Arts & Entertainment
Best of Gay D.C. 2017: PEOPLE
Winners from the Washington Blade’s annual poll

(Washington Blade photos by Michael Key)
Local Hero
Gavin Grimm
The American Civil Liberties Union in 2015 filed a federal lawsuit on behalf of Gavin Grimm, who was a student at Gloucester County High School in Gloucester, Va., at the time.
Grimm and his lawyers argued the Gloucester County School District’s policy that prohibited him from using the boys restroom or locker room because they were not consistent with his “biological gender” is unconstitutional under the 14th Amendment’s Equal Protection Clause. The lawsuit also alleged the regulation violated Title IX of the U.S. Education Amendments of 1972 that prohibits schools receiving federal funds from discriminating on the basis of sex.
The Justice Department under the Obama administration argued in Grimm’s case that Title IX requires school districts to allow trans students to use restrooms that correspond to their gender identity. The Department of Education’s Office of the General Council at the time also filed a brief in support of Grimm.
The 4th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals in Richmond — which is the first federal appeals court to consider whether Title IX allows trans students to use facilities that are consistent with their gender identity — in April 2016 ruled in favor of Grimm. The Gloucester County School District subsequently announced it planned to petition the U.S. Supreme Court to hear the case.
The Supreme Court last October said it would hear Grimm’s case. Oral arguments were scheduled to take place on March 28, but the justices remanded the case to the 4th Circuit after President Trump rescinded the Title IX guidance.
The 4th Circuit in July sent Grimm’s case back to the U.S. District Court for the Eastern District of Virginia. The ACLU subsequently withdrew Grimm’s request for an immediate injunction against the Gloucester County School Board policy.
Grimm, 18, graduated from Gloucester County High School in June.
“I am in this for the long haul,” he said in an ACLU press release that announced the decision to amend his case. “I remain hopeful that my case will help make sure that other transgender students are able to attend school safely and without discrimination.”
Grimm in February was among those who spoke at a White House protest that corresponded with Trump’s decision to rescind the Title IX guidance.
“We will not be silenced and that we will stand with and protect trans youth,” said Grimm, speaking through tears with his mother standing by his side. “No matter what happens, no one, not even the government can even defeat a community so full of live, color, diversity and most importantly love.”
Equality Virginia and GLAAD are among the organizations that have honored Grimm over the last year.
— MICHAEL K. LAVERS

Gavin Grimm (Photo by Scout Turankjian; courtesy Wikimedia Commons)
Best Amateur Athlete
Mark Hofberg, D.C. Gay Flag Football
Runner-up: Grace Thompson, D.C. Front Runners (last year’s winner)

Mark Hoffberg (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)
Best Artist
John Jack Gallagher
Runner-up: Glenn Fry
John Jack Gallagher has been taking photos since his first boyfriend gave him a 35-millimeter camera for his birthday more than 30 years ago. In 2012, he started shooting professionally after members of the Stonewall Kickball team he’d been photographing insisted he shoot their wedding. This is his second consecutive win in this category. (JD)

John Jack Gallagher (Photo courtesy of John Jack Photography)
Best Businessperson
Dr. Gregory Jones
Capital Center for Psychotherapy & Wellness
1330 U St., N.W.
Runner-up: Bob Witeck

Dr. Gregory Jones (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)
Best Clergy
Bishop Allyson Abrams
Abrams reclaims her 2015 title after being last year’s runner-up. Abrams is the founder and pastor of Empowerment Liberation Cathedral in Silver Spring.
Runner-up: Rayceen Pendarvis (last year’s winner)

Bishop Allyson Abrams (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)
Most Committed Activist
Ruby Corado
Corado was named Best of Gay D.C. Local Heroine in 2014 and Most Committed Activist in 2015.
Casa Ruby
2822 Georgia Ave., N.W.
Runner-up: Jason Lindsay

Ruby Corado (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)
Best D.C. Public Official
Mayor Muriel Bowser
Runner-up: Randy Downs

