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Other mothers

Local performers honor their drag moms

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Ba'Naka, drag, drag queen, Town Danceboutique, gay news, LGBT Nightlife, Washington Blade
Ba'Naka, drag, drag queen, Town Danceboutique, gay news, LGBT Nightlife, Washington Blade, Shi-Queeta Lee, Lena Lett, High heel race, 17th street, Frank Kameny Way

Ba’Naka, Shi-Queeta-Lee and Lena Lett (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

Spend any real time in the gay world and you know there are many who take drag very seriously, from the elaborate routines to the familial ties.

Since this weekend is Mother’s Day, we asked a few local performers why drag families are important. It didn’t take long to realize it’s about a lot more than borrowing lipstick or getting input on a new gown.

“It truly is family,” says Muffy Blake-Stephyns. “Few people know me quite as well as my drag family. We complete each other’s sentences, we know just what to say or do to comfort one another. We have each other’s back.”

“We’re closer than your actual blood relatives,” says Alexandra B. Childs. “We sew, rhinestone, glue, paint, staple, smile and lip sync our hearts out for one another. Our drag family hangs out together in and out of the drag scene. Drag events are like a weekly family reunion for us with a lot more hairspray and sequins involved than most others.”

“Drag families are just an elaborate support system,” Ba’Naka says. “A sisterhood that is there for you when you need it.”

 

Shi-Queeta Lee, drag, drag queen, gay news, Washington Blade

Shi-Queeta-Lee (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

Drag name: Shi-Queeta-Lee

Boy name: Jerry VanHook

Drag mother’s name: Chyna Pendar’vis/Benjamin Smith

How did you meet? I met Chyna Pendar’vis (RIP) through a friend of mine, Don Pendar’vis (RIP). I was competing for the Miss Magic Pageant 1998, which I won singing live Whitney Houston “Your Love Is My Love.” The pageant is part of the Gay Softball league here in D.C. called Chesapeake and Potomac Softball League (CAPS). I painted myself for it and Don came over to help me and he said, “Girl you look a hot ghetto mess.” So he calls Chyna to come and do my makeup and clothes. I was always told the first drag queen that paints you and put you in drag is your drag mother. She taught me the ropes on drag life and the drama that comes with it.

What does she mean to you? She means the world to me. Taught me so much on life in the gay community. How to get booked for drag shows, how to host to get patrons excited to see drag queens perform. She was a pageant girl, so she guided me on how to compete as well. Chyna was a diva at her craft, also had a loving family that supported the art form. I had a loving family that supported me.

 

Drag name: Kuji Lee

Boy name: Kuji Mah Ajani

Drag mother’s name: Shi-Queeta-Lee aka Jerry VanHook

How did you meet? I met my drag mom at a nightclub called “The Edge” that used to be located in Southeast Washington near the Navy Yard Marine Base. Shi-Queeta-Lee wasn’t born yet (I don’t believe), so the first three years of our interaction was with Jerry. Later I ran into her again and she introduced me as her child, which I didn’t dispute. It was then that I began to carry the last name “Lee.” A few years later, the birth of Shi-Queeta-Lee arrived in D.C. and started hosting a drag show at the famous Bachelor’s Mill. I was infatuated with drag performances for many years that I began to secretly desire to hit the stage as a male entertainer one day and Shi-Queeta-Lee was the first to give me my start.

What does she mean to you? Shi-Queeta-Lee is and will always be the catalyst of our family. She is also a well-known public figure who has endured ridicule, harsh criticism, etc. within our gay community for believing that the drag-gay/bi/transgender community can reach higher ground if presented in a different framework that connects all genders, all races. She embodies diversities, complexity, independence, boldness, unconditional love, vulnerability, creativity and more. She never let anyone or anything halt her goals or dreams and she makes sure we as her family apply those same beliefs.

