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Queery: Ryan Bos

The Capital Pride director answers 20 gay questions

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Ryan Bos (Blade photo by Michael Key)

Ryan Bos switched gears after a 15-year career working in residential life on campus at University of Maryland Baltimore County last October to take the reins at Capital Pride where he’s executive director.

“It was really a way of getting back to my passion and what I grew up with,” the 38-year-old gay Michigan City, Ind., native says. “My family had always been involved in non-profit work. For years, we coordinated a large ethnic musical festival back in northwest Indiana, so I grew up with this kind of work.”

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Bos says his new job has brought with it, as one would imagine, a learning curve, but he says now that Pride season is here, things are coming together.

“The events so far have surpassed my expectations,” he says. “I’m really excited about the weekend.”

Bos says LGBT Washingtonians have an exciting weekend in store.

“I think so many people see it as just the parade and the festival and it’s so much more than that,” he says. “It really is an opportunity to ‘be true, be you.’ … It’s a time to really celebrate, let your hair down and be yourself.”

Bos is single and says he’s content to be so. Before coming to this area — he first landed in Catonsville, Md., but has been living in D.C. the past three years — he was in Muncie, Ind., earning his undergraduate and graduate degrees at Ball State University.

Bos lives in the Mount Vernon Square area and enjoys swimming, softball, volunteering, running and watching TV in his free time.

For more on Capital Pride, see pages 60-68 or visit capitalpride.org.

How long have you been out and who was the hardest person to tell? 

I’ve been out to myself since 20, been out to the family since 22. It was hardest telling my parents.

Who’s your LGBT hero?

I’d have to give props to Ellen.

What’s Washington’s best nightspot, past or present? 

I miss Nation, but also really enjoyed Tracks, which was around for one more year when I moved to the area. The closing party was one of my favorite nights. Nothing like closing the place down with a breakfast buffet at the end of the night (morning) and sitting down on the dance floor eating scrambled eggs, bacon and pancakes.

Describe your dream wedding. 

Not sure I’ll ever get married, but if I were it would be simple with family and close friends. Honeymoon would involve an element of nature and adventure.

What non-LGBT issue are you most passionate about?

Classism

What historical outcome would you change? 

The assassination of Martin Luther King. I’m curious if he’d still be alive if the LGBT movement would have made progress much quicker.

What’s been the most memorable pop culture moment of your lifetime? 

I’d have to say Michael Jackson and MTV. I can still remember the night the “Thriller” video debuted.

On what do you insist?

Non-smoking

What was your last Facebook post or Tweet? 

I think I may have either severely sprained or broke my ankle.

If your life were a book, what would the title be?

“A Life of Contradiction”

If science discovered a way to change sexual orientation, what would you do?

Nothing

What do you believe in beyond the physical world? 

That our energy is interconnected and we evolve into something else. I do believe there is something greater than us.

What’s your advice for LGBT movement leaders? 

Don’t waste time on debating what issue to fight for next. Just fight and stand up for what you believe. There’s plenty of resources and agencies that we can support and fight from all sides.

What would you walk across hot coals for?

Dark chocolate, but also to help my family and close friends.

What LGBT stereotype annoys you most? 

None really annoy me because our community is so diverse. What annoys me is when people don’t acknowledge the diversity within our community.

What’s your favorite LGBT movie?

“Broken Hearts Club”

What’s the most overrated social custom?

Shaving

What trophy or prize do you most covet?

My finishing medal from the first marathon I did.

What do you wish you’d known at 18?

That it’s OK to “Be True. Be You!” I actually wish I would have known that and had the confidence to be that much younger, especially through high school.

Why Washington?

There’s so much energy in this region. I love the diversity within the District but also the ease of travel to areas close by like Baltimore, Philly, NYC, Rehoboth, etc.

 

 

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Theater

National tour of ‘Gatsby’ comes to National Theatre

Out actor Edward Staudenmayer talks playing the show’s gangster

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Edward Staudenmayer plays Meyer Wolfsheim in ‘The Great Gatsby.’ (Photo courtesy National Theatre)

‘The Great Gatsby’
May 12-24
The National Theatre
1321 Pennsylvania Ave., N.W.
$59-$196
Thenationaldc.com

Often dubbed “The Great American Novel” for its depiction of ambition and self-invention alongside the reversals of success, F. Scott Fitzgerald’s “The Great Gatsby” says it all in a fast read. 

Set against the excesses and energy of the Roaring Twenties, “The Great Gatsby,” novel and now the same-titled hit Broadway musical with a jazz/pop original score by Jason Howland and Nathan Tysen, tells the story of Nick Carraway and his friendship with Jay Gatsby, an enigmatic millionaire intent on reuniting with ex-lover, Daisy Buchanan. 

