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Queery: Shannon Wyss

The AIDS United grant manager and D.C. Trans Coalition volunteer answers 20 gay questions

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Shannon Wyss, Queery, gay news, Washington Blade
Shannon Wyss, Queery, gay news, Washington Blade

Shannon Wyss (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

Editor’s note: Shannon Wyss requested and uses gender-neutral pronouns.

After majoring in international studies for hir undergrad degree and womens’ studies for hir master’s, Shannon Wyss wasn’t particularly seeking out AIDS work, but Wyss is passionate about both hir day job as grants manager for AIDS United and hir volunteer work at the D.C. Trans Coalition.

“My work at AIDS United is not really activist work for me, although we do have a policy department,” Wyss says. “What I love about it is that we look at HIV not as a biomedical issue, which it certainly is, but as an issue of social justice that focuses very much on why certain groups are affected more than others by HIV. This is not a coincidence. We find time and time again that the people most affected by it are also the most marginalized.”

Wyss says moving forward, increased — and at times uncomfortable — prevention efforts will be needed.

“I feel like medically we have the tools to mostly combat HIV at this point,” Wyss says. “The drugs that are out there are pretty effective. We don’t have a way of curing it, but we can treat it. Where we’re playing catch up is in preventing new infections. Maybe gay men need some messages that would make straight people a bit squeamish. Or we need to talk about access to clean syringes, but we’re not a culture that wants to acknowledge that it has a drug problem. There are a whole bunch of things culturally we need to address if we’re going to stop new infections. And we also have to address all the issues that go along with that, poverty, homophobia, transphobia, xenophobia, race — and I don’t think we’re ready to deal with all that.”

Wyss, a 40-year-old St. Louis native, has been in the Washington area about 17 years after going to college in Vassar (in New York) and spending a year abroad in Senegal on a study program.

Wyss and partner Katie Wanschura have been together nearly 10 years after meeting in a chorus. Two years ago they bought a house in Hyattsville, Md.

In hir free time, Wyss enjoys giving trans and LGBT seminars, working with gender non-conforming kids, photography, “puttering around the house,” reading, gardening, yard work and caring for the couple’s three cats and one dog.” (Blade photo by Michael Key)

How long have you been out and who was the hardest person to tell?

I’ve been out under varying labels since 1993. If I recall correctly, the hardest person to tell at the time was my favorite teacher from high school, whom I wasn’t sure would still accept me. She did and has remained one of my biggest supporters ever since.

Who’s your LGBT hero? 

I deeply admire anyone who is able and willing to be true to hirself under difficult circumstances.

What’s Washington’s best nightspot, past or present? 

I don’t do bars or clubs since I don’t drink or dance. But I love anyplace quiet where I can hang out with friends and loved ones.

Describe your dream wedding.

I don’t believe in assimilating into an institution that the state should not be involved in for any couple or group of people. But I was fortunate enough to have a wonderful commitment ceremony with my life partner in July.

What non-LGBT issue are you most passionate about?

Every issue is an LGBTQ issue! But of those who are commonly defined as “not-LGBTQ,” I would put racial and economic justice at the top of my list.

What historical outcome would you change?

Slavery — everywhere, but especially in the “New World.”

What’s been the most memorable pop culture moment of your lifetime? 

Answering this would actually require me to be somewhat in touch with what “pop culture” is.

On what do you insist?

Justice and an equitable distribution of resources of all kinds for everyone.

What was your last Facebook post or Tweet?

“Wonderful session at the Harm Reduction Conference today on the anti-trafficking movement and how it is, overall, incredibly conservative, ageist, sexist, transphobic, pro-police and disempowering of youth. The feminist, LGBTQ, and harm reduction movements have to think harder about how we can support sex workers’ rights.”

If your life were a book, what would the title be?

“Privileged: How a White, Middle Class, Well-Educated Genderqueer Tried to Make Social Change”

If science discovered a way to change sexual orientation, what would you do?

Help all of the straight women who can’t find a decent man!

What do you believe in beyond the physical world? 

I’m about as agnostic as I can be. So I’m not sure if there’s anything beyond where/what we are now.

What’s your advice for LGBT movement leaders?

It’s about justice, not “just us.” Work with other social justice movements and ours will advance so much more quickly.

What would you walk across hot coals for?

It would have to be something really huge, like a cure for cancer or HIV or world peace. Aside from that, I like my feet just the way they are, thank you.

What LGBT stereotype annoys you most?

