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QUEERY: Lynne Barstow

The Congressional Chorus alto answers 20 gay questions

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Lynne Barstow, gay news, Washington Blade

Lynne Barstow (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

Singing comes naturally for Lynne Barstow and before joining Congressional Chorus, she sang exclusively in LGBT choirs.

She met her partner of 22 years, Leslie Pionke, in a gay chorus in Los Angeles and joined the Lesbian and Gay Chorus of Washington “before our boxes were even unpacked,” upon moving here 20 years ago.

“For us, it was the best way to meet people and become active in our community,” the 58-year-old Los Angeles native says. “For many years we performed in the Capitol Hill Arts Workshop’s annual Gilbert & Sullivan productions. Now the Congressional Chorus is my choral home and I have 80 new friends, gay and straight, who share the joy of performing a wide variety of music. I am constantly in awe of the talent that surrounds me.”

Congressional Chorus opens its 32nd season on Sunday, Nov. 18 at 4:30 p.m. at Church of the Epiphany (1317 G St., N.W.) with “Poets, Painters & Dreams: an afternoon of music and dance inspired by Marc Chagall, Sara Teasdale & Langston Hughes.” The chorus will be joined by dancers from the Joy of Motion Dance Center.

“It will lift the audience into a musical dreamscape we could all use right now in these overly plugged-in political times,” Barstow says. “Turn off CNN and spend an afternoon instead with the love poems of Sara Teasdale and the fanciful imagery of artist Marc Chagall.”

Barstow, who sings second alto, says her favorite piece on the program is “Dreams,” composed by Chorus accompanist Chris Urquiaga.

All three composers will be in attendance. Tickets are $32-39 ($19 for students). Upcoming concerts in 2019 are slated for March 23 (“Jazz Hot!”), June 1 (“Let Justice Roll”) and July 3 (“Civil Rights Concert Tour”). Details at congressionalchorus.org.

When she’s not singing, Barstow works as a flight attendant for Delta Airlines. She flies to Europe weekly with Delta and moved to Washington after “a very persuasive woman I met in a lesbian bar on a layover almost 30 years ago convinced me D.C. was the best city on the East Coast.”

They live in Capitol Hill with daughter Ryanne. Barstow enjoys travel, long bike rides, “pretending to” play the banjo and “keeping up with my German and Russian language skills” in her free time.

 

How long have you been out and who was the hardest person to tell?

I came out at age 24. No guilt, no hesitation, just elated to tell my parents I had fallen in love. The fact that “she” was not a “he” seemed a minor detail to me. After all, my uncle was gay and we all loved him. If they struggled with my news, they never showed it or attempted to sway me otherwise. Hardest person to tell? My 14-year-old sister, who was mostly concerned I would never be a mother. Read on.

 

Who’s your LGBT hero?

My newest LGBT hero just stepped out of Kansas last week and into Congress. Watch out, America! Sharice Davids, Native American and lesbian, is in the House!

 

What’s Washington’s best nightspot, past or present? 

Alas, the Phase and the Banana Cafe here on Capitol Hill are now history, but rather than sit home reading the Gay Bar obits, I think I’ll surprise my partner with a Saturday date night at Cobalt. (I know about it, because I just Googled it.)

 

Describe your dream wedding.

My idea of a dream wedding would be going to someone else’s dream wedding. Even though I consider myself a romantic and cheer our right to marry, I’m also a Sagittarian. The only aisle I’ll most likely ever walk down in this life will be on a Boeing 767.

 

What non-LGBT issue are you most passionate about?

My family would tell you I’m out to save the planet one straw and plastic bag at a time. It’s easy to stress over the minutia of recycling, but the big picture is we do need to become more aware of protecting vulnerable marine life and our oceans. Don’t get me started on to-go cups and polystyrene containers!

 

What historical outcome would you change?

If only those 19 men had decided the night before to take a reflective nature walk under a starry September sky, they might not have ever boarded those planes.

 

What’s been the most memorable pop culture moment of your lifetime?

My first girlfriend and I lived in Santa Monica in 1995 and became obsessed with the O.J. Simpson trial. We went downtown to the courtroom three times to watch the proceedings and see who we would run into in the ladies room. I still have a drawing that the court sketch artist signed and gave to me.

 

On what do you insist?

The list is long, yet I will narrow it down to these: kindness, reading, exercise, your headphones being off when I talk to you. And, oh, would it be too much to insist on a POTUS who respects core American values?

 

What was your last Facebook post or Tweet?

