Arts & Entertainment
Dating app #open offers free virtual sex-ed class to help ease the ‘self-isolation’ blues

While self-isolation and staying “safer at home” are undoubtedly the right thing to do for the overall health and well-being of ourselves and the larger community, they aren’t necessarily great for our sex lives.
With efforts to “flatten the curve” on the spread of COVID-19 already stretching out into weeks, many single and non-monogamous people – or even monogamous couples, if separated by circumstance during the quarantine – are sure to be feeling the call of their libido. Rather than giving into the potentially catastrophic temptation of risking an in-person meet-up, many of those with the urge to get their groove on are turning to the many options for remote connection available to us in the age of smart phones and video conferencing.
While the virtual approach to shared sexual experience may be familiar enough for many of us, there are also many for whom it is a challenging journey into unexplored territory – and in terms of finding a meaningful connection that goes deeper than an impersonal and anonymous hook-up. Rather than letting that be an obstacle to participation in a little sexual self-care, why not get a few tips from an expert so you can be ready to dive in with confidence?
To that end, #open, a dating app for women and other marginalized groups including people seeking open or polyamorous relationships, has partnered with sex and relationship educator Sarah Sloane to offer a virtual video sex education workshop on dating in isolation (or iso-dating), which is happening on Saturday, March 28.
Sloane, according to her website, wears “a number of different hats” in both her personal and professional lives. An educator with twenty years of experience teaching thousands of people throughout the US, Canada, and overseas, she’s also written “hundreds of articles, essays, advice columns, book chapters, and blog posts on topics ranging from sexuality and pleasure to mental wellness, personal growth, aging, and trauma recovery.”
Her writings have been featured in magazines such as the adult industry retail magazine StorErotica, as well as online in places like PopSugar, and in books like Tristan Taormino’s “Ultimate Guide to Kink: BDSM, Role Play, and the Erotic Edge” and Lee Harrington’s book, “Rope, Bondage and Power.” In addition, she was Ms. Illinois Leather Pride 2016, was nominated for the Pantheon of Leather’sWoman of the Year award for 2009, was first runner-up for International Ms. Leather 2009, and was a past nominee for the Vaughan Keith National Educator award from Black Rose.
As for #open, the relative newcomer among the array of dating apps was launched by co-founders Amanda Wilson and David Epstein, who themselves met on a dating app in 2015 and decided to build one of their own a year later. In the words of Epstein, “it’s an app that’s been built for people with a fairly open mindset, when it comes to human sexuality.”
The fledgling app has already been proactive during the current coronavirus crisis, advising its users to look to the virtual sphere for a healthier alternative for sexual exploration and encouraging them to use the opportunity to work on other aspects of dating, such as their communication skills. Now, they’re going a step further by presenting Sloane’s online workshop to help us get the most out of the experience.
“The spread of COVID-19 has been hard on our community at large. Sex-positive outlets have been disporpotionately affected by this pandemic and for many it feels as though the community we have all worked so hard to pull together has been pushed apart,” says app co-founder Wilson. “More now than ever we need connection and commonality, which is why we’ve joined forces with Sex Educator Sarah Sloane to bring you a virtual dating workshop that is open to all!”
She added, “This Saturday evening’s class ‘Iso-dating 101 (with Q&A)’ has all of your favorite sex-ed workshop components without any work (getting out of bed is not required)! Whether you’re new to online dating or you’re trying to figure out the best way to frame your needs and expectations when in-person meetups are out of the question, this free educational ‘social gathering’ is for you.”
You can attend the virtual workshop on Saturday, March 28, at 7:00pm ET / 4:00pm PT, at hashtagopen.com/live.
Nightlife
In D.C. comedy, be sure to shop local
A thriving patchwork of queer-friendly stages in Washington, Baltimore
Most people know stand-up comedy from Netflix specials or late-night sets on Comedy Central. The reality is far different for local working comics like me. A few times a month, I might get paid $50 for a 10-minute set and my photo on a bar flyer to show off to the ladies in my scrapbooking club.
Still, it’s a joy sharing laughs about my well-worn Washington career arc — from conservative reporter to openly trans organic grocery store worker and nightclub comedian. Or, as I like to say onstage, from Fox to foxy.
Stand-up is hard. Offstage, it’s even harder. It took more than a year and nearly 80 open mics to land my first paid set. Since then, I’ve performed in coffee shops, bars, restaurants and even on a city sidewalk. I once performed in the Catskills, which felt like a big deal — even if it was a bigger deal in the 1950s.
As an older trans comic in Washington, I’ve found it nearly impossible to get stage time — or even the courtesy of a returned email — at the big, corporate-owned comedy clubs. Fortunately, there’s a thriving patchwork of queer-friendly producers in Washington and Baltimore creating shows that reflect the diversity of our communities, instead of straight male-dominated lineups that look like the cast of “Ice Road Truckers.”
“There are so many kinds of funny people, but a lot of barriers exist for women and queer people because it’s a very masculine culture,” said Dana Fleitman, who runs the Just Kidding Comedy Collective and is helping produce the Woke Mob Comedy Festival in April, featuring many women and queer comics.
Full disclosure: I’m not performing in the festival. But I am proud to be one of more than 50 women and nonbinary comics Fleitman and her colleagues have helped “train up” through an incubator program she first ran through Grassroots Comedy and now through Just Kidding Comedy Collective.
Another trans comic, Charlie Girard, who splits time between New York and Washington, runs an incubator program called Queers Can’t Take a Joke. He has trained more than 100 comics in Washington.
