a&e features
Salon Roi entrepreneur Roi Barnard reflects on five decades in business
Stylist recalls AIDS epidemic — and Marilyn’s calming presence
For some — perhaps gay men disproportionately — the draw of a grand staircase is irresistible. Especially if one has logged much time in square-footage-starved city quarters.
Roi Barnard looks proudly around his eponymous salon at the staircase and wall beside it decorated in images of Marilyn Monroe.
“Fifty years I’ve been walking that staircase like Carol Burnett,” he says. “The staircase first sold me on this location. The shop can be whatever you want it to be. It can be elegant because of the staircase. It’s unique and they’re disappearing.”
Barnard still works at Salon Roi, though he sold it 12 years ago and has recently cut back his hours since a heart attack. It celebrated its 50th anniversary in business at the same location this month (Aug. 9). Ten years in, the Marilyn mural was created. Now an official D.C. landmark, she’s about to be refurbished. Barnard is celebrating the milestone with the publication of his book “Mister, are you a Lady?” A documentary is also being planned.
Still, it’s Marilyn’s face just as much as his clients who continue to inspire him.
“I first saw her in ‘The Asphalt Jungle’ when I was 10,” he says after having his picture taken in front of her mural painted on his roof. “I remember thinking how sad she looked despite her smile. Like me back then. After she died, I wanted to bring her with me. Now she lives on here.”
For Barnard, the movie legend is more than a mere decorative element. He sometimes speaks of her as if she’s still around.
“We’re going out on the roof for a picture with Marilyn,” Barnard says as he’s halfway out the bathroom window. “Come join us.”
It’s hard to believe this nimble 81-year-old survived not only ’70s excesses, the ’80s AIDS crisis and various waves of conservatism, but also a recent heart attack. He says he did it with his salon and a little help from his friends.
“They’re my family,” Barnard says of his clients and staff. “And those who have been with me from the beginning, we’ve survived a lot. You can see it in their eyes.”
“I would say one part of the attraction of working here for me is not only the beauty of the building but also the family aspect,” says Zakiya St. Rose, a bisexual 28-year-old aesthetician at Salon Roi. “Everyone in my book (of clients) feels loved and cared for, and that’s a part of Roi’s legacy.”
Salon Roi, an upscale salon inside a cozy Woodley Park townhouse, began its life in 1969 as Charles the First, the unisex brainchild of Barnard and his former partner, Charles Stinson.
“We were co-owners and lovers,” Barnard says. “The late ’60s and early ’70s were so incredibly wild. Be glad you weren’t there then because you probably wouldn’t be here now. Times were that wild.”
While Barnard was in a stable relationship and didn’t do drugs, he did enjoy diamond earrings, long fur coats and driving a gold Rolls Royce to Studio 54 on weekends with Stinson. At discos, they would go out on the dance floor and throw up cards in the air granting one free haircut like cost-effective wishes.
“That’s how we got them in,” he says. “We had a big house off 16th street with a big Marilyn Monroe swimming pool. Charles and I were so public and so out there. I was just coming off a fashion modeling career and we were not afraid.”
Still, he remembered challenges, even from gay folks.
“Gay people were afraid of us back then. We had a better time in the straight community,” Barnard says, frowning. “The gay community liked us but were afraid of us because we were out and they could get fired back then, especially if they worked for the federal government.”
Barnard remembers those pre-Stonewall times when, ”We had to hide everything.”
He remembers paying to go to a private party to meet other gay men and a half-hour after he left, it was raided by police. Some of the men he knew had their names printed in the paper and “they were told not to come back to work. They lost everything.”
He and Stinson each married lesbians because, “that was what you did at the time.” But times changed and a taste of freedom led to men wanting more, both gay and straight.
“Half my clientele are straight men,” Barnard says. “They love being pampered. Before the ’60s and ’70s, men didn’t have much choice when they went to the barber. Then suddenly they had a lot more freedom in how to wear their hair. And one cookie leads to a whole box.”
This new desire for freedom led Barnard and Stinson to open a unisex salon. One goal was to spread the love to government workers. Their client lists grew from federal workers to senior officials.
“Why couldn’t we help both men and women?” Barnard says. “Hair is hair. But it caused quite a media frenzy at the time. You see, women went to beauty parlors and men went to barber shops and the twain shall not meet.”
So Barnard and Stinson bucked convention and opened their shop to everyone, but not without controversy.
Barnard recalls being a guest of Maury Povich on D.C.’s “Panorama” and being asked to name-drop his more exclusive clients. He refused. Later, the secretary of defense stopped by his salon to thank him personally. Barnard’s stylists took care of the secretary’s entire family and to this day he is proud to serve the grandchildren of the first children he styled.
“The children saved us,” he says, memories of the AIDS crisis giving him a haunted look.
The repression of the ’50s gave way to the freedom of the ’60s and the flamboyance of the ’70s, but the crisis of the ’80s threatened to take that all away.
“Everybody was scared,” Barnard says. “In those early days people were getting sick, a lot of people, and we didn’t know what was going on. People were losing their shops.”
He seemed unable to shake the fear of the time.
