardly outside the realm of possibility. Many others suspected the same as the approximately 98 percent-capacity crowd started pouring out of the theater in droves. But just as many were calling it a night, Franklin — still off stage — inserted a few geographically specific ad libs to the song. It was just another “WTF” moment in a legendary six-decade career (seven if you count her teenage gospel debut) that has been, especially in the last 15-odd years, as noted for its eccentricities and oddities as its music.
These quirks are not as random as they may seem at first glance. With Franklin, who’s actually a lot more predictable than is widely acknowledged, her musical genius — and it truly is genius — is pretty much proportionate inversely with her indulgences, eccentricities and career- and relationship-sabotaging whims. A lifetime in show business has her well informed on just how much she can get away with and how much she has to deliver to keep the world eating out of her hand.
She did return, for a few fleeting moments, to wave good night while her orchestra — in another baffling choice — closed the show with a rousing instrumental rendition of the old warhorse “There’s No Business Like Show Business.”
It’s actually a great time to be an Aretha fan. Late last month she released her best album since 1998 (there’ve only been a few) with the all-covers set “Aretha Franklin Sings the Great Diva Classics.” Galaxies better than the interminably delayed 2011 train wreck known as “Aretha: A Woman Falling Out of Love,” Franklin — a singer known for her way with covers throughout her career — tackles stalwarts like “I Will Survive,” “I’m Every Woman,” “Midnight Train to Georgia” and, most notably, Adele’s “Rolling in the Deep,” which she tore up in a live performance on “Late Show with David Letterman,” a performance that went viral in September.
But if last week’s Baltimore concert — more on that in a bit — and the new album are the first two pieces of a modern Aretha trifecta, the third is a controversial pork chop for the ages that will be discussed and debated for decades — no exaggeration — to come: David Ritz’s towering biography “Respect: the Life of Aretha Franklin,” which dropped just days after her album in October.
At first glance, it’s easy to prematurely dismiss the book as a character assassination of almost “Mommie Dearest” proportions (not quite, but almost). The backstory is delicious: Ritz, having co-written Franklin’s 1999 memoir “Aretha: From These Roots,” laments in the “Respect” intro that he wasn’t able to crack the famously private Franklin facade. The ’99 book, although still a priceless piece of Franklin history in many ways, is about as honest and forthright as its heavily airbrushed cover photo (Franklin’s wildly fluctuating weight has dogged her for years, yet the cover makes her look more like Iman than herself at the time).
“In my view,” Ritz writes in the new book, “my two years of working on ‘From These Roots’ resulted in my failure to actualize the great potential in Aretha’s narration. I didn’t do what I set out to do. Since the publication of the book some 15 years ago, I have not rested easy. It took me a decade to recommit myself to the Aretha story, knowing that this time around, I would have to fly solo.”
What results is a no-holds-barred dishfest that has had media outlets as far ranging as the Daily Mail and Gawker regurgitating its bitchiest passages (which are legion). From family fights with her sisters Carolyn and Erma (also both singers) to passive-aggressive intransigence and egotism gone mad working with collaborators such as Luther Vandross and producer Oliver Leibert, to endless canceling of engagements at the 11th hour, a habit that cost her dearly in the courtroom and drove former booking agent Ruth Bowen (a priceless source of Aretha legend, quoted here at length) nearly mad, “Respect” drips with unflattering tale after tale, the cumulative effect of which is damning, yes, but also rather sad. If even a tenth of its stories are true, Franklin is still an egomaniacal control freak who’s impossible to deal with.
Modern-day Franklin would seem, at first glance, to be quite a different story. Having quit drinking and smoking many years ago and now having her weight under control after a mystery illness in the fall of 2010 — an episode she masterfully spun into an extended testimony/gospel vamp improvisation complete with de rigueur miraculous recovery that found her trotting Holy Ghost-style (the crowd ate it up) at last week’s show — one would like to think Franklin is at peace. Sadly, Ritz says that’s hardly the case. Although long banished from her inner circle, he makes a strong case now that she’s an imperious monster surrounded by yes people who don’t dare cross her. Beset by irrational fears — from her refusal to fly to her her habit of paying her band members cash which she carries around in a purse that’s never out of her site (an assistant both brought it out before Thursday’s show and retrieved it just as she left the stage so it was never out of her sight) — Ritz paints a portrait of a controlling and impulsive woman incapable of self scrutiny or critique.
Franklin, of course, begs to differ. She told the Wall Street Journal last week the book was “a book of trash” and nothing but “lies, lies and more lies.” News broke this week that she’s considering legal action.
It’s an interesting conundrum because the book is not the crucifixion either Franklin or the more salacious outlets would have you believe. What’s been totally lost in the discussion — hardly a surprise — is the book’s many passages of balancing anecdotes. Even those who share the book’s most unflattering tales — Carolyn, Erma and Bowen chief among them — are also some of Franklin’s most loyal compatriots.
“My sister was always engaged in acts of kindness and charity that went unreported,” Ritz quotes Erma as having said. “She and I would be watching the late news. There’d be a story about a woman who lost her home in a fire and the next thing you knew, Aretha was on the phone to the news station getting the woman’s number. The next day she’d send her a check for thirty thousand dollars.”
Brother and former manager Cecil is quoted as calling Aretha “an open-hearted person” and one who “always wanted to help her family.” One gradually senses that Aretha is, at heart, a good person and altruistic when push comes to shove.
Many moments of sheer and utter joy are recalled such as one where Erma, singing backup for Aretha in the studio, remembers her sister cutting — in a mind-boggling display of brilliance — the hits “Day Dreaming” and “Rock Steady” on the same day.
