Connect with us

Bars & Parties

Celebrating marriage

This year’s Hillwood Gay Day to honor D.C.’s right to wed  

Published

on

A fall shot of Hillwood's French Parterre. (Photo courtesy of Hillwood)

“Gay Day” at Hillwood features everything matrimonial as well as fun for kids. It’s this Saturday at D.C.’s fabled estate, museum and gardens.

“Where fabulous lives” is rightly the tag-line for the 36-room mansion, nestled on 25 acres encircled by woods and with 16,000 art objects from Faberge Easter Eggs produced for the Russian Imperial Court to Beauvais 18th-century French tapestries to Sevres porcelain.

But on Saturday from 10 a.m. to 6 p.m., Hillwood — a decorative arts museum and the former home and gardens of Post cereals heiress Marjorie Merriweather Post — will come alive with morning activities for LGBT families with their kids and in the afternoon with festivities specially keyed to same-sex couples contemplating getting married in D.C.

“We are thrilled to celebrate the newfound right of hundreds of couples who can now legally marry in D.C.,” said Hillwood media relations head Lynn Rossotti, “so this year we’ve added new wedding-themed elements to make Gay Day at Hillwood new for this year.”

According to Rossotti, marriage-related events include “punch on the portico styled like a wedding reception, story telling about marriage equality and a community bulletin board to post pictures, thoughts, quotes, wedding vows and tips. The D.C. Lambda Squares will also lead square dancing and Broadway love songs will be performed by the Rock Creek Singers of the Gay Men’s Chorus of Washington.

The morning begins on the mansion’s south portico with a family garden party co-hosted with Rainbow Families and includes breakfast treats, a performance of “Royal Russian Adventures” by Adventure Theatre, an “imagination station” (featuring books, games and fancy dress-up) and Russian wedding gown arts activities, followed by tee time on the estate’s putting green.

Afternoon festivities switch gears beginning with three gallery talks — at 12:30, 1:30 and 2:30 p.m. — by curator Howard Kurtz about Mrs. Post’s wedding dress from her 1958 marriage to Herbert May. At 1 and 3 p.m., D.C. Lambda Squares will lead square dancing. At 2 and 4, Speakeasy D.C. will present three storytellers that Rossotti called “real people who will share their personal stories about what marriage equality means to them.” At 2:30 and 3:30, the Rock Creek Singers perform.

From 4 to 6 p.m., participants can enjoy a wedding-style reception with hors d’oeuvres and punch on the mansion portico, with floral displays and a reproduction of a feature of the Post-May wedding, that Rossotti called “a gazebo-May pole with carved wooden poles surrounding a table for refreshments with its very mid-century ‘retro’ look of the 1950s era.”

Vintage cars will also be shown throughout the afternoon by the Straight Eights Region of the Lambda Car Club. And four rooms not usually open to the public — including Mrs. Post’s private napping room, called the “Snooze Room” — will be shown by interpreters.

Since 2001, Hillwood created an advisory committee of area LGBT leaders and has stressed outreach to the LGBT community, hosting past “Gay Day” annual events and summer outdoor film classics. Hillwood received an “Ally of the Year” award in 2007 from the Capital Area Gay and Lesbian Chamber of Commerce. This year’s “Gay Day” is co-sponsored by Spectrum Printing and Graphics and ACKC — Artfully Chocolate Kingsbury Confections.

Hillwood’s estate and gardens house one of America’s premier art collector’s museums in the U.S. Built in the 1920s on a wooded spot overlooking Rock Creek Park to the east, Post acquired the estate in 1955 after her divorce from her third husband, Joseph E. Davies, a wealthy investor and Franklin Roosevelt’s ambassador to the Soviet Union (1937-1938).

Admission fees for the “Gay Day” special family hours from 10 a.m. to noon are $12. From noon to 6 p.m., admission is $12 ($10 for Hillwood members), $7 for college students. There’s no charge for children and teens under 18 all day.

Hillwood is at 4155 Linnean Ave., N.W., about one mile north of the National Zoo, above Tilden Street between Connecticut Avenue and Rock Creek Park.

Advertisement
FUND LGBTQ JOURNALISM
SIGN UP FOR E-BLAST

Bars & Parties

Lesbian Bar Project co-founder: purity politics could destroy our remaining spaces

Last Ditch’s decision to lift its mask requirement for one night a week has sparked intra-queer controversy

Published

on

(Design by Soph Holland)

Uncloseted Media published this story on Sept. 29

By ERICA ROSE and THE LESBIAN BAR PROJECT | As a professional lesbian and Massachusetts native, I’ve recently been asked by a lot of folks what I think about the saga unfolding at Last Ditch. The now-viral story, first reported by the Boston Globe, centers on a Western Massachusetts lesbian bar that lifted its mask requirement for one night a week to help drum up business.

The decision ignited an intra-queer controversy that has been feasted on by media outlets across the political spectrum — from the New York Post to LGBTQ Nation — and is even reportedly being eyed for a Hollywood adaptation. Apparently nothing is more entertaining than a bunch of lesbians and queers fighting with each other over KN-95s.

What has been lost in all of the chatter and media coverage is the very real possibility that Last Ditch, which just opened in April 2025, will have to close its doors. The venue’s one remaining founder, Jackie Matellian, revealed in a community Zoom meeting that she’s working four jobs, is now solely responsible for the bar’s $50,000 business loan and is struggling to keep up with the bills. So as we laugh about the controversy’s similarity to a “Portlandia” skit and how one of the bar’s founders left to enroll in clown school, we forget that yet another lesbian bar is facing an existential crisis — and this time the call is coming from inside the house.