 

Drag name: Shelby Blake-Stephyns

Boy name: Jon Rybka-Wachhaus

Drag mother’s name: Veronica Blake (Rob Amos)

How did you meet: I had been doing drag for approximately two years and had become a member of The Academy of Washington, Inc. We had become close and when my previous mother and I had a falling out, she asked me if I would be her daughter because she saw so much in me that wasn’t being nurtured and needed to be. And the rest, as they say is history.

What does your drag mother mean to you? Veronica means the world to me. Many times I get so many ideas in my head that it’s great to have someone there to help you sort it all out to make you the best you can be. She can be tough as leather sometimes but she always has my best interest at heart.

 

Daniel Hays, Muffy Blake Stephyns, gay news, Washington Blade

Daniel Hays A.K.A. Muffy Blake Stephyns (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

Drag name: Muffy Blake-Stephyns

Boy name: Daniel L. Hays

Drag mother’s name: Shelby Blake Stephyns/Jon Rybka-Wachhaus

How did you meet? I met Shelby at a benefit drag show at Freddie’s Beach Bar.  I had been doing drag for a number of years, but at that particular time I was going through some health challenges and was battling depression. She was just kind of the perfect prescription. She was incredibly caring, uplifting and made me want to continue performing. Over the next few weeks we talked pretty much every day. Before long it was official, I had changed “families” and Shelby became my mom. I think I can safely say that were it not for Shelby coming into my life, in all likelihood Muffy would have hung up her heels.

What does she mean to you? My drag mother truly means the world to me.  I know she loves me unconditionally and that is something that is felt in return. If I need something, I know without a doubt that if there is any way my drag mother can help she will be there, no questions asked. I am truly blessed to have Shelby Blake Stephyns as my mama.

 

Delila B. Lee, Howard Theater, drag, gay news, Washington Blade

Delila B. Lee (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

Drag name: Delila B. Lee

Boy name: Delonte’ Ladson

Drag mother’s name: Shi-Queeta-Lee/Jerry Vanhook

How did you meet?  I met Shi-Queeta-Lee in 2009 at Town Danceboutique. And I was amazed of the illusion she gave as Tina Turner. She got me into drag by teaching me how confidence is the key. And completely being myself. I was very interested in becoming a drag queen. The desire to transform into a beautiful diva and lip sync on stage. I first performed in 2011.

What does she mean to you? A drag family is being together, supporting and loving one another. It should be treasured forever. Most of us don’t have supportive families because they don’t accept and tolerate our lifestyles. Having a drag family means knowing you’ll be loved unconditionally. I’m proud to call Mother Lee my drag mother.

 

Ba'Naka, drag, drag queen, Town Danceboutique, gay news, LGBT Nightlife, Washington Blade

Ba’Naka (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

Drag name: Ba’Naka

Boy name: Dustin Michael Schaad

Drag mother’s name: When they say it takes a village they weren’t joking! I don’t have one singular drag mother. From Florida to D.C., I’ve collected a harem of Mommie Dearests but the most influential have been D.C. icons Lena Lett and Kristina Kelly (David Lett and Chris Smith).

How did you meet? I met Kristina Kelly at Apex when I first moved to D.C. She was the first queen to give me a chance in this city. I began regularly performing with her at various D.C. venues: Apex, Omega, Remington’s, Be-Bar. She taught me how to paint a face and take the stage. As for Lena, she has never been my official drag mother but I’ve learned more from her than any other. From her I learned how to host a show and command an audience (hosting is 10 times harder than performing). Lena over the years has given me some of the best advice (not that I always listen — I’m hard headed) that I have ever received.

What does she mean to you? My drag mothers have been a source of wisdom, experience and comfort over the years.

 

Drag name: Hope B. Childs

Boy name: Steven Ramsey

Drag mother’s name: Destiny B. Childs/Richard Legg

How did you meet? I met my drag mother years ago when I tried to commit suicide. She and her husband picked me up and let me live with them. She helped me become the true me. I started in the drag scene as her dresser and anywhere she went, I went. Rhinestoning her shoes and outfits and putting her outfits together. I first started doing drag without her really knowing (not a good idea to doing something behind your mother’s back). She helps me with whatever I need.