It was during a four-month 2025 run in Seoul, South Korea, that out actor Edward Staudenmayer first played the show’s heavy, Meyer Wolfsheim, a gangster who helped Gatsby make his murkily acquired fortune. As Meyer, Staudenmayer opens the second act with, appropriately enough, “Shady.”  

Now three months into a year-long North American tour, the show is poised to enjoy a brief run at Washington’s National Theatre (5/12-5/24). 

While putting on his eyeliner prior to a recent Wednesday matinee at Chicago’s Cadillac Palace Theatre, the upstate New York-based actor shared about Gatsby and a life in theater. 

WASHINGTON BLADE: Despite your good looks and terrific voice, you’re rarely the leading the man. How is that?

EDWARD STAUDENMAYER: I’m definitely a character man. I’ve been painting lines on my face to play old men since I was in high school. I was the youngest freshman in college playing old Uncle Sorin [in Chekhov’s “The Seagull”]. 

There have been many villains. Some darker than others. Meyer Wolfsheim is a very bad guy, but he doesn’t haunt me once I’m offstage. I play a lot of pickleball. 

BLADE: Is it true that like so many of Fitzgerald’s characters, Wolfsheim is famously based on someone the writer encountered in life. 

STAUDENMEYER: That’s true, Wolfsheim is pretty much a direct portrayal of real-life mobster and 1919 World Series fixer [Arnold Rothstein].

BLADE: When did the 1925 novel first surface on your radar? 

STAUDENMAYER: Like many of us, I was assigned “The Great Gatsby” in high school. It was short, and filled with sex and illicit activities. I thought it was great. Definitely wasn’t a Judy Blume novel. 

Interestingly, the book wasn’t originally a huge a success for Fitzgerald, but because it was about war and having the girl at home, they gave it to GIs leaving for WWII. After returning, a lot of those guys went on the GI Bill and became English teachers. They assigned the book to their students. 

BLADE The idea that the book’s first-person narrator, Nick Carraway, is gay and enamored with Jay Gatsby is long discussed among readers and scholars. Does the musical touch on that?

STAUDENMAYER: Yes, there’s conjecture about Jay and Nick, and it’s implied in our show. It’s also implied about Jordan Baker, Jay’s fleeting romantic interest. Ultimately, she’s a confirmed bachelor, and a professional golfer who only wears pants.  

Our performers are really good. Josh Grasso who plays Nick is fantastic. I’ve had to stop watching him in his last scene; it’s not good for Meyer Wolfsheim to take his curtain call crying. Our Gatsby, Jake David Smith, is good too. He’s gorgeous like Superman and sings like an angel. 

BLADE: Do you ever imagine backstory for your characters whose sexuality is undefined?

STAUDENMAYER: I do, but not with Wolfsheim. I don’t see it. I’m trying to be as butch as possible with this ruthless killer. 

BLADE: Have you had to do that in your career?

STAUDENMAYER: For a long time, I wore a mask to hide my gayness. I worked hard on being believable, that I was into the girl or that I was a tough guy. 

It’s a different world now, and it’s so refreshing to be around the younger actors today; they’re remarkably open and comfortable.

BLADE: What was your coming of age like?

STAUDENMAYER: I played high school football in Palm Springs [he chuckles, alluding to the arid gay mecca], and I was pretty good too. But much to the chagrin of my parents and coaches, I quit the team to act in our senior year play. My super butch dad played semi-pro football and he was an ex-cop. I’m named after him. While I didn’t become my dad, I’ve played him often on stage. He was a true Gaston [the bumptious rival in “Beauty and the Beast”]. And like Gaston, he used antlers in all his interior decorating. 

BLADE: Did he live to see your success in theater?

STAUDENMAYER: He did. Life was challenging growing up but the last 10 years of his life we couldn’t get off the phone with each other [his voice catches with emotion]. He accepted me entirely, and we became very close. 

BLADE: Looking ahead, is there a part you’d especially like to play?

STAUDENMAYER: Like all baritones I’d love to play Sondheim’s “Sweeney Todd.” I’ve come close but it hasn’t happened yet. There’s still time. 

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Music & Concerts

DJ Chanel Santini is bringing the heat and some gender-fluid diversity to XBIZ Miami

Pool party celebrates most charismatic personalities, creative artists in adult entertainment

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DJ Chanel Santini (Photo courtesy of Miss Lainie PR)

Chanel Santini has crossed over to being a DJ, performing at clubs all over the country. Now known as Santini, they will be making music and hyping the pool party, DJ-ing at XBIZ, the conference for adult creators and digital players, in Miami.

Taking place on Monday to Wednesday, the event honors the most charismatic personalities and creative artists in entertainment.