In 2020, my friend Elina Street and I created The Lesbian Bar Project, an Emmy-, Webby- and GLAAD Media Award-winning docuseries and initiative that tells the stories of lesbian queer bars around the world. We were moved to act because at the time there were only an estimated 16 lesbian bars in the United States, and the pandemic threatened to bring that number down even further.

There are now more sapphic bars than there were just before the pandemic — about 36 of them in total — but this is down from approximately 200 in 1980. Maybe that doesn’t mean much to you, but for the millions of sapphics living in the U.S., this number is calamitous.

As the world laughs at lesbians and sapphics, I want to take a second and tell you what I feel when I walk into one of these bars, which are all unique and irreplaceable in their own way: I feel seen.

Sometimes I think Cubbyhole in New York City’s West Village neighborhood knew I was gay before I did. When I walked in there for the first time, before I was even out, I was transfixed by the colorful array of tchotchkes hanging from the ceiling and how the women standing next to me were completely unafraid to express their desire for one another. I knew the minute I was ready to come out, I had a home. I also felt the joy of a new couple falling in love at Seattle’s Wildrose, the quiet confidence of a short king lining up her shot at the pool table at Ginger’s in Brooklyn and the kick of cayenne pepper in Julie Mabry’s crawfish at Houston’s Pearl Bar.

Lesbian bars don’t just serve lesbians; they serve queer folks across the spectrum, including bisexual, pansexual and trans people. As Elina and I traveled across the U.S. and Europe and to parts of Latin America to document the bar owners, staff and patrons that make up the ecosystems of these spaces, we also became uniquely acquainted with the factors that threaten their existence: gentrification, wage gaps, sexism, environmental disasters, gun violence, rising insurance premiums and political administrations working to annihilate queer people and their families.

Lesbian bar owners, like all leaders and entrepreneurs, are imperfect. There have been significant issues over the years at lesbian bars: employee harassment, racism, lack of accessibility, sexual assault and transphobia. All bar owners should be held accountable and should listen to their communities to evolve into safer and more equitable spaces. I also acknowledge my privilege: I am able-bodied, white, cis and from a family system that loves me for who I am. Not everyone has that.

Queer people, especially trans and bisexual people, are suffering from disproportionately high levels of depression, and our mental health system isn’t equipped to support them. Immunocompromised people and long COVID are real, and many of my friends are suffering to this day. The people with the least safety net are often the ones for whom a bar closing costs the most. And yet, as we’re seeing with Last Ditch, the queer community often lashes out at each other. It’s also the mainstream media taking the internal conflict and making a mockery out of it, distracting from the real possibility that this bar could close due to financial pressures. A bar that many people loved and needed is facing extinction. Perhaps it’s safer to dissent with one another than with the larger forces trying to eradicate us, but in doing so, we risk destroying the few spaces we have left.

Due to the constraints of purity politics — some in good faith, some not so much — lesbian bar owners, almost all of whom are queer women themselves, are forced to be everything for everyone, similarly to how women are forced to be everything for everyone. By asking these bars to uphold impossible standards — standards very few other third spaces are asked to consider — we all end up losing.

I want to move as a community toward dialogue, compassionate dissent and collaboration to make our spaces better with the goal of keeping them OPEN and thriving, rather than destroying them from the inside with expectations that are arguably unattainable.

While I have your attention — for this fleeting second of the news cycle — may I urge us to spearhead a way to keep these small businesses afloat without attacking our own community along the way? Bar owners are left with an impasse: They want to be community-centered, but they also have to make money to keep their doors open. Sometimes they might make business decisions that don’t work for everyone — and that’s partly because different patrons have different priorities and want different things — but these owners deserve the opportunity for productive dialogue. We have to work with them and with each other to keep our spaces open, to keep them growing.

Lesbian bars raised me into the queer woman I am today. One thing I think about as I reflect on the six years of work we’ve done to document these spaces is that shared, unspoken language I have with a stranger the moment we both walk into one of these bars: the nod, the ease, the not having to explain ourselves. I don’t want to lose that, and neither should you.

Continue Reading

Bars & Parties

Queer Magic dance party planned

Tarot, dancing, drag and more at Black Cat event

Published

on

Celebrate the start of Pride month at the Queer Magic Dance Party at the Black Cat on Saturday, June 6. Doors open at 9 p.m.

There will be pole performances and demonstrations, a free photo booth with glitter bar, a queer vendor market, tarot readings by Skye Marinda Tarot, a drag performance by Sapphica, and dancing to a blend of smooth R&B, Afrobeats, hip-hop and pop by Slammer & Saba. Tickets are $20 at the door or $15 (plus fees) in advance, purchased here.

Continue Reading

Bars & Parties

Here’s where to watch ‘RuPaul’s Drag Race’ with fellow fans

Entertainers TrevHER and Grey host event with live performance

Published

on

(Photo by New Africa/Bigstock)

Spark Social Events will host “Ru Paul’s Drag Race S18 Watch Party Hosted by Local Drag Queens” on Friday, Jan. 23 at 8 p.m.

Drag entertainers TrevHER and Grey will provide commentary and make live predictions on who’s staying and who’s going home. Stick around after the show for a live drag performance. The watch party will take place on a heated outdoor patio and cozy indoor space.

This event is free and more details are available on Eventbrite.

Continue Reading

Popular