“That was a marvelous day,” she says. “Aretha absolutely tore up the vocal. We knew it was an instant classic.”
Anytime a highly unflattering celebrity biography comes out — one thinks of everything from J. Randy Taraborrelli’s “Call Her Miss Ross,” Christopher Ciccone’s “Life With My Sister Madonna,” Carol Ann Harris’s “Storms: My Life With Lindsey Buckingham and Fleetwood Mac” and many others — everyone debates the perceived verisimilitude of the books. Although opinions vary wildly — Taraborrelli even amended in a way, his Diana Ross books with a later, more balanced effort (2007’s “Diana Ross: a Biography”) — most would concur where there’s smoke, there’s at least some fire.
Groomed and mollycoddled by a doting father (the legendary Rev. C.L. Franklin) and armed with enough Grammys, RIAA certifications and life achievement awards (Rolling Stone even voted her the best singer of all time — an accolade she’s sure to have pointed out every time she’s introduced), it’s easy to see how someone like Franklin could manage to live in her own little world, largely immune to anything she wishes to ignore. (A curious side note: Ritz quotes Carolyn as saying how happy she was to hear of the Stonewall riots in 1969; Aretha, who has supported gay causes in more recent years, initially “found the topic distasteful,” Ritz says.)
The best argument against Ritz’s book, which has gotten strong reviews in USA Today and the New York Times, is that the vast majority of the people he quotes, such as Aretha’s siblings and the voluminously quoted Bowen, are dead.
“He offers no proof that he interviewed them,” says Roger Friedman, writing for showbiz411.com. “Ritz wrote a whole book about Ray Charles. But none of the Ray Charles info in ‘Respect’ was in the Ray book. Suddenly a dead Ray Charles has a whole lot of new quotes about Aretha Franklin.”
It’s a good point, but hardly a damning one. Having co-written a whole book with Charles, (1978’s “Brother Ray”), it’s wholly conceivable that the two spent many hours together and that Ritz could have substantial outtakes Charles either didn’t want in his own book or one party or the other didn’t think were pertinent.
Also curiously absent are the slightest comments or input from any of Franklin’s four sons, two of whom (again, oddly) are pictured with her in the booklet for her new album. It’s debatable the degree to which Franklin herself actually raised these boys, two of whom were born when she was a teen. A passing reference from sister-in-law Earline notes that at one point in the early ‘70s, “Clarence and Eddie were back in Detroit being cared for by Big Mama (Franklin’s grandmother),” and “Teddy was being raised by his father’s folks.” While Teddy played guitar for his mom for years, at times hawking his own recordings outside her shows, the Franklin children are largely a mystery. While Diana Ross counters much of her negative press with united-front photos of her with all five smiling grown children in tow every time she gets an award, I don’t know that a single photo of Franklin with all four of her boys has ever surfaced publicly (Tina Turner’s grown sons are equally as low-key and almost never seen).
This absence of comment is telling. A historian as thorough as Ritz surely tried to get their input. There are a few other flaws with “Respect.” Although perhaps unavoidable considering Ritz knows Franklin personally and witnessed some of the incidents first hand, the shifts into first person are jarring. And there are curious omissions. For all the talk of Aretha’s heavily religious (albeit liberal) formative years, we leave without the slightest sense of whether she has been much of a church goer in her adult years or, if celebrity and travel prevent it, where she gets her spiritual needs met now. Bishop Carlton Pearson was her guest at her 2012 Washington concert at DAR Constitution Hall and her faith background is essential to her persona. And although her appearance on a 1994 episode of “Saturday Night Live” might be seen as a minor matter overall, it gives an interesting insight into the legend. Perhaps compensating for a not-quite-ready-for-prime-time guest host Nancy Kerrigan (fresh off the ’94 Olympics) Franklin, in addition to being that week’s musical guest, also hilariously spoofs her persona in a mock BET interview sketch. If nothing else, it shows Franklin does not always take herself as seriously as Ritz and his flock of mostly dead mudslingers would have you believe. And she hardly sings her hit “Angel” at every concert as Ritz posits: in fact the only time she’s sung it at any of her D.C. concerts in the last decade was at her summer 2011 show at Wolf Trap.
Aretha’s cousin and long-time back-up singer Brenda Corbett, very much alive yet not in her usual spot at last week’s concert, is, however, quoted and is as forthcoming and candid as Carolyn and Erma (both, along with brother Cecil, sadly gone) were.
“I’ve been singing background with my cousin for some 42 years,” Ritz quotes her as saying. “And I still don’t know — record from record or concert from concert — where she’s going to hire me or fire me. Months will go by when she cuts off all communication with me. She’s furious with me and I never know why. Then she’ll call and we’re back together like nothing ever happened.”
It’s a pattern Ritz says happens over and over with family and longtime associates. And like abuse patterns — when many people over decades have eerily similar stories — the tales gain traction.
Ritz’s book ultimately succeeds because it holistically presents a balanced psychological portrait of the great legend. It’s an unexpectedly satisfying unofficial companion to Anthony Heilbut’s brilliant 2012 book “The Fan Who Knew Too Much: Aretha Franklin, the Rise of the Soap Opera, Children of the Gospel Church and Other Meditations.” Though only part of it focuses on Franklin, it’s the most contextualizing thing about her that’s ever been written. Ritz also deserves credit for having the balls to publish this while Franklin (72) is still alive. He could easily have taken the Darwin Porter (known for his trashy celeb bios always published within a year of the subject’s passing) approach, but he opted to forge ahead.