What annoys me the most are our community’s attempts to run frantically away from some of the stereotypes about us. There is nothing wrong with being a feminine man, a masculine woman, a radical feminist, sex-positive or a drag queen.

What’s your favorite LGBT movie?

There are so, so many that I haven’t seen! But I do love “Boys Don’t Cry” and “But I’m a Cheerleader.”

What’s the most overrated social custom?

Mornings. And the five-day work week.

What trophy or prize do you most covet?

Being seen as an advocate for social change by my family, friends, and coworkers and, what’s a lot harder, being someone who actually makes change happen.

What do you wish you’d known at 18?

That my life was about to get dramatically better when I went to college and left my small, private, Catholic, cliquey, conservative, all-girls high school.

Why Washington?

I moved here right after college in 1995 and never left: great mass transit, free museums, a really diverse population and progressive overall. What’s not to like?

 

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Photos

PHOTOS: World Pride March

LGBTQ rights demonstration held in Amsterdam

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A scene from the 2026 World Pride March in Amsterdam. (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

The 2026 World Pride March was held on Saturday, Aug. 8 in Amsterdam. Tens of thousands of participants marched from Martin Luther Kingpark to the grounds of the Pride Village at Museumplein.

(Washington Blade photos by Michael Key)

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PHOTOS: Daddy Issues at Kiki

Evry Pleasure, Tiara Missou-Sidora, Indiana Bones perform

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Evry Pleasure performs at the 'Daddy Issues' drag show at Kiki on Wednesday. (Washington Blade photo by Landon Shackelford)

The weekly drag show “Daddy Issues” was held at Kiki on Wednesday, Aug. 5. Performers included Evry Pleasure, Indiana Bones and Tiara Missou-Sidora.

(Washington Blade photos by Landon Shackelford)

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Books

Something’s off about Dad. When is it time to step in?

‘When Memory Fades’ can help when families face dementia

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(Book cover image courtesy of St. Martin's Essentials)

‘When Memory Fades’
By Nathaniel Chin, MD
c.2026, St. Martin’s Essentials
$30/422 pages

Mom called you in a panic the other day.

She’d lost her keys and by the time you arrived to help, she’d found them. In the refrigerator.

These kinds of things keep happening, not often but often enough, and you don’t know quite what to worry about. But in the new book “When Memory Fades” by Nathaniel Chin, MD, you’ll learn about the journey ahead, for both of you.

You can’t remember why you walked into a room. You got lost last week, going to the bank. Popular wisdom says that things like that are normal as we age, but Chin says that’s not true – although the answer may not be a worst-case scenario, either. Yes, memory problems could just be signs of stress, dehydration, or lack of sleep – or is it time to see a doctor?

Chin says maybe, yes.

He was working his way through medical residency when his father, a geriatrician in Madison, Wisc., was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. Chin, now a geriatrician, was blindsided, but that diagnosis also changed his life.

Here, he writes about the brain, and how Alzheimer’s and dementia are diagnosed, explaining that dementia has many faces and, depending on a doctor’s evaluation, memory problems might be slowed or improved. He shares his father’s illness with readers, but he also writes about his mother, a steadfast, steady caretaker.

Her story reminds reader-guardians to care for themselves, too.

Know how to talk the talk, so that you can have “a more productive” conversation with your doctor. Understand that there’s nothing “normal” about dementia or Alzheimer’s. Know the statistics – African Americans are affected with dementia twice as much as whites – and know how to lower your risks. Learn here what questions to ask, how to break the news to everyone, and any legal matters that will be important soon. And know how to tend to you.

Says Chin, “The best action you can take is to educate yourself… The more you understand, the better equipped you are to make sound judgments.”

Something’s off about Dad, just a lot of little things that don’t add up. When is it time to step in? “When Memory Fades” can help you decide.

Wise, wide-spread, comprehensive, and compassionately helpful, this is a book you can read and then take it to the doctor with your loved one. It’s a book that makes sense when nothing else does, and its biggest feature is that it smoothly transitions from easy-to-grasp science and charts, to gentle coaching for caregivers. Author Nathaniel Chin, MD writes with storytelling, humility, grace, and experience from both sides of the Alzheimer’s/dementia issue, and his words are reassuring but also urgent. Learn, but don’t wait, he says. Know how to safeguard yourself. See your doctor, and don’t fear testing. Watch for signs of depression. And never, ever stop asking for help.

Read those last seven words, and find “When Memory Fades” now. It’s a book to have on your shelf, whether you’re 45 or 95 because, as you’ll see, dementia happens and knowledge is key.

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