Girard has one rule: no punching down.
“The best comics speak truth to power,” Girard said. “Making fun of marginalized communities is simple lazy writing based on tired, old stereotypes.”
Ultimately, Girard wants to prepare students not just for queer rooms, but to find their voice and expand into all kinds of spaces.
Comics trained by Girard and Fleitman have gone on to produce or help run shows like Clocked Comedy, Backbone Comedy, the Crackin’ Up open mic and Funny Side Up. Several have found a home on Barracks Row at As You Are — one of my favorite places to perform. In Washington, comic Jenny Cavallero’s show Seltzer is a sober comedy night frequently featuring local queer comics.
In Washington, performer and producer Arzoo Malhotra, who runs Zoo Animal Productions, said it’s a critical moment to support community-based comedy producers, often the first hit by worsening economic conditions.
“We’re losing spaces faster than we’re creating them,” Malhotra said. “We are in the use-it-or-lose-it stage. If there’s a restaurant you like or a performer you want to keep seeing, patronize them now — because they’re going away.”
I’m also grateful for producers in Baltimore, which has a thriving queer comedy scene. Comic Hannah Alden Jeffrey’s monthly “The Really Cool Open Mic,” created for women and trans performers but open to all, regularly draws up to 100 people.
Hannah’s mic and Kenny Rooster’s “Dramedy” open stage have provided safety and opportunity when other stages felt out of reach. Comedians Michael Furr and Jake Leizear also produce shows regularly featuring queer comics.
“We started the REALLY COOL Open Mic because every other mic in town catered toward straight dudes that dominated the Baltimore scene,” Alden Jeffrey said. “Contrary to the lineups of many shows today, people don’t want to see a show of eight guys being bigots. Go figure.”
One of the most important moments for me came when I attended a free showcase at a well-known Adams Morgan club. Like other big venues, it hadn’t responded to emails from a new comic looking for a shot. I sat in the back row thinking maybe these comics were just way funnier than I am.
Then a straight male comedian — with hair even more gorgeous than mine — launched into a long joke comparing eating pizza to performing oral sex on a woman.
At that moment, I walked out feeling better about myself. I remember thinking: nope. I absolutely deserve to be on that stage, too.
Lots of us do.
Jamie Mack is a stand up comedian, speaker and writer. Follow them on Instagram at @jamiemack_blt or email [email protected].
Celebrity News
Liza Minnelli makes surprise appearance at GLAAD Media Awards
Laverne Cox’s fiery speech earned standing ovation
Last night’s GLAAD Media Awards had a few pleasant surprises in store.
Throughout the evening, which was hosted by “Mean Girls” star Jonathan Bennett on Thursday at the Beverly Hilton in Los Angeles, the audience was clued into the fact that a mystery guest would make an appearance. By the end of the night, it was revealed to be none other than “Cabaret” star and queer icon Liza Minnelli, who was in attendance to accept the newly-created Liza Minnelli Storyteller Award.
An emotional Minnelli told the crowd of queer attendees and creatives, “You make me so proud because you’re so strong, and you stand up for what you believe in. You really do, and it’s so nice to be here. I feel like a five-year-old!” Everyone then joined in a happy birthday celebration for Minnelli’s upcoming birthday on March 12, and the release of her upcoming memoir, “Kids, Wait Till You Hear This!”
Another moment that got the audience standing and cheering was when “Orange Is the New Black” star Laverne Cox took to the stage to call out how “what is going on right now in the United States of America is not right.”
She said, “Identify, I said this earlier, and I’m going to say it again, what dehumanizing language and images are. Call it out and don’t buy into it! So much of my struggle over the past several years [has been] trying to figure out how to combat this assault on my community, rhetorically. I do not want to have the conversation about my life and my humanity on the oppressor’s terms.”
That message was echoed by Bowen Yang and Matt Rogers when accepting the Stephen F. Kolzak Award for their “Las Culturistas” podcast and pledging to donate $10,000 to Equality Kansas after the state revoked transgender people’s driver’s licenses. “We cannot accept this award without condemning the rampant active transphobia from this administration,” Rogers said. “We are also here to let them know in advance that they are fighting a losing battle. When we gather in rooms like this, we are always going to have each other’s backs.”
Among the big winners last night were “Heated Rivalry” for outstanding new TV series, “The Traitors” for outstanding reality competition program, “Stranger Things” for outstanding drama series, “Palm Royale” (which was just cancelled after two seasons) for outstanding comedy series, “Come See Me in the Good Light” for outstanding documentary, “Kiss of the Spider Woman” for outstanding wide theatrical release film and a tie between “A Nice Indian Boy” and “Plainclothes” for outstanding limited theatrical release film.
Quinta Brunson received the Vanguard Award for her hit TV series “Abbott Elementary,” which features Jacob, an openly queer character played by Chris Perfetti. Brunson said, “Queer people have been a part of my life since birth. I have to shout out my uncle … who was the first example of representation in my life of queer people, who allowed me to be free. There are so many people in the room who changed my life.”
On the music side, Young Miko won for outstanding music artist, and KATSEYE won for outstanding breakthrough music artist. Demi Lovato even opened the show with a steamy performance of her single “Kiss.”
The GLAAD Media Awards will officially air Saturday, March 21 on Hulu.
Photos
PHOTOS: Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras Parade
48th annual LGBTQ event held in Australian city
The 48th annual Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras Parade was held on Feb. 28.
(Photos by Cori Mitchell)




















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