What does she mean to you? She is my best friend she means the world to me. She’s not my drag mom she is my mom.

 

Alexandra B. Childs, drag, drag queen, Town Danceboutique, LGBT Nightlife, gay news, Washington Blade, Miss Capital Pride 2012

Alexandra B. Childs (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)

Drag name: Alexandra B. Childs (Miss Capital Pride 2012)

Boy name: Chad Phillips

Drag mother’s name: Destiny B. Childs/Richard Legg

How did you meet? I met Destiny at Freddie’s Beach Bar in Crystal City, shortly after I moved to D.C. and came out. Theater was always something that I enjoyed and drag to me is an extension of that. I had toyed with the idea of trying drag and voiced it several times to some people. The first time I was put into drag was by Destiny’s drag mother, Ophelia Bottoms. After that it was something that I knew that I loved and the creativity is endless. Destiny took me in and gave me advice and sources for items and ideas to advance in the craft. And here I am, Miss Capital Pride 2012 about to step down and I owe it all to my mother and the family that we call the Childs clan!

What does she mean to you? Destiny/ Ric is more than a drag mother. We have a friendship that is more than just lashes and lipstick. Destiny is that person who knows my look from across the room, the one who is honest enough to say “Girl, not that hair,” the one who magically has the Mary Poppins “bag of stuff” if we forget something or need something. She is a person who in or out of drag consistently gives back to the community and those around her.

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Real Estate

D.C.’s housing reality: Cautious optimism meets landlord strain

Cost of living remains a major problem

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(Photo by sparky2000/Bigstock)

Washington has long prided itself on stability. Anchored by the federal government and buoyed by a highly educated workforce, the District has historically weathered economic uncertainty better than most cities.

But beneath that stability, cracks have been showing since January 2025.

I was having a conversation with a prospective client the other day and offered him a candid assessment of the District’s economic outlook. Simply put, structural challenges have been shaping the city’s future, a new mayoral election, and more that blends cautious optimism with clear concern about the changes ahead.

For one, the long-term shift toward remote and hybrid work continues to reshape the city in ways many people still underestimate. There has been a change in the rhythm of downtown D.C., reduced daytime foot traffic for local businesses, and created uncertainty for commercial real estate owners and the neighborhoods that depended on those workers every day.

At the same time, the cost of living in the District continues to rise at a pace that many residents are struggling to absorb. Even residents with strong incomes are becoming more cautious about spending and relocation decisions.

Landlords are feeling those pressures as well. Many smaller housing providers are operating in an environment where expenses continue to rise faster than revenue while the regulatory environment has grown increasingly complex. For some rental owners, especially those with older buildings or only a few rental units, the math is making it harder to cover costs, much less generate passive income. 

There is also growing concern about the District government’s own financial outlook. Significant budget pressures and spending cuts are being had in a more serious way than many Washingtonians are used to hearing. As uncertainty in federal employment affects local tax revenue and consumer confidence, how will the city fund services, infrastructure, housing programs, and public safety priorities in the years ahead? 

At the same time, consumer confidence feels noticeably down than it did even a few years ago. People are taking longer to make decisions, whether that means signing a lease, purchasing a home, renovating a property, or expanding a business. That hesitation creates a slower-moving marketplace where caution often replaces momentum. 

Despite all this, Washington has proven remarkably resilient over time. The city continues to attract talented professionals, international investment, universities, healthcare institutions, and industries tied to government, law, technology, and public policy. Neighborhoods continue to evolve, and demand for well-managed rental housing remains strong in the core areas of the city.

Unlike other major cities driven by private industry, federal employment and contracting are two of the main pillars of Washington’s economy. That reliance has long insulated the region from deep recessions. But it also creates vulnerability when federal activity slows.

D.C.’s economy is far more interconnected and interdependent than many people fully appreciate. Between significant federal layoffs, the District’s high unemployment rate, and broader economic uncertainty, there are a number of warning signs that property owners should be paying close attention to. When federal hiring slows or contracts tighten, the impact extends well beyond government workers themselves. It affects restaurants, retail, housing, and countless other sectors tied to the District’s economic activity. 