The day before the midterms, I posted the flyer to our upcoming Congressional Chorus concert: Poets, Painters and Dreams. “Make your voice heard Nov. 6th and we’ll make our voices heard Nov. 18th!”

 

If your life were a book, what would the title be?

My life published in two volumes: Volume I: “Ready For Take-off!” Volume II: “Just Landed. It’s Good To Be Home.”

 

If science discovered a way to change sexual orientation, what would you do?

Don’t fact check me, but I feel quite confident that an impressive number of LGBT scientists employed in genetic research would never allow this to happen. As a back-up plan, however, I would enlist every PFLAG chapter across the country (led by Betty DeGeneres) to march wherever our proud mothers and fathers are needed to change minds.

 

What do you believe in beyond the physical world? 

I’m a student of “A Course In Miracles.” I believe a shift in perception from fear to love will awaken us to God, our authentic selves and ultimately to inner peace. Our souls are eternal; our bodies a suit of clothes we take off at the end of our earthly journey.

 

What’s your advice for LGBT movement leaders?

Please share the resources we have here in D.C. with towns and cities across America. Whitman-Walker’s Insemination Support Group helped us realize our dream of motherhood. Rainbow Families, a few years later, introduced us to families who looked like ours. At the Rainbow Family Conference in May, our daughter, Ryanne (13), spent the entire day with the Teen Group and never once rolled her eyes. In fact, she loved it. These services are indispensable.

 

What would you walk across hot coals for?

I would crawl across hot coals to eradicate the reckless, tragic use of guns in our culture and heal the fear and hate behind every pulled trigger.

 

What LGBT stereotype annoys you most?

I hear there are folks in this country who feel LGBT people are unfit to be parents. That is annoying. Apparently they haven’t met the dozens of loving, stable same-sex families we have had the good fortune to know across the DMV.

 

What’s your favorite LGBT movie?

Hands down, the movie that came out the year I did — “Desert Hearts.” If you start me thinking about that motel scene, I might not be able to finish this interview.

 

What’s the most overrated social custom?

Anything that involves men, beer and elite college parties. I hear this combination can sometimes lead to a lot of trouble down the road.

 

What trophy or prize do you most covet?

Time to reveal my reality TV addiction. I would covet the chance to outwit, outplay and outlast my ridiculously buff, good-looking teammates to earn the title of sole “Survivor.” It would make my mother and daughter endlessly proud. My partner? She would be too busy watching “Downton Abbey” to notice.

 

What do you wish you’d known at 18?

At 18, I wish I had known how much I’d miss my grandparents after they died. All the questions I would never get to ask them, the stories left untold. Every person is a living library, they say. Don’t be so busy, young person, that you forget to check out these most valuable books right in your own family.

 

Why Washington?

Remember that persuasive woman I met in the lesbian bar 30 years ago? After she introduced me to Kramer’s Books and Afterwords Cafe, there was no way I was going to move to New York!

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Tickets on sale for chef Patrick O’Connell’s book launch event

Sept. 18 kickoff to feature José Andrés, Tom Sietsema

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Acclaimed chef Patrick O’Connell is preparing to publish his new memoir, “Main, Middle & Gay” in September and he’s launching the book with an event on Sept. 18 at 6 p.m. at Lisner Auditorium featuring Chef José Andrés and former Washington Post food critic Tom Sietsema.

Tickets for the event go on sale Tuesday, July 21 at Ticketmaster; prices start at $55.

 O’Connell, who’s gay, is the pioneering Michelin-starred chef and longtime proprietor of the Inn at Little Washington. He spoke with the Blade about the September event and the launch of his first memoir.

 “I’ve known [Andrés and Sietsema] for more than 25 years and I have great respect for them,” O’Connell said. “I felt that it would allow us to add a different dimension rather than just have an interviewer. The chemistry will be fun and lively and unpredictable and exciting. I think we’re all different personalities and we’ll compliment each other.”

O’Connell has published cookbooks but this is his first memoir. The event will feature a short film that will highlight his work and the Inn.

“What I hope to do with the event is bring the book to life visually,” he said. “So we’re producing a short film that will be part of it. Most of the audience will not have read the book so it’ll give them a visual flavor of the book. It parallels the evolution of American cuisine over 50 years. It’s a rare perspective to be in the trenches for that long.”

The book’s title refers to the location of the garage on the corner of Main, Middle, and Gay streets in Washington, Va., where he launched his restaurant that became an international culinary destination. 

The Blade will publish the rest of its wide-ranging interview with O’Connell in September in conjunction with the book’s release.