“We still have the same eyes. I can see the ravages of war in the eyes of the girls who survived it with me. I lost five gay male hairdressers — major hairdressers,” Barnard says. “They were up-and-comers. Rising stars. I was mentoring them to open their own shops one day because that is what you do. But then suddenly they got sick and were gone. All of them. Gone.”
He says what happened in his shop happened in many shops in many other cities all over the country. Barnard jokes that before the crisis the term “gay hairdresser” was redundant but afterward, women took control of the industry because they had to.
“We were hit hard in those days,” he says. “Robin Weir, who used to do Nancy Reagan’s hair, had a big salon on P Street. Maybe 25 or 30 hairdressers. He came to say goodbye. So many salons were closing and the owners coming to say goodbye to me.”
He describes how the crisis worsened and how salons started to look like hospital wards as sick stylists kept working despite losing their eyesight, getting tired and having to conceal blotches on their skin.
“No one knew they were dying back then,” Barnard says. “No one knew what was going on. They were just desperately trying to get through their day. You know when you get sick you think you’ll get better and that there is a better day coming, but it didn’t come. For some it never came.”
To help his business survive, Barnard had to make two tough decisions. One was to get an instructor’s license and train all the female assistants “to the once-pompous boys” to do hair.
“Not a single girl got sick,” Barnard says. “It was do that or lose the shop.”
The other was to leave Stinson and buy out his stake in the shop.
“I thought drugs were changing Charles,” Barnard says. “Not a brain tumor caused by AIDS.”
Stinson, Barnard says, was becoming increasingly unstable toward his staff, his clients and his partner. Barnard had to take action, though now older and post-heart surgery he looks back with regret.
“I should have taken him in,” he says looking around the nail room. “I could have let him work here while we watched over him and took care of him. We shouldn’t have left him alone.”
In those early days of the crisis, before Stinson knew he was sick, both he and Barnard were invited to Georgetown University to explain what they knew about gay life. The goal was to learn what about their “lifestyle” was filling the hospital wards with men who should be in the prime of their lives.
“Our secrets were killing us,” Barnard says. “So I told them. I told what I knew.”
Barnard and Stinson took straight but intellectually curious doctors to gay bars around town and told of back rooms where sketchy sex could be had easily “in pitch dark with five, 10 men.”
“At one bar a homeless man walked in off the street,” Barnard says, wrinkling his nose at the memory. “And right into that back room. Even if they couldn’t see him, which was a blessing, they had to be able to smell him, right?”
Barnard’s squeamishness may have saved his life.
He and Stinson introduced the doctors to Jim Graham, the director of a little walk-up clinic on 18th street called Whitman-Walker. Gay men frequented the clinic to treat “VD” or venereal diseases, now called STIs or sexually transmitted infections.
“Jim didn’t like me telling them our secrets,” Barnard says, shaking his head. “But they had to know. We were dying.”
Back rooms began to close, but Barnard felt he needed to do more so he took his styling scissors on the road. He started doing hair for sick young men to help them feel beautiful again. He also joined DIFA, the Designing Industry Fighting AIDS.
But like war nurses who suffer their own forms of PTSD, seeing the constant death began to take its toll.
“One of my beautiful young friends got sick,” Barnard says. “He had these purple spots all over his face. His flesh just hung from him. His skin …”
Barnard was there to cut his friend’s hair but, “I just couldn’t do it.”
“I excused myself to sit alone on his front porch and check in with myself asking, ‘Can I do this? God, please help me.’ I finally told him, ‘I think I’m OK now. I just need some water.’ He asked me, ‘I look that bad?’ And I said, ‘Oh buddy, yeah. Yeah, you do.’”
Barnard styled his hair and warned his friend to take a picture and send it to his family before inviting them out to see him.
Stinson’s condition deteriorated to the point where he wouldn’t last long. Barnard sent him to a friend connected with the Salk Institute for Biological Studies in California. Once known for developing a safe polio vaccine, the institute was now battling AIDS. Though well treated, Stinson would be experimented on before succumbing to the disease.
“Over 300 people came to his funeral,” Bernard says. “Kindness came through.”
As the public learned more about the disease and the death toll eased, business slowly recovered at Salon Roi.
“The fact that we were child-friendly saved us,” he says. “Our children in the ’80s didn’t know about AIDS. They were babies. They are still coming today with their babies.”
The business has now expanded with a spa and other services. Most of the staff still consists of women, but Barnard notes young gay men are returning to the field. Some of the old flair from the ’70s is starting to return as well.
“Now, there is a boy who works here and is extremely flamboyant,” Barnard says. “But he has no idea what we went through before. The lifestyle had to come way down because of the backlash due to the AIDS crisis. But we came through. We survived.”
a&e features
35 years after ‘Truth or Dare,’ Slam is still dancing
Salim Gauwloos on Madonna, HIV, and why he almost didn’t audition for Blond Ambition Tour
Most gay men of a certain age remember “the kiss.”
It was the moment Madonna’s dancers Salim Gauwloos and Gabriel Trupin locked lips in the hit 1991 documentary film “Truth or Dare,” which is celebrating its 35th anniversary this spring.