Brookings Institution has documented how job losses in higher-income sectors can disproportionately impact urban economies—precisely because those workers drive local spending.

Research from the Urban Institute supports this view, noting that federal workforce disruptions can quickly ripple through the region’s economy. For landlords and renters alike, those ripples are already being felt.  Renters see many more properties on the market which gives them leverage on negotiating discounts in rent or special incentives.  Housing providers, already squeezed by the reality of a weak economy and strong regulations face lowering rents and income.

For years, affordability has been one of D.C.’s most persistent challenges. Much of that pressure has been driven by strong job growth and sustained demand for housing at a pace that new housing inventory has struggled to match. That imbalance has steadily pushed rents and home prices higher, leaving many residents financially stretched.

Recent multifamily housing data suggests the market is already beginning to adjust. Developers delivered more than 15,000 apartment units across the Washington metropolitan area over the past year, and several industry reports have noted that elevated supply levels, combined with slower demand growth, have contributed to softer occupancy levels and downward pressure on rents in portions of the region. CoStar, CBRE, and Northmarq have all reported rising vacancy rates across segments of the D.C. multifamily market as newly delivered Class A inventory continues entering the pipeline at a time when hiring growth has moderated and federal workforce uncertainty has increased. 

At the same time, several economists and housing analysts have cautioned that the District’s affordability challenges are deeply structural and unlikely to disappear quickly. The Joint Center for Housing Studies of Harvard University has repeatedly identified Washington among the nation’s more cost-burdened metropolitan areas, particularly for renters, while Zillow data continues to show housing costs consuming a substantial percentage of household income for many residents.

From my own perspective as a property manager working directly in the market every day, I believe we are beginning to see the early stages of a market recalibration rather than a collapse. Anecdotally, there appears to be more competition among larger apartment buildings than there was several years ago, particularly in neighborhoods where substantial new inventory has recently delivered. That does not necessarily mean dramatic rent declines are coming, but it does suggest that the imbalance between supply and demand may be moderating somewhat after years of sustained upward pressure on pricing.

Even if prices soften, affordability will remain a long-term challenge.

Regulation and the Realities of Tenant Turnover

The same rental owner I spoke with pointed to regulatory hurdles as a major source of hesitation to continue renting out his property, given past bad experiences with tenants and excessive costs to prepare the rental for a new tenant.  

For many small property owners, the cumulative weight of regulation, maintenance costs, and market uncertainty is becoming harder to bear. Clients of mine have described feeling overwhelmed, not just financially, but emotionally. What was once a source of pride has, in some cases, become a source of stress.

We’re seeing more small landlords sell their rental homes, questioning whether it’s worth staying in the market. That’s a significant shift from even five or ten years ago. The National Multifamily Housing Council has noted that regulatory complexity often disproportionately impacts smaller landlords, who lack the resources of larger firms.

Some are choosing to sell. Others are simply trying to hold on. The result is the same – less rental housing for DC residents.

A Shift From Pride to Disillusionment

Perhaps the most striking theme is the emotional shift described by the property owner. For some, owning property in D.C., once a milestone achievement, has become a source of disillusionment. They cited financial losses, regulatory frustration, and a growing sense of political alienation.

There are also broader concerns about:

  • The decline of small multifamily ownership 
  • Rising foreclosures in certain segments 
  • Increased consolidation by larger institutional landlords 

If small landlords continue to exit the market, it changes the entire housing ecosystem. You lose diversity in housing options, and that can have long-term consequences for affordability.  It also robs families of having homes large enough to live in.

Politics and Policy: A System at a Standstill?

The political environment has obviously been a key factor shaping the city’s housing future. Following the 2026 elections, a lack of significant leadership change may result in continued policy stagnation.

Without meaningful policy shifts, we’re likely to see more of the same:  continued and increasing pressure on landlords and not enough study and focus on policies to increase housing supply by first stopping those property owners fleeing the District’s extreme tenant friendliness. The D.C. City Council remains central to these decisions, with advocacy groups continuing to push for expanded tenant protections. The importance of balance cannot be understated: ensuring protections for renters while maintaining a viable environment for housing providers.  