So what’s the deal with Aretha? Is it just Norma Desmond-ism — talent-plus-ego run amok?
Perhaps a quote from Carolyn sums it up best: “I think she was basically afraid that she wasn’t enough,” Ritz quotes her as saying. “Crazy as it sounds, she was afraid that she wasn’t good enough as a singer, pretty enough as a woman or devoted enough as a mother. I don’t know what to call it except deep, deep insecurity.
Ritz offers his own summation in the book’s coda. “In her troubled mind,” he writes, “control is the antidote to fear. She hires, fires and rehires a battery of publicists, booking agents and managers because, when all is said and done, she cannot relinquish control. … When these efforts fail, she deflects the blame. Self-scrutiny is not her way. Her methods of denial have been perfected over a lifetime.” He also writes, though, that she’s the “ultimate survivor, a symbol of strength” who “keeps moving forward, no matter what.”
Ritz also gains credibility to an extent because his love and admiration for the woman — of which he’s unabashed — comes shining through. His laments about the things he wishes Aretha would do, the career twists and turns he longs for her to have made, echo those expressed by many a gay man for the divas they love. With Franklin, it’s especially sad because the sheer magnitude of her greatest great moments indicate how much more she could have accomplished if she had personal discipline, the ability for introspection, a management team whose advice she heeded and better artistic instincts. Hers, unfortunately, have just as often let her down (like attempting a ballet routine at a Clive Davis tribute with a straight face) as reinforced or at times even expanded her legend (subbing memorably for an ailing Pavarotti at the ’98 Grammys).
His description of his ultimate dream for her furnishes a lovely, though bittersweet, moment: “I wanted her to realize a concert with only a superb jazz trio behind her as she sings George Gershwin and Cole Porter and the blues ballads of Percy Mayfield,” he writes. “I wanted her to sit at the piano and accompany herself as she revisits her best songs and the songs of Thomas A. Dorsey and James Cleveland and Curtis Mayfield” and to “put her performing and recording career in the hands of producers noted for impeccable taste, musical restraint and unfettered imagination.” They’re all things, sadly, that will likely never happen.
Leaving an Aretha concert, one has many similar thoughts. Her shows vary in quality — like Ritz, I’ve seen her on several occasions, merely going through the motions and serving up adequate, but hardly inspiring, renditions of her classic hits.
But catch her on a good night — and last Thursday was one — and there are magical moments to be had amidst the clutter (did we really need an on-stage presentation from the local Delta Sigma Theta chapter?) and repetition (she’s used Jackie Wilson’s “Your Love Keeps Lifting Me,” a song she’s never recorded, as her opening number for several years now; it’s a fine song she delivers solidly, but the lack of imagination considering her vast catalogue is inane).
Her cut from “Waiting to Exhale,” “Hurts Like Hell,” was a delicious surprise, that gave her a great little musical cushion upon which to unfurl her trademark melismas, “It’s Just Your Love” was a wildly unexpected deep album cut from the “Jump To It” album and the aforementioned testimony vamp had all the energy and passion one would expect from a soul legend and product of the church whose authenticity of faith has never been questioned.
Probably a little shy in terms of overall quality compared to her Nov. 2012 show at DAR (her last in the region), which included scintillating renditions of “Day Dreaming,” “Think” and “Something He Can Feel,” the Baltimore concert was still highly enjoyable. She looked resplendent in two different gowns and was far more spry and mobile than she was at her heaviest about five years ago. Even with the repetition, the woman truly never gives the same show twice. She mixes up her set list oceans more than her contemporaries like Dionne Warwick, Gladys Knight or Diana Ross, whose set list is essentially the same one she’s been using the last five years.
It’s all part of the joy and frustration of being an Aretha Franklin fan. As Ritz has learned the hard way, you either take the Queen on her terms or you don’t take her at all. Each person, fan and minion alike, has to decide for him- or herself if the sweet outweighs the bitter. Last Thursday night, it did.
- Overture (orchestra)
• Introduction of Aretha (8:52 p.m.) - Your Love Keeps Lifting Me Higher and Higher
- It’s Just Your Love
- Don’t Play That Song
- Hurts Like Hell
- Sweet 16
- gospel vamp/testimony
- Chain of Fools (w/ dancers)
- band jam — Another Star/band solos
• recorded track — Aretha returns dancing with Willie Wilkerson
• presentation from Delta Sigma Theta
• recognition of honored guests - Old Landmark
- I Remember (Keyshia Cole)
- Rolling in the Deep
- You Send Me (Aretha at the piano)
- Freeway of Love (with dancers)
- Respect (with dancers)
ENCORE - The Way We Were
- No Business Like Show Business (orchestra)
(show ends at 10:30 p.m.)
a&e features
Transmission DC breathes new life into a storied sound space
A fresh home for boundary-pushing culture on H Street
Late last year, phoenix-style, a fresh home for boundary-pushing culture arose on the H Street corridor. Transmission DC – a queer, trans, and POC-owned, operated, and centered community-focused venue – powered on in the former home to the Rock & Roll Hotel (famously, not a hotel, but very much rock & roll). Transmission (1353 H St., N.E.) arrives secure in its mandate – or even birthright – to provide a place to celebrate creativity and music through a lens of inclusivity and respect.
Transmission’s team brings experience, but also representation. Owners/partners Kabir Khanna (who is also programming director), Katii B, Ellie McDyre, and Kelli Kerrigan together previously managed 618 productions, a venue in Chinatown, crafting “some of D.C.’s freakiest parties, raves, and mosh pits” they note.