The kiss was hot, but what made it groundbreaking is that it appeared in a mainstream Hollywood movie that screened in suburban multiplexes across the country. This wasn’t an obscure art house film. The movie, and tour on which it was based, received months of breathless media attention all over the world for bold expressions of female empowerment and queer visibility. Madonna was threatened with arrest in Toronto for simulating masturbation on stage and Pope John Paul II urged Catholics to boycott the show, triggering a media firestorm.
“Truth or Dare” was billed as a behind-the-scenes documentary of the tour, but it quickly became clear that the real star of the show wasn’t Madonna, but rather her colorful troupe of seven backup dancers, six of whom identified as gay: Kevin Stea, Carlton Wilborn, Luis Xtravaganza Camacho, Jose Gutierez Xtravaganza, Gauwloos, and Trupin; Oliver Crumes III identifies as straight.
We saw them party and march in the New York City Pride parade. They were unabashedly queer at a dangerous time — before protease inhibitors began to stem the AIDS plague and before most celebrities and politicians embraced the gay community in any real way. Being out in 1991 carried major risks to career and reputation.
Enter Gauwloos, one of those brave dancers who vogued his way into the hearts of countless gay men entranced by his handsome looks, his stage presence, and dance skills.
Gauwloos — known then and now as “Slam”— sat down with the Blade to talk Madonna, the lasting impact of “Truth or Dare,” the public disclosure of his HIV status, and plans for a new book on his life.
His story is fascinating — from growing up in Europe to dancing in New York to landing the gig of a lifetime with Madonna. He performed on that tour while secretly HIV positive and went without medical treatment for 10 years because he was living in the United States as an undocumented immigrant. Not even Madonna knew of his HIV status. Two other dancers on the tour were also HIV positive but no one talked about it. Ironically, Madonna was singing “Express Yourself” and advocating for condom use during her concerts yet backstage three of her dancers were secretly positive.
“A lot of people were dying so I wasn’t going to tell Madonna I had HIV,” said Slam, now 57. “And the others didn’t either. It wasn’t the moment to do it. She used to make speeches about Keith Haring and AIDS and I thought it’s going to be me next.”
Gabriel Trupin died of AIDS in 1995. Slam was diagnosed at age 18 in 1987, a frightening time when a positive test result often meant a death sentence. He booked the “Blond Ambition Tour” at age 21 after moving to New York. His friends encouraged him to audition but Slam resisted because he wasn’t a big Madonna fan.
“It was crazy, everyone wanted that job,” he said, “but I wanted to dance with Janet Jackson and Paula Abdul.” He listened to his friends and shortly after the audition, Slam received a call from Madonna herself inviting him to join the tour.
“We all wanted to be stars but not even Madonna knew how big that tour would become. The way it was choreographed and directed, the stars aligned. … It never looks dated even today.”
The world tour kicked off in Japan in April 1990 then moved to the United States and Europe, stirring controversy wherever it went. There was the iconic cone bra; the aforementioned simulated masturbation during “Like a Virgin”; and religious imagery that offended many Catholic groups and the Vatican.
And the controversy didn’t end with the tour. Cameras were rolling throughout the tour for what Slam thought would be a “video memory” for Madonna. But as the tour unfolded, director Alek Keshishian reportedly became more interested in what was happening behind the scenes so plans for mere tour footage were expanded into a full documentary.
“We were young and partying and didn’t really know what was going on,” Slam said. “You live in this celebrity bubble and you sign a paper – I don’t even know what I signed.”
In 1992, Kevin, Oliver, and Gabriel sued Madonna for invasion of privacy and fraud claiming she used some footage without their consent. They claim they were told nothing would be included in the film that they didn’t want to be seen. In one specific incident, Gabriel alleged that he told producers he didn’t want the scene of him kissing Slam to be in the film as he wasn’t fully out.
“Gabriel was forcibly outed,” in the movie, Kevin said in a 2016 interview.
Slam did not join his colleagues in the lawsuit.
“I couldn’t sue because I was illegal but I wasn’t ever going to sue,” Slam said. “I’m not a suing kind of person. But good for them, they fought for it and won. A lot of people don’t have the balls to sue Madonna.” The suit was settled two years later for an undisclosed sum.
“We were all conflicted about the kiss,” he said with a laugh. “The kiss, oh my God, my boyfriend is going to kill me! Belgian stress!”
Beyond worrying about his boyfriend’s reaction, Slam had concerns about the impact of being openly gay on his modeling career.
“In 1990, you couldn’t get high fashion campaigns as an openly gay model,” he said. “I was worried about that. I couldn’t get a campaign because I was gay. My agency told me to say I was straight and it was just a game.”
In 2016, pegged to the 25th anniversary of “Truth or Dare,” the surviving six dancers filmed a documentary about their lives post-Madonna titled “Strike A Pose.” In it, Slam publicly revealed his HIV status for the first time in an emotional scene with his former colleagues.
“I found the strength to tell the world I have HIV,” he recalls. “I was scared but I felt brave. The outcome and messages were beautiful. After I saw ‘Strike A Pose,’ I knew we gave people hope. And not just for gay people.”