Taken together, these dynamics point to a housing system at a crossroads.

D.C. must find a way to balance:

  • Tenant protections 
  • Housing affordability 
  • Landlord sustainability 
  • Long-term investment in housing supply 

What’s Next?

D.C. isn’t going anywhere. The question is how it adapts. If we can find the right balance, there’s a path forward, but it’s going to take time and thoughtful policy decisions. For landlords, that path will require adaptability and engagement. For renters, it may mean gradual rather than immediate relief. For policymakers, it presents a clear challenge: create a system that works for everyone.

Scott Bloom is owner and senior property manager of Columbia Property Management. Contact him via ColumbiaPM.com.

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Real Estate

Introducing Next-Generation Assisted Living & Memory Support.

Now Available in Tysons: Kokua at The Mather

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We have good news for those seeking assisted living or memory support for a loved one: a fresh, hospitality-driven approach to care is now available in the heart of Tysons, Virginia. Kokua at The Mather opened in fall 2025 and provides residents with collaborative care as well as everyday possibilities for creativity, purpose, and connection. 

For a limited time, Kokua is welcoming new residents with exclusive move-in incentives. 

“Kokua is a Hawaiian word meaning ‘To extend help to others without expecting anything in return,’” explains Brandon Davidson, Administrator. “If you’re seeking support for a loved one, Kokua is worth a closer look. We take an individualized approach to care, with evidence-based practices provided by a dedicated, interdisciplinary team.” 

LIMITED-TIME OPPORTUNITY

“At Kokua, we focus on the individual. We blend care with our research-driven approach to deliver personalized wellness tailored to residents’ needs and preferences,” says Davidson. 

Residents enjoy the freedom to choose from enriching programs, meaningful social opportunities with experiences such as sensory walks, meditation, acupuncture, Reiki, songwriting workshops, poetry readings, Sensory Symphony Swim, and more.

Assisted Living in Ādar

Ādar means “respect”, and Kokua delivers. Comfortable residential living is combined with caring assisted living services, enabling residents to remain as independent as possible. Each one-bedroom apartment home (ranging in size up to nearly 900 square feet) offers generous space and thoughtful design, complemented by assistance with daily living tasks and emergency response systems for peace of mind. 

Memory Support in Miran

Miran means “peaceful”—another pillar in the Kokua way of life. Private suites are designed for those with mild to moderate Alzheimer’s disease, dementia, or similar cognitive conditions. “Our person-centered approach embraces individual strengths and needs, with an interdisciplinary team that includes a staff member in attendance 24 hours a day to assist with event reminders and activities of daily living,” says Davidson. “Residents have access to a variety of opportunities to connect, express, and explore their potential through social events, wellness programs, creative arts, and more.”

Kokua offers the next generation of care in these areas, with a commitment to highly personalized service. 

INSPIRED AMENITIES & BOUTIQUE SERVICE

Nestled in a lively urban neighborhood, Kokua incorporates biophilic design that brings the outside in to enhance health and wellbeing. 

Throughout Kokua, residents enjoy a collection of thoughtfully designed spaces and top-shelf hospitality in an upscale community. Beautifully appointed gathering spaces create flexible opportunities for wellness, connection, and everyday enjoyment. A spacious outdoor terrace, demonstration kitchens, art and music studios, and more are used for an array of programs and are available to residents and their visitors. Multiple restaurants offer chef-prepared cuisine with flexible, open-hour service.

“Here at Kokua, we’re offering the next generation of care in Ādar and Miran, and it’s available to the public for a limited time,” says Davidson. Now is an ideal time to explore the personalized care and quiet luxury that Kokua at The Mather has to offer.

For more information, download a brochure at www.themathertysons.com/kokua. To schedule a visit or for additional details, contact Kokua at [email protected] or (571) 282.3650.