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The queer Asian comics building collective joy in D.C.

Spotlighting chaotic ways family, romance, identity take shape in their lives

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Alex Kim performs at the Pride Comedy Special in Washington, D.C., on June 18, 2026. (Photo by Christina Lee/VOICES)

Kevin Chen’s family tombstone has room for four: him, his parents and his boyfriend. The arrangement might prove to be a little awkward. 

“My boyfriend is 100% white, and my parents are 100% disappointed,” Chen confessed.

Jokes about family traditions and the untraditional ways they’re practiced earned a burst of laughs at the bar where Chen was opening for the Pride Comedy Special. The D.C. stand-up event, produced by Comedy Bonfyre last month, spotlighted queer Asian comics who shared the chaotic ways family, romance and identity take shape in their lives. 

From candid oral sex takes to top surgery hypotheticals like “Where do the boobs go?”, the night highlighted the loud camaraderie of the queer Asian experience — one that sounds like a cacophony of snorts, cackles and belly laughs. While the comics say they are not quite a community, there’s more than enough shared material to bring them together. 

“It was such a magical experience. I loved performing in a queer API lineup. It feels so validating,” Chen said after the show. “I’m wondering, ‘Is this how white men feel all the time?’”

Each performance evoked queer Asian joy through a medium that could use more of its presence.

According to Chen, who is based in D.C., it’s hard to say whether there is a true queer Asian comedy presence in his city. There are only a scattered “handful” of Asian comics, and people of color are underrepresented in queer comic circles, he said. 

When Tarunika Anand, a nonbinary lesbian comic, first entered the mainstream D.C. comedy scene, they mostly encountered straight white men, describing the experience as “a culture shock.”

“I feel like sometimes a lot of queer spaces are really white, and then a lot of Asian spaces are really straight,” Anand said. “I don’t feel like I fit into either.”

But feeling marginalized didn’t stop these comics from honing their craft and creating spaces for others like them. Alex Kim, who headlined the special and is based in Brooklyn, runs the queer Asian comedy group Boba Gays, which began on WhatsApp and has since made its way to Lincoln Center. 

Every Wednesday, Anand co-produces a free comedy show called Funny Side Up. The queer-led group focuses on inclusivity and showcasing new talent.

“It’s really beautiful to speak about your experience and your existence in a way that’s uplifting,” Anand said. 

Family is a major throughline of their comedic repertoires. 

Chen, for instance, shared that he identifies with jokes about having Asian immigrant parents and the expectations they pass down. 

“You see me, you know this part about me, you know this experience intimately, and I can see the truth that you’re trying to wrap a joke around,” he said. “That hits even harder because that’s my truth too. I think that’s what makes good comedy.”

Anand had the audience at the special howling when they explained that their parents’ be-more-like-them comparisons didn’t end when they came out. Instead, the expectations took on a new form. 

“Now, my parents want me to be the best gay,” Anand said. “They’re like, ‘Do you know Ellen DeGeneres?’” 

Kim said he’s been trying to unlearn things from his Christian Korean mom. Yet he described a moment when he was getting ready for the club and realized he looked just like his mother getting ready for church. 

“I’ve been finding it hard to escape her,” Kim said. 

Mutual recognition also radiates through the different ways queer love can take shape. From singlehood to death-do-us-part commitments, the comics cover just about every corner.

Anand is holding out hope for settling down with “a nice, pretty, Indian girl.” They recently went through a breakup and said they felt they dodged a bullet. 

“As a person of color, I just don’t think I should be with a Swiftie,” they said. 

Chen, touching on what it’s like to be in a queer interracial relationship, said that meeting his white boyfriend’s baby nephew for the first time felt like he was forced to participate in a diversity, equity and inclusion training. 

“The dad was like, ‘Please welcome Kevin. Be curious about his culture, his history, his foods,’” Chen joked. 

Laughter is not the only reward for the comics.

To Anand, comedy is a space where they can say whatever they want. “It gives me a voice,” they said. 

Nik Narain, a North Carolina-based trans and nonbinary South Asian comic who performed at the special, said meeting older trans comedians and taking the stage helped him feel reassured in his identity during his transition. 

“Stand-up was a really cool way to process that onstage,” he said. “[It] became a way for me to repackage my thoughts.”

Queer Asians are still figuring out their place in the greater D.C. comedy scene. The group is small in numbers and many are still working toward a full-time comedy career. But Narain feels he’s already made it.

Narain is reluctant to pin it all on one moment. He feels that success is already peeking through in milestones — opening for celebrities, traveling to performances and self-producing shows.