He was infected in 1987 but didn’t get treated until 1997. After the tour ended, he said he went into a depression and his agency dropped him.
“I was partying too much after the tour,” he recalls. “I made a decision to live as an illegal alien.” In 1997, Slam collapsed and was rushed to the hospital with pneumonia.
“They started treating me and thank God the new HIV drugs were out, the cocktails, it took me a couple months to get better.”
Madonna didn’t participate in “Strike A Pose” and Slam said he hasn’t seen or spoken to her since the end of the tour. He said he had no idea of the impact “Truth or Dare” would have.
“You look at this movie in 1991 and you don’t think it’s going to be such a big thing and 35 years later it’s still helping people,” he said. “It was helpful for people who felt alone at that time. It was such an important documentary.
“I don’t think younger gay people realize how important Madonna was to gay and queer visibility — she was a big part of it. We showed the world it’s OK to be gay and that was the great message of this movie.”
He noted that, decades later, many of his friends have transgender kids and that queer culture is represented in much of mainstream pop culture.
“It’s amazing how far we’ve come,” he said. “I know we’ll always be marginalized but we have come so far. I’m really proud of our community. The current nightmare will be over and I do believe that things will get better.”
Referencing President Trump’s attacks on the LGBTQ community and crackdown on immigration, Slam described the situation in the U.S. today as “sad.”
“Everything is such a mess,” he said. “Some of these people have lived here 30-40 years and they take you out of your home. I can’t even imagine. It breaks my heart. When I was illegal it was a different story.”
Slam met his husband, Facundo Gabba, who’s from Argentina, in 2000, and he helped him get a legal case together to win citizenship. He filed a case in 2001 and was told there was a 99 percent chance he wouldn’t be permitted to stay in the United States because they weren’t allowing HIV-positive immigrants to remain in the country. But he got his green card anyway in 2005 and became a U.S. citizen in 2012.
Today, Slam and Gabba live in Brooklyn, though they travel a lot because “I can’t take the cold.” The couple married in Argentina in 2010 and in the U.S. in 2016.
Slam is still dancing and working as a choreographer. He’s teaching at a contemporary dance festival in Vienna in July and even offers online lessons via Salimdans.com.
As a longtime HIV survivor, Slam is dedicated to a healthful lifestyle.
“You have to keep moving; when you move you stay healthy,” he says. “Dance heals everything. I do yoga, I eat healthy and clean as possible. I don’t watch much TV … I try to stay healthy and positive. If I absorb all of the negativity I would be sick.”
In addition to his ongoing work in dance and choreography, Slam is in the early stages of writing a book about his extraordinary life and pioneering career.
“I always knew I had a book inside of me. I want to talk about my HIV status. I know I can inspire more people. I want to tell even more secrets in the book; secrets are a poison so I want to tell everything.”
Among those secrets, he notes, is a desire to write about his strict Muslim father and the years he spent as an undocumented immigrant in America.
“Those are the things I want to talk about, the struggles. It’s a love story, hope and resilience. I know it will help people.”
As for his friends from the tour, Slam says he remains in contact with Gabriel’s mother and José Xtravaganza is his best friend. Baltimore’s Center Stage theater is currently developing a new musical about Xtravaganza’s life. And Slam said he occasionally talks to Oliver, though “he still can’t pronounce Sandra Bernhard’s name.”
At the end of our interview, Slam indulged a round a rapid fire questions:
• Favorite song to perform in the “Blond Ambition” tour? “Express Yourself.”
• Aside from Madonna, who was your favorite artist you worked with? Toni Braxton in “Aida” on Broadway.
• Favorite Madonna song? “Live to Tell”
• Favorite Madonna video? “Bedtime Stories”
• What’s more stressful: performing in a concert or performing on the VMAs? “Both, because we always had to be perfect.”
• Did you go to Madonna’s recent “Celebration” tour? “I didn’t see the show but I saw clips online.”
• What do you remember most about performing “Vogue” at the VMAs? “It was nerve-racking for them to flip those fans.”
• When was the last time you vogued? “I teach classes so a couple weeks ago.”
a&e features
Transmission DC breathes new life into a storied sound space
A fresh home for boundary-pushing culture on H Street
Late last year, phoenix-style, a fresh home for boundary-pushing culture arose on the H Street corridor. Transmission DC – a queer, trans, and POC-owned, operated, and centered community-focused venue – powered on in the former home to the Rock & Roll Hotel (famously, not a hotel, but very much rock & roll). Transmission (1353 H St., N.E.) arrives secure in its mandate – or even birthright – to provide a place to celebrate creativity and music through a lens of inclusivity and respect.
Transmission’s team brings experience, but also representation. Owners/partners Kabir Khanna (who is also programming director), Ellie McDyre, and Kelli Kerrigan together previously managed 618, a venue in Chinatown, crafting “some of D.C.’s freakiest parties, raves, and mosh pits” they note.
They packed up operations last fall to a space curated specifically for D.C.’s underground music and culture scene, building their efforts in Chinatown to bring in more fans in queer and POC circles.