“I am honestly so excited — getting to DJ in Miami Beach is literally a DJ’s dream!” Santini told the Los Angeles Blade. 

“I thought it would be a good opportunity because I haven’t been around my industry peers in a long time. It’s a great event to network and show off the new me!” said Santini.

While Santini is unsure what music they will be playing, they want everyone to have a good time. “My goal is to ignite the dance floor and play great music that everyone will vibe to. My sound includes house music, bass house, tech house, and I always like to throw a little bit of hip-hop in my sets.” 

Santini loves how DJ-ing brings people together. 

“Music really ignites us all! It is so universal, no matter what language you speak. I think it’s the best high in the world when you play a banger track, and everybody on the dance floor screams loudly. You can’t describe that feeling until you’re up there on that stage.”

 Santini describes DJs as the “modern rock stars” in today’s world. 

“I always feel like such a superstar when I’m up on that stage. The best feeling is after my set when I have people come up to me and say, ‘Thank you for sharing that amazing music.’ That’s how you know that you’re a good DJ — I love when I get those types of compliments!”

DJ Chanel Santini / Photo courtesy of Miss Lainie PR

While sometimes it’s hard to please everyone’s musical tastes, Santini endeavors to try! “You just have to go out there and give it your all and be the best DJ that you can be,” he noted.

Santini, who had previously identified as transgender, recently decided to transition back to being gender fluid.

“It’s definitely been a journey, but I’m definitely happier in my own skin now than I was. I don’t go by he/him pronouns. I don’t go by they/them either. I guess I just really don’t have a preference. Whatever you see me as is your opinion. I’ve learned over the years that I’m not trying to be one specific thing. I’m just Santini. I’m just me.” 

Santini acknowledged they felt respected more when dressed as a woman.

“I think it’s just because femininity runs the world. When I started to de-transition, I felt like I had to just be a boy all the time. But I’ve realized over the years that I don’t need to stick to one specific thing. I am always gonna be feminine, and that’s OK.”

Recently, Santini has been embracing their feminine side more.

“I definitely feel more comfortable in female presentation, and more powerful when I’m on stage dressed as Chanel. I love DJ-ing in drag because there are so many straight male DJs in the world. It’s almost like a superhero when he puts on his cape! I think it makes me confident and stand out more as an artist.” 

And because Santini loves makeup and fashion, they can incorporate that into their sets. “I’m not just bringing you good vibes and good music. I’m bringing you a show/ production!”

DJ Chanel Santini / Photo courtesy of Miss Lainie PR

Santini is already working on big plans for the future.

“I’m opening up for a huge Pride block party in my hometown, Albuquerque, N.M., on June 12 and 13. It’s a two day festival and I’m super excited for this opportunity. I’m even hiring backup dancers and a choreographer.”

Santini plans to go “all out” for this show. 

“It’s gonna be the biggest crowd that I’ve ever played for,” Santini enthused. “I’m putting my heart and soul into this performance, especially because it’s Pride in my hometown, and that means so much to me. I know the younger me would be so proud.”

Santini remembers going to Pride when they were younger and telling themself they couldn’t wait to be up on that stage.

“I’m truly living my dream right now, and I’m so excited for the future. The last 10 years of being in the adult entertainment business have been great and have given me major success. But I always knew that I didn’t want to be in this industry for long.”

Santini acknowledged that, in the recent past, it was a struggle.

“I’ve been trying to find myself and figure out what I wanna do next with my life. Now that I’ve found this passion for DJ-ing, it makes me want to go far in this business.”

In addition to being a DJ/artist, Santini is starting college next semester. 

“I’m gonna get my degree in audio engineering,” Santini enthused. “I can’t wait to start producing my own tracks. I especially can’t wait till the day I’m headlining a major festival! I know with a little bit of patience and hard work that I can get there! I just have to continue believing in myself.”

Santini wanted to thank all of their fans for their support. “Truly, if it wasn’t for them, I wouldn’t be able to fund my art in the way that I have. I’m truly grateful. And I’m excited for the future!”

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Out & About

Learn more about queer love

Friends of Dorothy Cafe hosts event at City-State Public House

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Friends of Dorothy Cafe will host “Living History: How We Loved” on Thursday, May 14 at 7:30 p.m. at City-State Public House. 

Guests will hear how queer and trans people have loved and cared for one another, especially when legal, medical, and social systems did not recognize those relationships. We’ll reflect on chosen family, long-term partnerships before marriage equality, caregiving during the AIDS crisis, hidden romances, friendship as survival, chosen family, and the loves that changed the course of our lives. This evening is about honoring lived experience, preserving community memory, and strengthening the bridge between generations.

Tickets are $24.57 and are available on Eventbrite

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