They packed up operations last fall to a space curated specifically for D.C.’s underground music and culture scene, building their efforts in Chinatown to bring in more fans in queer and POC circles.
Transmission, Khanna points out, is built on DIY values. In the music scene, DIY means that promoters and organizers – often disconnected from the mainstream and part of marginalized communities – build shows and programs collaboratively, but independently from institutions, supporting each other as smaller, independent venues close. Here, Transmission aims to ensure that those putting together these underground inclusive shows have a more permanent and stable home, can have access to resources, and can provide more sustainable income to artists. “We’re trying to get more people to support and enjoy the music, and also give artists and organizers within the DIY community more structure and a larger cut,” says Khanna.
Khanna also notes that Transmission operates “under the principles of safety, inclusivity, and respect.” McDyre added that even at venues that claim inclusivity, that statement might not take place in practice. We’re “not just pitting up a rainbow flag,” says McDyre, but as some of the owners are trans and POC, audiences can see themselves reflected at the top.
Much like the DIY nature of the music community, the Transmission owners brought a DIY ethos to turning around their space.
In March 2020 – the height of COVID lockdowns – Rock & Roll Hotel suddenly shuttered, though not due to the pandemic; instead, the venue claimed that decreasing sales and increasing competition led to the closure. For 14 years, it was the central spot for cheap beer and lesser-known and celebrated acts. The space stood vacant for more than five years, until Transmission turned the power back on.
“When we got into the space, it was effectively abandoned for years,” says Khanna. “There was a ton of mold, and paint primer covering all surfaces. It was nearly falling apart.” Khanna noted that many music venues like this one, regardless of how well it was maintained, “get the shit kicked out of it,” given the nature of shows. The team called in mold removal contractors, ripped up most of the floorboards, and started fresh.
Transmission’s first floor is styled as a stripped-down black box: the better to take in the music. “It’s minimal on purpose to act as a canvas for set design and music,” without a specific aesthetic, says Khanna. Moving upstairs, the second floor has been opened up, removing some walls, and now has a larger dance area than the first floor. Beyond the first two performance levels, and a holdover from Rock & Roll Hotel, is the rooftop. Though without a stage, the rooftop space is filled with murals splashed across the walls, with a full bar. Transmission’s current capacity is 496, but the team is looking to grow that number. Transmission will also leverage the full kitchen that Rock & Roll Hotel operated, bringing in Third Hand Kitchen to offer a variety of food, including vegan and vegetarian options.
Khanna pointed out an upcoming show reflective of Transmission’s inclusive ethos: Black Techo Matters on Feb. 27. The event is set to be “a dynamic, collaborative night of underground electronic music celebrating Black History Month.” Khanna says that techno came from Black music origins, and this event will celebrate this genesis with a host of artists, including DJ Stingray 313, Carlos Souffront, and Femanyst.
a&e features
Meet D.C.’s Most Eligible Queer Singles
Our annual report, just in time for Valentine’s Day
Just in time for Valentine’s Day, the Blade is happy to present our annual Most Eligible Singles issue. The Singles were chosen by you, our readers, in an online nominations process.
John Marsh
Age: 35
Occupation: DJ and Drag Entertainer
How do you identify? Male
What are you looking for in a mate? I’m looking for someone who’s ready to dive into life’s adventures with me. someone independent and building their own successes, but equally open to supporting each other’s dreams along the way. I know that probably sounds simple because, honestly, who isn’t looking for that? But my life and career keep me very social and busy, so it’s important to me to build trust with someone who understands that. I want a partner who knows that even when life gets hectic or I’m getting a lot of attention through my work in the community, it doesn’t take away from my desire to build something real, intentional, and meaningful with the right person.
Biggest turn off: My biggest turnoff is arrogance or judgment toward others. I’m most drawn to people who are comfortable being themselves and who treat everyone with the same level of respect and care. I’ve worked hard for the success I’ve found, but I believe in staying humble and leading with kindness, and I’m attracted to people who live the same way. I’m also turned off by exclusionary mindsets, especially the idea that sapphic folks don’t belong in gay spaces. Our community is vibrant, diverse, and strongest when it’s shared with everyone who shows up with respect and love
Biggest turn on: I’m drawn to people who can confidently walk into new spaces and create connection. Being able to read a room and make others feel comfortable shows emotional intelligence and empathy, which I find incredibly attractive. I also come from a very social, open, and welcoming family environment, so being with someone who embraces community and enjoys bringing people together is really important to me.
Hobbies: I have a lot of hobbies and love staying creative and curious. I’m a great cook, so you’ll never have to worry about going hungry around me. In my downtime, I watch a lot of anime and I will absolutely talk your ear off about my favorites if you let me. I’m also a huge music fan and K-pop lover (listen to XG!), and I’m a musician who plays the cello. I spend a lot of time sewing as well, which is a big part of my creative expression. My hobbies can be a little all over the place, but I just genuinely love learning new skills and trying new things whenever I can.
What is your biggest goal for 2026? This year feels like a huge milestone for me. I’m getting ready to join a tour this summer and want to represent myself well while building meaningful connections in every city I perform in. I’m also focused on growing as a DJ, sharing more mixes and content online, and reaching a big creative goal of releasing original music that I’m producing.