Transmission, Khanna points out, is built on DIY values. In the music scene, DIY means that promoters and organizers – often disconnected from the mainstream and part of marginalized communities – build shows and programs collaboratively, but independently from institutions, supporting each other as smaller, independent venues close. Here, Transmission aims to ensure that those putting together these underground inclusive shows have a more permanent and stable home, can have access to resources, and can provide more sustainable income to artists. “We’re trying to get more people to support and enjoy the music, and also give artists and organizers within the DIY community more structure and a larger cut,” says Khanna.
Khanna also notes that Transmission operates “under the principles of safety, inclusivity, and respect.” McDyre added that even at venues that claim inclusivity, that statement might not take place in practice. We’re “not just putting up a rainbow flag,” says McDyre, but as some of the owners are trans and POC, audiences can see themselves reflected at the top.
Much like the DIY nature of the music community, the Transmission owners brought a DIY ethos to turning around their space.
In March 2020 – the height of COVID lockdowns – Rock & Roll Hotel suddenly shuttered, though not due to the pandemic; instead, the venue claimed that decreasing sales and increasing competition led to the closure. For 14 years, it was the central spot for cheap beer and lesser-known and celebrated acts. The space stood vacant for more than five years, until Transmission turned the power back on.
“When we got into the space, it was effectively abandoned for years,” says Khanna. “There was a ton of mold, and paint primer covering all surfaces. It was nearly falling apart.” Khanna noted that many music venues like this one, regardless of how well it was maintained, “get the shit kicked out of it,” given the nature of shows. The team called in mold removal contractors, ripped up most of the floorboards, and started fresh.
Transmission’s first floor is styled as a stripped-down black box: the better to take in the music. “It’s minimal on purpose to act as a canvas for set design and music,” without a specific aesthetic, says Khanna. Moving upstairs, the second floor has been opened up, removing some walls, and now has a larger dance area than the first floor. Beyond the first two performance levels, and a holdover from Rock & Roll Hotel, is the rooftop. Though without a stage, the rooftop space is filled with murals splashed across the walls, with a full bar. Transmission’s current capacity is 496, but the team is looking to grow that number. Transmission will also leverage the full kitchen that Rock & Roll Hotel operated, bringing in Third Hand Kitchen to offer a variety of food, including vegan and vegetarian options.
Khanna pointed out an upcoming show reflective of Transmission’s inclusive ethos: Black Techo Matters on Feb. 27. The event is set to be “a dynamic, collaborative night of underground electronic music celebrating Black History Month.” Khanna says that techno came from Black music origins, and this event will celebrate this genesis with a host of artists, including DJ Stingray 313, Carlos Souffront, and Femanyst.
a&e features
Meet D.C.’s Most Eligible Queer Singles
Our annual report, just in time for Valentine’s Day
Just in time for Valentine’s Day, the Blade is happy to present our annual Most Eligible Singles issue. The Singles were chosen by you, our readers, in an online nominations process.
John Marsh
Age: 35
Occupation: DJ and Drag Entertainer
How do you identify? Male
What are you looking for in a mate? I’m looking for someone who’s ready to dive into life’s adventures with me. someone independent and building their own successes, but equally open to supporting each other’s dreams along the way. I know that probably sounds simple because, honestly, who isn’t looking for that? But my life and career keep me very social and busy, so it’s important to me to build trust with someone who understands that. I want a partner who knows that even when life gets hectic or I’m getting a lot of attention through my work in the community, it doesn’t take away from my desire to build something real, intentional, and meaningful with the right person.
Biggest turn off: My biggest turnoff is arrogance or judgment toward others. I’m most drawn to people who are comfortable being themselves and who treat everyone with the same level of respect and care. I’ve worked hard for the success I’ve found, but I believe in staying humble and leading with kindness, and I’m attracted to people who live the same way. I’m also turned off by exclusionary mindsets, especially the idea that sapphic folks don’t belong in gay spaces. Our community is vibrant, diverse, and strongest when it’s shared with everyone who shows up with respect and love
Biggest turn on: I’m drawn to people who can confidently walk into new spaces and create connection. Being able to read a room and make others feel comfortable shows emotional intelligence and empathy, which I find incredibly attractive. I also come from a very social, open, and welcoming family environment, so being with someone who embraces community and enjoys bringing people together is really important to me.
Hobbies: I have a lot of hobbies and love staying creative and curious. I’m a great cook, so you’ll never have to worry about going hungry around me. In my downtime, I watch a lot of anime and I will absolutely talk your ear off about my favorites if you let me. I’m also a huge music fan and K-pop lover (listen to XG!), and I’m a musician who plays the cello. I spend a lot of time sewing as well, which is a big part of my creative expression. My hobbies can be a little all over the place, but I just genuinely love learning new skills and trying new things whenever I can.
What is your biggest goal for 2026? This year feels like a huge milestone for me. I’m getting ready to join a tour this summer and want to represent myself well while building meaningful connections in every city I perform in. I’m also focused on growing as a DJ, sharing more mixes and content online, and reaching a big creative goal of releasing original music that I’m producing.