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Autos

A magical Mercedes

S-Class continues to define what luxury really means

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Mercedes S-Class

At my stage of life — “somewhere between 40 and death,” as the iconic line goes in the musical “Mame” — I want some pampering. A lot of pampering. 

Luckily, for anyone who constantly craves a soothing spa, steam room or sauna, there’s the completely updated Mercedes S-Class. This flagship sedan is now so full of glitz, glamour, and gee-whiz gadgetry, it gives new meaning to the term “auto erotica.” 

Does this make the S-Class a “gay” ride? For me, any vehicle that pushes my buttons like this one is a Kinsey 6.

MERCEDES S-CLASS

$122,000 (est.)

MPG: 21 city/31 highway

0 to 60 mph: 4.3 seconds

Trunk space: 19 cu. ft. 

PROS: Exceptional comfort. Ultra-quiet cabin. Cutting-edge safety.

CONS: Price climbs fast. Tech learning curve. Sportier competitors.    

The S-Class continues to define what luxury really means, with a bolder silhouette, larger grille, and striking, next-gen LED headlights. There’s also an optional illuminated Mercedes star on the hood. Overall, nearly 2,700 parts are new or improved, so more than 50 percent of this vehicle has been updated. An extreme makeover, to be sure. 

At the same time, this latest S-Class leans harder into intelligence and electrification than ever before. Under the hood, a range of turbocharged inline-six and V8 engines — paired with mild-hybrid systems — deliver power in a way that seems almost edited for smoothness. Braking is solid and strong, too, but never abrupt. All the engineering is fine-tuned and intentional.

Yes, the top-of-the line S580 version is more expensive, almost $140,000. But it’s also blisteringly fast, zipping from 0 to 60 mph in just 3.9 seconds. That’s as lickety-split swift as a Lamborghini Revuelto supercar, which has a starting MSRP of $610,000 and can easily exceed — yowza! — $800,000.

Colors? There are 150 to choose from for the exterior and 400 for the interior. You can even customize the illuminated door sills, interior stitching and wheel accents.

And the ride quality? Sublime. Adaptive air suspension reads the road constantly, leveling out imperfections before they even register. Rear-axle steering enhances maneuverability, making this full-sized sedan feel surprisingly nimble in tight spaces. On the highway, the S-Class simply glides like a private yacht on the calmest of seas — extremely quiet, composed and completely unbothered.

Whenever you slide inside, the cabin immediately sets the tone. A massive OLED digital display — the same high-def technology used for cinematic viewing and gaming monitors — anchors the dashboard, running the latest MBUX infotainment interface. Highly customizable, this software allows for advanced voice commands that feel natural, not forced. And an augmented-reality navigation system takes your route and overlays it onto live camera feeds. It’s intuitive — mostly, as there is a learning curve for all this cutting-edge gear. Overall, though, such amenities make older setups feel like dial-up internet. 

A Burmester surround-sound stereo is available in 3D or 4D, with up to 31 speakers, 1,690 watts and tactile transducers in the seats that vibrate and pulse with the music. Those seats are, of course, extremely comfortable. And the seatbelts? These are now heated. 

Let’s not forget the latest cabin air-filtration system, which can remove ultra-fine particles to deliver air quality that rivals medical environments. Clean air, yes, but even this seems like a special treat. It’s like being swaddled in couture, not ready-to-wear. 

And lastly, there’s the rear-seat area, which — to be honest — is where the S-Class really shines. Executive packages offer multi-contour reclining seats with rapid heating and ventilating, heated armrests and massage functions. You can opt for a footrest, which ups the glam factor to give you a calf massage. Dual 13.1-inch display screens come with their own remote controls. There’s also a video-conferencing feature, to help transform the rear cabin into a fully connected mobile office. For me, it feels less “back seat” and more “private lounge.” 

Even in fiction, high-tech luxury carries weight. Tony Stark helped cement the idea that state-of-the art vehicles can be aspirational, not just practical. The magical S-Class fits right into that narrative — minus the flying suit (for now).

Mercedes S-Class interior
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