Pets, Kids or Neither? I have a lovely Akita named Grady that I’ve had for 10 years and always want pets in my life. I’m open to kids when/if the time is right with the right person.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from yours? Hell no. I don’t see political differences as just policy disagreements anymore – they often reflect deeper values about how we treat people and support our communities. I’m very progressive in my beliefs, and I’m looking for a partner who shares that mindset. For me, alignment in values like equity, compassion, and social responsibility is non-negotiable in a relationship. To be very clear about my beliefs, I’m outspoken about my opposition to immigration enforcement systems like ICE and believe both political parties have contributed to policies that have caused real harm to vulnerable communities. I’m also deeply disturbed by the ongoing violence in Palestine and believe we need to seriously examine our support of military actions that have resulted in the loss of countless innocent lives. These aren’t abstract political opinions for me, they are moral issues that directly inform who I am and what I stand for.
Celebrity crush: Cocona
Name one obscure fact about yourself: I used to own a catering business in college that paid for my school — I also went to a Christian college, lol.
Jackie Zais
Age: 35
Occupation: Senior director at nonprofit
How do you identify? Lesbian woman
What are you looking for in a mate? Looking for someone who’s curious about the world and the people in it — the kind of person who’s down to explore a new spot one night and stay in with takeout the next. Confident in who they are, social without being exhausting, adventurous but grounded, thoughtful but not pretentious. Someone who can be funny while still taking life (and relationships) seriously.
Biggest turn off: Doesn’t have strong opinions. I love hearing a wild hot take.
Biggest turn on: When someone can make me belly laugh.
Hobbies: Number one will always be yapping with friends over food, but I also love collecting new hobbies. Currently, I crochet (and have some dapper sweater vests as a result), listen to audiobooks on what I personally think is a normal speed (2x) and play soccer and pickleball. But I’ve tried embroidery, papier-mâché, collaging, collecting plants, scrap booking, and mosaic.
What is your biggest goal for 2026? I’ve recently started swimming and I want to look less like a flailing fish and more like someone who knows what they’re doing.
Pets, Kids or Neither? I have neither but open to kids
Would you date someone whose political views differ from yours? My best friend is a moderate Democrat and that’s as far right as I’m willing to go.
Celebrity crush: Tobin Heath
Name one obscure fact about yourself: I’m the daughter of Little Miss North Quincy 1967.
Kevin Schultz
Age: 39
Occupation: Product manager
How do you identify? Gay
What are you looking for in a mate? You know 2001’s hottest Janet Jackson single, “Someone to Call My Lover?” To quote Janet, “Maybe, we’ll meet at a bar, He’ll drive a funky car; Maybe, we’ll meet at a club, And fall so deeply in love.”
Realistically though, I’d love to find someone who loves to walk everywhere and who avoids the club because it’s too loud and crowded. Later in the song, our songstress opines “My, my, looking for a guy, guy, I don’t want him too shy; But he’s gotta have the qualities, That I like in a man: Strong, smart, affectionate” and I’m quite aligned there – I’m an introvert looking for someone more extroverted.
I’m looking for someone who is different from me. When the math works, one plus one should equal two. Two becoming one is more art, and my relational approach is more science, or, I guess, math.
Biggest turn off: I’m turned off by a lot of superficially small things — chewing with one’s mouth open, dirty or untrimmed fingernails, oh, and also, lack of self awareness. My personal brand of anxiety is hyper self-aware, so I’m very turned off by someone who doesn’t realize that they exist in the world with others.
Biggest turn on: Competency. Or maybe…eyes? So perhaps, you see my conundrum — I’m very engaged by people who are deeply engaged by something, but I’d be lying if I said a sharp gaze and a wink didn’t get me. And, you know, some stamina in all avenues, mental and physical doesn’t hurt either.
Hobbies: Fixing everyone’s WiFi (this did actually get me a date once), and just generally fixing everyone’s everything. If it’s got a plug, screen, or buttons I can probably help you with it. On my own, I’m really into smart home devices and automation, and just to be timely, my latest thing is setting up and tuning my own instance of OpenClaw. (No one should actually do this, which is why I’m trying.) Together, we could also explore such hobbies as visiting every Metro station, visiting and exploring a new airport, and exploring why there are so many gay transit nerds. There’s no non-fake sounding way to say this but I also just love knowledge seeking, so I’d also love to go on an adventure with you where we learn something brand new.
What is your biggest goal for 2026? My biggest goal is to arrive to 2027 just a little better than I arrived to 2026. A few gym goals, a few personal goals, a few work goals; I hope to get a few of them across the finish line. At the risk of holding myself accountable, one of those goals is to be able to flawlessly side plank for over a minute. Please don’t mistake me for a huge gym rat; I just have a questionable relationship with balance and I’m really working on it.
Pets, Kids or Neither? I’ll just be blunt: no pets. Stating this on my Hinge profile resulted in an exponential loss of matches, so it’s very fun to trot out the idea. Primarily, I’m allergic to cats and dogs so my aversion is mostly biological. I’m not, however, allergic to kids — big fan of my various nieces and nephews — but I’d really only consider kids of my own if my chosen companion and I could financially afford them without compromise, and at this age I’ve become opinionated about the life I want to live.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from yours? No. This becomes a simpler answer with each passing day, unfortunately.
Celebrity crush: If I’m being of the moment, of course, it’s going to be one of the gentlemen on “Heated Rivalry,” but if I were to really dig into the archives it would be pre-Star Trek Chris Pine. I first saw him in an absolute train wreck of a movie called “Blind Dating” where he plays a blind guy who tries to pretend to be sighted in order to date. The movie was terrible, but I found him irresistible.