Pets, Kids or Neither? I have a lovely Akita named Grady that I’ve had for 10 years and always want pets in my life. I’m open to kids when/if the time is right with the right person.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from yours? Hell no. I don’t see political differences as just policy disagreements anymore – they often reflect deeper values about how we treat people and support our communities. I’m very progressive in my beliefs, and I’m looking for a partner who shares that mindset. For me, alignment in values like equity, compassion, and social responsibility is non-negotiable in a relationship. To be very clear about my beliefs, I’m outspoken about my opposition to immigration enforcement systems like ICE and believe both political parties have contributed to policies that have caused real harm to vulnerable communities. I’m also deeply disturbed by the ongoing violence in Palestine and believe we need to seriously examine our support of military actions that have resulted in the loss of countless innocent lives. These aren’t abstract political opinions for me, they are moral issues that directly inform who I am and what I stand for.
Celebrity crush: Cocona
Name one obscure fact about yourself: I used to own a catering business in college that paid for my school — I also went to a Christian college, lol.
Jackie Zais
Age: 35
Occupation: Senior director at nonprofit
How do you identify? Lesbian woman
What are you looking for in a mate? Looking for someone who’s curious about the world and the people in it — the kind of person who’s down to explore a new spot one night and stay in with takeout the next. Confident in who they are, social without being exhausting, adventurous but grounded, thoughtful but not pretentious. Someone who can be funny while still taking life (and relationships) seriously.
Biggest turn off: Doesn’t have strong opinions. I love hearing a wild hot take.
Biggest turn on: When someone can make me belly laugh.
Hobbies: Number one will always be yapping with friends over food, but I also love collecting new hobbies. Currently, I crochet (and have some dapper sweater vests as a result), listen to audiobooks on what I personally think is a normal speed (2x) and play soccer and pickleball. But I’ve tried embroidery, papier-mâché, collaging, collecting plants, scrap booking, and mosaic.
What is your biggest goal for 2026? I’ve recently started swimming and I want to look less like a flailing fish and more like someone who knows what they’re doing.
Pets, Kids or Neither? I have neither but open to kids
Would you date someone whose political views differ from yours? My best friend is a moderate Democrat and that’s as far right as I’m willing to go.
Celebrity crush: Tobin Heath
Name one obscure fact about yourself: I’m the daughter of Little Miss North Quincy 1967.
Kevin Schultz
Age: 39
Occupation: Product manager
How do you identify? Gay
What are you looking for in a mate? You know 2001’s hottest Janet Jackson single, “Someone to Call My Lover?” To quote Janet, “Maybe, we’ll meet at a bar, He’ll drive a funky car; Maybe, we’ll meet at a club, And fall so deeply in love.”
Realistically though, I’d love to find someone who loves to walk everywhere and who avoids the club because it’s too loud and crowded. Later in the song, our songstress opines “My, my, looking for a guy, guy, I don’t want him too shy; But he’s gotta have the qualities, That I like in a man: Strong, smart, affectionate” and I’m quite aligned there – I’m an introvert looking for someone more extroverted.
I’m looking for someone who is different from me. When the math works, one plus one should equal two. Two becoming one is more art, and my relational approach is more science, or, I guess, math.
Biggest turn off: I’m turned off by a lot of superficially small things — chewing with one’s mouth open, dirty or untrimmed fingernails, oh, and also, lack of self awareness. My personal brand of anxiety is hyper self-aware, so I’m very turned off by someone who doesn’t realize that they exist in the world with others.
Biggest turn on: Competency. Or maybe…eyes? So perhaps, you see my conundrum — I’m very engaged by people who are deeply engaged by something, but I’d be lying if I said a sharp gaze and a wink didn’t get me. And, you know, some stamina in all avenues, mental and physical doesn’t hurt either.
Hobbies: Fixing everyone’s WiFi (this did actually get me a date once), and just generally fixing everyone’s everything. If it’s got a plug, screen, or buttons I can probably help you with it. On my own, I’m really into smart home devices and automation, and just to be timely, my latest thing is setting up and tuning my own instance of OpenClaw. (No one should actually do this, which is why I’m trying.) Together, we could also explore such hobbies as visiting every Metro station, visiting and exploring a new airport, and exploring why there are so many gay transit nerds. There’s no non-fake sounding way to say this but I also just love knowledge seeking, so I’d also love to go on an adventure with you where we learn something brand new.
What is your biggest goal for 2026? My biggest goal is to arrive to 2027 just a little better than I arrived to 2026. A few gym goals, a few personal goals, a few work goals; I hope to get a few of them across the finish line. At the risk of holding myself accountable, one of those goals is to be able to flawlessly side plank for over a minute. Please don’t mistake me for a huge gym rat; I just have a questionable relationship with balance and I’m really working on it.
Pets, Kids or Neither? I’ll just be blunt: no pets. Stating this on my Hinge profile resulted in an exponential loss of matches, so it’s very fun to trot out the idea. Primarily, I’m allergic to cats and dogs so my aversion is mostly biological. I’m not, however, allergic to kids — big fan of my various nieces and nephews — but I’d really only consider kids of my own if my chosen companion and I could financially afford them without compromise, and at this age I’ve become opinionated about the life I want to live.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from yours? No. This becomes a simpler answer with each passing day, unfortunately.