“As long as I can keep doing this, I’m super happy,” he said.

This story was produced as part of the AAJA VOICES fellowship program, a student journalism project of the Asian American Journalists Association (AAJA).

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Mr. Henry’s celebrates 60 years of proud inclusivity

Capitol Hill staple remains ‘a caring community’

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Mr. Henry’s has long been popular with D.C.’s LGBTQ community. (Photo by Liz Stewart)

America’s 250th isn’t the only milestone birthday D.C. is celebrating this year. 

Beloved D.C. restaurant Mr. Henry’s, that Capitol Hill staple, celebrates its Diamond Jubilee all year long. Named for its original owner Henry Yaffe, the restaurant opened on a warm day 60 years ago in the summer of 1966 and has never looked back.

Yaffe took over what was then a country western restaurant, renovated the interior to his liking, and created an institution. Yet Yaffe had another goal. As a gay man, “he created Mr. Henry’s to be a place where everyone felt welcome — not easy in 1966 — and he succeeded,” says current owner Mary Quillian.

Mary Quillian is the current owner of Mr. Henry’s. (Photo by Liz Stewart)

“Mr. Henry’s has long been a place the LGBTQ community has supported because they felt and still feel welcomed,” says Quillian. Even in the current administration, “the gay community and the diversity-minded community continue to come.”

Since then, Mr. Henry’s has changed hands, opened and closed its second floor, welcomed famed musical acts, and played host to politicians, date nights, breakups, and birthdays. But it still feels like home (and has a note in the National Trust for Historic Preservation) at 601 Pennsylvania Ave., S.E.

Its wood-paneled, Victorian-inspired art-filled décor in the downstairs dining room and bar serves American pub fare for lunch and dinner daily, with brunch on weekends (and a dog-friendly patio). Upstairs, Mr. Henry’s hosts live jazz performances and special events most nights, continuing a musical tradition that has defined the venue for decades. That upstairs bar has played host to names like Roberta Flack and Woody Allen.

Musician Kevin Cordt said that, “Mr. Henry’s has been a part of my life for more than 30 years. I started as a customer, then became a bartender and server, and now I have the good fortune to play trumpet at one of the best live music venues in Washington, D.C.”

Aaron Myers, executive director of the D.C. Commission on the Arts and Humanities, is also a supporter. “Not many cities can sport venues that have consistently served the community in the space of culture for more than 50 years, let alone can brag as the birthplace of culture defining talent.”

From the start, Yaffe promoted a rare yet celebrated combination of locals’ bar and soulful nightlife venue. Mr. Henry’s has attracted a diverse crowd at a time when such spaces were – and perhaps still are – uncommon, a diversity that is credited with helping protect the pub during the 1968 D.C. riots.

Longtime customer Evelyn Branic said, “Mr. Henry’s has been my ‘Cheers’ hangout since my wife and I moved to the Hill in 1987. I’ve experienced many iconic moments meeting politicians, reporters, civic activists, and neighbors engaging in spirited conversations. Whether political, LGBTQ, historians, neighbors, or out-of-towners, everyone could find a special place to be greeted as a friend.”

Its welcoming tables come dabbed with a bit of tea: In 1971, in a moment that has since become part of Capitol Hill lore, Yaffe lost the pub in a poker game to Larry Quillian. The Quillian family, recognizing the special role Mr. Henry’s played in the neighborhood, took over ownership, and committed to preserving its spirit. Today, Larry’s daughter Mary owns the bar, having given it a bit of a facelift for the bar’s 50th birthday, bringing in new tables and some fresh menu items.

For example, the menu has some of those dishes that regulars would riot if they disappeared. The Reuben and the hamburgers, the chili and in-house roasted turkey have never departed the menu. Dishes do evolve, says Quillen: they added wings about two decades ago.

In 2026, the restaurant is hosting monthly ticketed “decades” parties, celebrating each of the 10-year periods the restaurant’s been open, plus there were specials in June for Pride. The official 60th anniversary gala takes place Aug. 29, featuring performers, beverages, timeless favorite foods, swag – and the unveiling of a new cocktail.

Inclusive, eccentric, eclectic, Mr. Henry’s is looking forward to maintaining its centrality to diverse crowds in Capitol Hill. Battling inflation, rising menu prices, changing tastes, and thin margins, Quillian says that Mr. Henry’s has — and will always be — “a caring community for so many different folks. And THAT is why I am committed to keeping us going. Society needs places like Mr. Henry’s, now more than ever.”

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