Name one obscure fact about yourself: I went suddenly deaf on one side only (my left) just before my 33rd birthday. After a bit of time in the wilderness (metaphorically) I got a cochlear implant a few years later, and it really changed my life. I will talk until someone stops me about hearing, sound, and the amazing arena of hearing loss technology. A lot of people, when they see my implant, assume I was born with hearing loss, so it’s always a bit odd (obscure even!) when I tell people I lost it as an adult. But, I also got my hearing back as an adult and am an eager advocate for assistive technology and visibility for people with disabilities that are not always immediately visible. I also work with prospective adult implant candidates to determine if an implant is right for them, because losing hearing suddenly as an adult is isolating and it’s helpful to talk to someone who’s been there.
Gabriel Acevero
Age: 35
Occupation: Maryland State Delegate
How do you identify? Gay
What are you looking for in a mate? Emotional intelligence and a sense of humor.
Biggest turn off: Fetishization.
Biggest turn on: Kindness and emotional intelligence.
Hobbies: Traveling and reading (I love books).
What is your biggest goal for 2026? More self care. I love what I do but it can also be physically taxing. In 2026, I’m prioritizing more self care.
Pets, Kids or Neither? I have neither but I’m open to both.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from yours? No.
Celebrity crush: Kofi Siriboe
Name one obscure fact about yourself: I’m a Scorpio who was raised by a Scorpio and I have many Scorpios in my life.
Vida Rangel
Age: 36
Occupation: Public Servant, Community Organizer
How do you identify? I am a queer transLatina
What are you looking for in a mate? I’m looking for a partner who is caring, socially aware, and passionate about meaningfully improving some part of this world we all live in. Ideally someone playful who can match my mischievous energy, will sing and dance with me whenever joy finds us, and will meet me at protests and community meetings when the moment calls for bold collective action.
Biggest turn off: Ego. Confidence can be cute, but humility is sexy.
Biggest turn on: Drive. Seeing someone put their heart into pursuing their goals is captivating. Let’s chase our dreams together!
Hobbies: Music in all its forms (karaoke, playing guitar, concerts, musicals…), finding reasons to travel to new places, and making (Mexican) tamales for friends and coworkers.
What is your biggest goal for 2026? My biggest goal for 2026 is to organize and a celebratory kiss on election night wouldn’t hurt.
Pets, Kids or Neither? An adorable black cat named Rio (short for Misterio)
Would you date someone whose political views differ from yours? Ma’am? If you feel the need to ask…
Celebrity crush: Mi amor, Benito Bad Bunny. Zohran Mamdani, too. I have lots of love to give.
Name one obscure fact about yourself: I worked at Chick-fil-A when I was in high school and was fired after just three months. At the time it was still legal to fire someone for being trans, but I’m pretty sure it was because I called out to go to a Halloween party.
Em Moses
Age: 34
Occupation: Publishing
How do you identify? Queer
What are you looking for in a mate? Companionship, passion, fun. I seek a confident partner who inspires me, someone to laugh and dance with, someone with a rich internal universe of interests and experiences to build upon. A lifelong friend.
Biggest turn off: Dishonesty.
Biggest turn on: I love when someone is exactly themselves, nurturing their passions and skills and showing up uniquely in this world as only they can.
Hobbies: I love to read. I create art with my hands. When the weather is nice I’m outside, walking around the District looking at flowers and trees.
What is your biggest goal for 2026? My main goal this year is to spend more time with my nieces and nephews.
Pets, Kids or Neither? No pets or children in my life currently.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from yours? While I consider myself quite openminded and genuinely enjoy learning from perspectives different from my own, I have clear boundaries around my morals and those pillars do not fall.
Celebrity crush: Luigi Mangione
Name one obscure fact about yourself: My first job was at a donut shop.
Nate Wong
Age: 41
Occupation: Strategy adviser to nonprofits and philanthropists to help ambitious ideas turn into meaningful, positive societal impact.
How do you identify? Gay (he/him)
What are you looking for in a mate? An additive partner: sociable, adventurous, and curious about the world. I’m drawn to warmth, openness, and people who show up fully — one-on-one and in community. If you enjoy a good dinner party, make eye contact, and actually talk to strangers (I know a D.C. no-no), we’ll get along just fine.
Biggest turn off: Not being present. Active listening matters to me; attention is a form of respect (and honestly, very attractive). And a picky food eater (how will we some day be joint food-critics?).
Biggest turn on: Curiosity, adventuresome spirit, and someone who can hold their own in a room — and still make others feel at ease. Confidence is best when it’s generous.
Hobbies: Splitting my time between the ceramics studio (District Clay), planning the next trip, and finding great food spots. I box to balance it all out, and I love curating small, adventurous gatherings that bring interesting people together — the kind where you stay later than planned.
What is your biggest goal for 2026? The last few years threw some curve balls. So 2026 is all about moving forward more freely and passionately, trusting what feels right and following it with intention (and joy).
Pets, Kids or Neither? Open to kids (in a variety of forms — already have some adorable god kids). A hypoallergenic dog would absolutely raise the cuddle quotient; cats are best admired from a respectful, allergy-safe distance.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from yours? I value thoughtful listening and sincere debate; shared values around the honoring of everyone’s humanity, equity, and justice matter to me and aren’t up for debate.
Celebrity crush: Bad Bunny style with Jason Momoa humble confidence (harking to my Hawaiian roots) and Idris Elba charm — range matters.
Name one obscure fact about yourself: I celebrated medical clearance by going surfing in El Salvador. I’ve also nearly been arrested in Mozambique and somehow walked away unscathed (and without complying with a bribe) — happy to explain over an excursion.