Celebrity crush: If I’m being of the moment, of course, it’s going to be one of the gentlemen on “Heated Rivalry,” but if I were to really dig into the archives it would be pre-Star Trek Chris Pine. I first saw him in an absolute train wreck of a movie called “Blind Dating” where he plays a blind guy who tries to pretend to be sighted in order to date. The movie was terrible, but I found him irresistible.
Name one obscure fact about yourself: I went suddenly deaf on one side only (my left) just before my 33rd birthday. After a bit of time in the wilderness (metaphorically) I got a cochlear implant a few years later, and it really changed my life. I will talk until someone stops me about hearing, sound, and the amazing arena of hearing loss technology. A lot of people, when they see my implant, assume I was born with hearing loss, so it’s always a bit odd (obscure even!) when I tell people I lost it as an adult. But, I also got my hearing back as an adult and am an eager advocate for assistive technology and visibility for people with disabilities that are not always immediately visible. I also work with prospective adult implant candidates to determine if an implant is right for them, because losing hearing suddenly as an adult is isolating and it’s helpful to talk to someone who’s been there.
Gabriel Acevero
Age: 35
Occupation: Maryland State Delegate
How do you identify? Gay
What are you looking for in a mate? Emotional intelligence and a sense of humor.
Biggest turn off: Fetishization.
Biggest turn on: Kindness and emotional intelligence.
Hobbies: Traveling and reading (I love books).
What is your biggest goal for 2026? More self care. I love what I do but it can also be physically taxing. In 2026, I’m prioritizing more self care.
Pets, Kids or Neither? I have neither but I’m open to both.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from yours? No.
Celebrity crush: Kofi Siriboe
Name one obscure fact about yourself: I’m a Scorpio who was raised by a Scorpio and I have many Scorpios in my life.
Vida Rangel
Age: 36
Occupation: Public Servant, Community Organizer
How do you identify? I am a queer transLatina
What are you looking for in a mate? I’m looking for a partner who is caring, socially aware, and passionate about meaningfully improving some part of this world we all live in. Ideally someone playful who can match my mischievous energy, will sing and dance with me whenever joy finds us, and will meet me at protests and community meetings when the moment calls for bold collective action.
Biggest turn off: Ego. Confidence can be cute, but humility is sexy.
Biggest turn on: Drive. Seeing someone put their heart into pursuing their goals is captivating. Let’s chase our dreams together!
Hobbies: Music in all its forms (karaoke, playing guitar, concerts, musicals…), finding reasons to travel to new places, and making (Mexican) tamales for friends and coworkers.
What is your biggest goal for 2026? My biggest goal for 2026 is to organize and a celebratory kiss on election night wouldn’t hurt.
Pets, Kids or Neither? An adorable black cat named Rio (short for Misterio)
Would you date someone whose political views differ from yours? Ma’am? If you feel the need to ask…
Celebrity crush: Mi amor, Benito Bad Bunny. Zohran Mamdani, too. I have lots of love to give.
Name one obscure fact about yourself: I worked at Chick-fil-A when I was in high school and was fired after just three months. At the time it was still legal to fire someone for being trans, but I’m pretty sure it was because I called out to go to a Halloween party.
Em Moses
Age: 34
Occupation: Publishing
How do you identify? Queer
What are you looking for in a mate? Companionship, passion, fun. I seek a confident partner who inspires me, someone to laugh and dance with, someone with a rich internal universe of interests and experiences to build upon. A lifelong friend.
Biggest turn off: Dishonesty.
Biggest turn on: I love when someone is exactly themselves, nurturing their passions and skills and showing up uniquely in this world as only they can.
Hobbies: I love to read. I create art with my hands. When the weather is nice I’m outside, walking around the District looking at flowers and trees.
What is your biggest goal for 2026? My main goal this year is to spend more time with my nieces and nephews.
Pets, Kids or Neither? No pets or children in my life currently.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from yours? While I consider myself quite openminded and genuinely enjoy learning from perspectives different from my own, I have clear boundaries around my morals and those pillars do not fall.
Celebrity crush: Luigi Mangione
Name one obscure fact about yourself: My first job was at a donut shop.
Nate Wong
Age: 41
Occupation: Strategy adviser to nonprofits and philanthropists to help ambitious ideas turn into meaningful, positive societal impact.
How do you identify? Gay (he/him)
What are you looking for in a mate? An additive partner: sociable, adventurous, and curious about the world. I’m drawn to warmth, openness, and people who show up fully — one-on-one and in community. If you enjoy a good dinner party, make eye contact, and actually talk to strangers (I know a D.C. no-no), we’ll get along just fine.
Biggest turn off: Not being present. Active listening matters to me; attention is a form of respect (and honestly, very attractive). And a picky food eater (how will we some day be joint food-critics?).
Biggest turn on: Curiosity, adventuresome spirit, and someone who can hold their own in a room — and still make others feel at ease. Confidence is best when it’s generous.