Diane D’Costa
Age: 29
Occupation: Artist + Designer
How do you identify? Queer/lesbian
What are you looking for in a mate? A cuddle buddy, a fellow jet setter, a muse! Someone to light my soul on fire (in a good way).
Biggest turn off: Apathy. I care deeply about a lot of things and need someone with a similar curiosity and zest for life.
Biggest turn on: Mutuality really does it for me — a push and pull, someone who will throw it back and also catch it. I love someone who takes initiative, shows care and compassion, and expresses fluidity and confidence.
Hobbies: You can find me throwing pottery, painting, sipping natural wine, supporting local coffee shops, and most definitely tearing up a QTBIPOC dance floor.
What is your biggest goal for 2026? Producing my first solo art show. This year I’m really leaning into actualizing all my visions and dreams and putting them out into the world.
Pets, Kids or Neither? I’ve got a Black Lab named Lennox after the one and only D.C. icon, Ari Lennox. I love supporting the youth and (made a career out of it), but don’t necessarily need to have little ones of my own.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from yours? No. Values alignment is key, but if you wanna get into the nuances of how we actualize collective liberation let’s get into it.
Celebrity crush: Queen Latifah
Name one obscure fact about yourself: I’m in the “Renaissance” movie. I know, I know slight flex… but “Crazy In Love” bottom left corner for a split second and a harsh crop, but I’m in there. “You are the visuals, baby” really hit home for me.
Donna Marie Alexander
Age: 67
Occupation: Social Worker
How do you identify? Lesbian
What are you looking for in a mate? Looking for a smart, kind, emotionally grown woman who knows who she is and is ready for real companionship. Also, great discernment and a good lesbian processor. Bonus points if you’ll watch a game with me— or at least cheer when I do. Extra bonus if you already know that women’s sports matter.
Ideal first date: Out for tea or a Lemon Drop that turns into dinner, great conversation, and a few laughs. Low drama, high warmth.
Must haves: A sense of humor, curiosity about the self, curiosity about me, and curiosity about the world. An independence, and an appreciation for loyalty—on and off the field. Dealbreaker: Anyone who thinks “it’s just a game.”
Biggest turn off: Self-centered and a lack of discernment.
Biggest turn on: Great conversation and a sense of humor.
Hobbies: Watching the Commanders game
What is your biggest goal for 2026? Self-growth and meeting an amazing friend.
Pets, Kids or Neither? I have two kids and grandkids.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from yours? No
Celebrity crush: Pam Grier
Name one obscure fact about yourself: She’s way more superstitious about game-day routines than she lets on
Joe Reberkenny
Age: 24
Occupation: Journalist
How do you identify? Gay
What are you looking for in a mate? Someone who’s driven, flexible, and independent. I’m a full-time journalist so if there’s news happening, I’ve gotta be ready to cover breaking stories. I’m looking for someone who also has drive in their respective career and is always looking to the future. I need someone who gets along with my friends. My friends and community here are so important to me and I’m looking for someone who can join me in my adventures and enjoys social situations.
Biggest turn off: Insecurity and cocky men. Guys who can’t kiki with the girls. Early bedtimes.
Biggest turn on: Traits: Emotional stability and reliability. A certain sense of safety and trust. Someone organized and open to trying new things. Physical: Taller than I am (not hard to do at 5’7″) but also a preference for hairy men (lol). Someone who can cook (I am a vegetarian/occasional pescatarian and while it’s not a requirement for me in a partner it would need to be something they can accommodate).
Hobbies: Exploring D.C. — from museums to nightlife, reading (particularly interested in queer history), dancing, frolicking, playing bartender, listening to music (preferably pop), classic movie connoisseur (TCM all the way).
What is your biggest goal for 2026? Continue my work covering LGBTQ issues related to the federal government, uplift queer voices, see mother monster (Lady Gaga) in concert.
Pets, Kids or Neither? I’ve got neither but I love a pet.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from yours? No
Celebrity crush: Pedro Pascal
Name one obscure fact about yourself: I’ve been hit by multiple cars and I have a twin sister.
a&e features
Marc Shaiman reflects on musical success stories
In new memoir, Broadway composer talks ‘Fidler,’ ‘Wiz,’ and stalking Bette Midler
If you haven’t heard the name Marc Shaiman, you’ve most likely heard his music or lyrics in one of your favorite Broadway shows or movies released in the past 50 years. From composing the Broadway scores for Hairspray and Catch Me if You Can to most recently working on Only Murders in the Building, Hocus Pocus 2, and Mary Poppins Returns, the openly queer artist has had a versatile career — one that keeps him just an Oscar away from EGOT status.
The one thing the award-winning composer, lyricist, and writer credits with launching his successful career? Showing up, time and time again. Eventually, he lucked out in finding himself at the right place at the right time, meeting industry figures like Rob Reiner, Billy Crystal, and Bette Midler, who were immediately impressed with his musical instincts on the piano.
“Put my picture under the dictionary definition for being in the right place at the right time,” Shaiman says. “What I often try to say to students is, ‘Show up. Say yes to everything.’ Because you never know who is in the back of the theater that you had no idea was going to be there. Or even when you audition and don’t get the part. My book is an endless example of dreams coming true, and a lot of these came true just because I showed up. I raised my hand. I had the chutzpah!”
Recalling one example from his memoir, titled Never Mind the Happy: Showbiz Stories from a Sore Winner ( just hit bookshelves on Jan. 27), Shaiman says he heard Midler was only hiring Los Angeles-based artists for her world tour. At the young age of 20, the New York-based Shaiman took a chance and bought the cheapest flight he could find from JFK. Once landing in L.A., he called up Midler and simply asked: “Where’s rehearsal?”
“Would I do that nowadays? I don’t know,” Shaiman admits. “But when you’re young and you’re fearless … I was just obsessed, I guess you could say. Maybe I was a stalker! Luckily, I was a stalker who had the goods to be able to co-create with her and live up to my wanting to be around.”
On the occasion of Never Mind the Happy’s official release, the Bladehad the opportunity to chat with Shaiman about his decades-spanning career. He recalls the sexual freedom of his community theater days, the first time he heard someone gleefully yell profanities during a late screening of The Rocky Horror Picture Show, and why the late Rob Reiner was instrumental to both his career and his lasting marriage to Louis Mirabal. This interview has been edited and condensed.
BLADE: Naturally, a good place to start would be your book, “Never Mind the Happy.” What prompted you to want to tell the story of your life at this point in your career?
SHAIMAN: I had a couple of years where, if there was an anniversary of a movie or a Broadway show I co-created, I’d write about it online. People were always saying to me, “Oh my God, you should write a book!” But I see them say that to everybody. Someone says, “Oh, today my kitten knocked over the tea kettle.” “You should write a book with these hysterical stories.” So I just took it with a grain of salt when people would say that to me. But then I was listening to Julia Louis-Dreyfus’ podcast, and Jane Fonda was on talking about her memoir — not that I’m comparing myself to a career like Jane Fonda’s — but she felt it was time to take a life review. That really stuck in my head. At the time, I was sulking or moping about something that had not gone as well as I wished. And I guess I kind of thought, “Let me look back at all these things that I have done.” Because I have done a lot. I’m just weeks short of my 50th year in show business, despite how youthful I look! I just sat down and started writing before anyone asked, as far as an actual publisher.
I started writing as a way to try to remind myself of the joyous, wonderful things that have happened, and for me not to always be so caught up on what didn’t go right. I’ve been telling some of these stories over the years, and it was really fun to sit down and not just be at a dinner party telling a story. There’s something about the written word and really figuring out the best way to tell the story and how to get across a certain person’s voice. I really enjoyed the writing. It was the editing that was the hard part!
BLADE: You recall experiences that made you fall in love with the world of theater and music, from the days you would skip class to go see a show or work in regional productions. What was it like returning to those early memories?
SHAIMAN: Wonderful. My few years of doing community theater included productions that were all kids, and many productions with adults, where I was this freaky little 12-year-old who could play show business piano beyond my years. It was just bizarre! Every time a director would introduce me to another cast of adults, they’d be like, “Are you kidding?” I’d go to the piano, and I would sightread the overture to Funny Girl, and everybody said, “Oh, OK!” Those were just joyous, wonderful years, making the kind of friends that are literally still my friends. You’re discovering musical theatre, you’re discovering new friends who have the same likes and dreams, and discovering sex. Oh my god! I lost my virginity at the opening night of Jesus Christ Superstar, so I’m all for community theater!
BLADE: What do you recall from your early experiences watching Broadway shows? Did that open everything up for you?
SHAIMAN: I don’t remember seeing Fiddler on the Roof when I was a kid, but I remember being really enthralled with this one woman’s picture in the souvenir folio — the smile on her face as she’s looking up in the pictures or looking to her father for approval. I always remember zooming in on her and being fascinated by this woman’s face: turns out it was Bette Midler. So my love for Bette Midler began even before I heard her solo records.
Pippin and The Wiz were the first Broadway musicals I saw as a young teenager who had started working in community theater and really wanted to be a part of it. I still remember Pippin with Ben Vereen and all those hands. At the time, I thought getting a seat in the front row was really cool — I’ve learned since that it only hurts your neck, but I remember sitting in the front row at The Wiz as Stephanie Mills sang Home. Oh my god, I can still see it right now. And then I saw Bette Midler in concert, finally, after idolizing her and being a crazed fan who did nothing but listen to her records, dreaming that someday I’d get to play for her. And it all came true even before I turned 18 years old. I just happened to be in the right place at the right time, and met one of her backup singers and became their musical director. I was brought to a Bette Midler rehearsal. I still hadn’t even turned 18, she heard me play and said, “Stick around.” And I’ve stuck around close to 55 years! She’s going to interview me in L.A. at the Academy Museum. Would I have ever thought that Bette Midler would say yes to sitting with me, interviewing me about my life and career?
BLADE: That’s amazing. Has she had a chance to read the book yet?
SHAIMAN: She read it. We just talked yesterday, and she wants to ask the right questions at the event. And she even said to me, “Marc, I wasn’t even aware of all that you’ve done.” We’ve been great friends for all these years, but sometimes months or almost years go by where you’re not completely in touch.
ACLU sues Kansas over law invalidating trans residents’ IDs
After layoffs at Advocate, parent company acquires ‘Them’ from Conde Nast
Spring into sold
Plan your wedding the LGBTQ way
Calendar: February 27-March 5
US Embassy in Mexico issues shelter in place order for Puerto Vallarta
Rob Jetten becomes first gay Dutch prime minister
More than a dozen LGBTQ athletes medal at Olympics
New book profiles LGBTQ Ukrainians, documents war experiences
PHOTOS: Queen of Hearts
-
Mexico5 days agoUS Embassy in Mexico issues shelter in place order for Puerto Vallarta
-
Netherlands4 days ago
Rob Jetten becomes first gay Dutch prime minister
-
Sports4 days ago
More than a dozen LGBTQ athletes medal at Olympics
-
Books3 days ago
New book profiles LGBTQ Ukrainians, documents war experiences