Hobbies: Splitting my time between the ceramics studio (District Clay), planning the next trip, and finding great food spots. I box to balance it all out, and I love curating small, adventurous gatherings that bring interesting people together — the kind where you stay later than planned.
What is your biggest goal for 2026? The last few years threw some curve balls. So 2026 is all about moving forward more freely and passionately, trusting what feels right and following it with intention (and joy).
Pets, Kids or Neither? Open to kids (in a variety of forms — already have some adorable god kids). A hypoallergenic dog would absolutely raise the cuddle quotient; cats are best admired from a respectful, allergy-safe distance.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from yours? I value thoughtful listening and sincere debate; shared values around the honoring of everyone’s humanity, equity, and justice matter to me and aren’t up for debate.
Celebrity crush: Bad Bunny style with Jason Momoa humble confidence (harking to my Hawaiian roots) and Idris Elba charm — range matters.
Name one obscure fact about yourself: I celebrated medical clearance by going surfing in El Salvador. I’ve also nearly been arrested in Mozambique and somehow walked away unscathed (and without complying with a bribe) — happy to explain over an excursion.
Diane D’Costa
Age: 29
Occupation: Artist + Designer
How do you identify? Queer/lesbian
What are you looking for in a mate? A cuddle buddy, a fellow jet setter, a muse! Someone to light my soul on fire (in a good way).
Biggest turn off: Apathy. I care deeply about a lot of things and need someone with a similar curiosity and zest for life.
Biggest turn on: Mutuality really does it for me — a push and pull, someone who will throw it back and also catch it. I love someone who takes initiative, shows care and compassion, and expresses fluidity and confidence.
Hobbies: You can find me throwing pottery, painting, sipping natural wine, supporting local coffee shops, and most definitely tearing up a QTBIPOC dance floor.
What is your biggest goal for 2026? Producing my first solo art show. This year I’m really leaning into actualizing all my visions and dreams and putting them out into the world.
Pets, Kids or Neither? I’ve got a Black Lab named Lennox after the one and only D.C. icon, Ari Lennox. I love supporting the youth and (made a career out of it), but don’t necessarily need to have little ones of my own.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from yours? No. Values alignment is key, but if you wanna get into the nuances of how we actualize collective liberation let’s get into it.
Celebrity crush: Queen Latifah
Name one obscure fact about yourself: I’m in the “Renaissance” movie. I know, I know slight flex… but “Crazy In Love” bottom left corner for a split second and a harsh crop, but I’m in there. “You are the visuals, baby” really hit home for me.
Donna Marie Alexander
Age: 67
Occupation: Social Worker
How do you identify? Lesbian
What are you looking for in a mate? Looking for a smart, kind, emotionally grown woman who knows who she is and is ready for real companionship. Also, great discernment and a good lesbian processor. Bonus points if you’ll watch a game with me— or at least cheer when I do. Extra bonus if you already know that women’s sports matter.
Ideal first date: Out for tea or a Lemon Drop that turns into dinner, great conversation, and a few laughs. Low drama, high warmth.
Must haves: A sense of humor, curiosity about the self, curiosity about me, and curiosity about the world. An independence, and an appreciation for loyalty—on and off the field. Dealbreaker: Anyone who thinks “it’s just a game.”
Biggest turn off: Self-centered and a lack of discernment.
Biggest turn on: Great conversation and a sense of humor.
Hobbies: Watching the Commanders game
What is your biggest goal for 2026? Self-growth and meeting an amazing friend.
Pets, Kids or Neither? I have two kids and grandkids.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from yours? No
Celebrity crush: Pam Grier
Name one obscure fact about yourself: She’s way more superstitious about game-day routines than she lets on
Joe Reberkenny
Age: 24
Occupation: Journalist
How do you identify? Gay
What are you looking for in a mate? Someone who’s driven, flexible, and independent. I’m a full-time journalist so if there’s news happening, I’ve gotta be ready to cover breaking stories. I’m looking for someone who also has drive in their respective career and is always looking to the future. I need someone who gets along with my friends. My friends and community here are so important to me and I’m looking for someone who can join me in my adventures and enjoys social situations.
Biggest turn off: Insecurity and cocky men. Guys who can’t kiki with the girls. Early bedtimes.
Biggest turn on: Traits: Emotional stability and reliability. A certain sense of safety and trust. Someone organized and open to trying new things. Physical: Taller than I am (not hard to do at 5’7″) but also a preference for hairy men (lol). Someone who can cook (I am a vegetarian/occasional pescatarian and while it’s not a requirement for me in a partner it would need to be something they can accommodate).
Hobbies: Exploring D.C. — from museums to nightlife, reading (particularly interested in queer history), dancing, frolicking, playing bartender, listening to music (preferably pop), classic movie connoisseur (TCM all the way).
What is your biggest goal for 2026? Continue my work covering LGBTQ issues related to the federal government, uplift queer voices, see mother monster (Lady Gaga) in concert.
Pets, Kids or Neither? I’ve got neither but I love a pet.
Would you date someone whose political views differ from yours? No
Celebrity crush: Pedro Pascal
Name one obscure fact about yourself: I’ve been hit by multiple cars and I have a twin sister.
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