D.C. Mayor Muriel Bowser (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)
Best Hill Staffer/LGBT Bureaucrat
Yesenia Chavez
Runner-up: Scott Filter
Yesenia Chavez identifies as queer. She got her start on Capitol Hill interning with the Victory Fund during her senior year at the University of Houston. After graduating with a degree in political science, she returned to the Hill in 2013 to work as a professional staffer for Arizona Congressman Raul Grijalva. “Typically, I handle LGBT policy and push my boss on different efforts like the LGBT Data Inclusion ACT,” she says.
Chavez also serves on the board of LGBT Congressional Staff Association.
“For the past three years I’ve been coordinating events,” she says. “Our goal is to increase the professional development growth of members interns, fellow and staff on the Hill on the House side.”
“It’s important to have queer women of color at the table,” says Chavez, 26. “We’re a smaller contingency on the Hill. We must make sure we’re safe there.”
Chavez recently bought a home with her partner in D.C.’s Eckington neighborhood and is looking to put down roots.
“Washington is an interesting place to live. Young professionals come her because they feel passionate about giving back and doing something to make the country a better place, despite their political leaning. I don’t have the same conversation here that I have with people at back in Texas.” (PF)

Yesenia Chavez (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)
Best Local Pro Athlete
Bryce Harper, Washington Nationals
Last year’s runner up!
Runner-up: John Wall, Washington Wizards

Bryce Harper (Photo by Arturo Pardavila III; courtesy Wikimedia Commons)
Best Local Pro Sports Team
Washington Nationals
Editor’s choice: D.C. United

(Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)
Best Massage
Ben Auman
Runner-up: Jacob Gough
Ben Auman says he “values connections over everything else.” That’s what led him to a successful and fulfilling career as a massage therapist.
“I’m making connections with people I never would have gotten to make connections with before,” he says.
Auman moved to D.C. from North Carolina in 2005 and worked as a non-profit association manager and financial consultant. Helping his clients with their goal setting and financial planning led him to follow his own true passion: massage therapy. He studied at the Potomac Massage Training Institute and is now a Massage Therapist at Logan 14 Aveda Lifestyle Salon/Spa and the owner of Auman Massage Therapy.
Switching careers gave Auman a whole new perspective on life. “Before, getting up and going to work was a way to get paid. Now, I’m getting up every morning to do something I love and that I’m passionate about. It’s very fulfilling.” (BTC)

Ben Auman (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)
Best Fitness Instructor
Jared Keith Lee
Runner-up: Grace Thompson
After relocating from New York to Washington, Jared Keith Lee felt out of place in his new surroundings, and longed for a feeling of belonging. He found what he was looking for at SoulCycle.
“I left my job as a graphic designer to become a SoulCycle instructor,” he says. “I was having a hard time finding my own way here and a place that fit. At SoulCycle people were accepting. And it was fun.”
With inspirational coaching, loud music, candle light and a full body workout (they’ve added hand weights and core work), SoulCycle is indoor cycling re-invented.
“The music and lighting allows riders to separate from their inhibitions and insecurities. It’s an individual journey, and we welcome all levels of experience,” says Lee who’s been an instructor for two years and currently works at SoulCycle’s 14th and U and Mount Vernon locations.
Lee grew up in Virginia Beach, Va. He won a soccer scholarship to Hampden-Sydney College in Farmville, Va. And while he came out in his freshman year there, Lee never felt at home on the conservative campus, so he transferred to Maryland Institute College of Art in Baltimore to study photography and design. (PF)

Jared Keith Lee (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)
Best Real Estate Agent
Valerie Blake
Runner-up: Stacey Williams-Zeiger
Valerie Blake has sold real estate professionally in the D.C. area for 20 years.
Blake’s eclectic former positions include working as a diplomat overseas, a federal government executive and an adult education administrator for a training school in the federal government. She has lived in 12 states, D.C. and two foreign countries.
For Blake, working in the region is a great match.
“I think that there are so many people who are transients here that provide an opportunity to meet a lot of people that I would not get the opportunity to do otherwise,” Blake, who also won this award in 2015, says.” They come from all walks of life which really helps with my varied background because I’ve found that there are very few people that I can’t find something in common with. That’s one of the things that I think makes me help them.”
Blake, a straight ally and regular Blade contributor, has serviced the LGBT community since 1999.
“They have been a continued source of great clients and wonderful friends over the years,” Blake says.
As for her best tip for buying a home in the area, she says it’s all about balance.
“Find out how much of a mortgage you’re approved for and then reduce it so that you can continue to have a life as well as a house,” Blake says. (MC)
Valerie Blake
11 Dupont Circle, N.W.

Valerie Blake (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)
Best Real Estate Group
The Bediz Group, Keller Williams
1918 18th St., N.W.
Runner-up: The Evan and Mark Team, Compass

(Photo courtesy of the Bediz Group)
Best Rehoboth Real Estate Agent
Chris Beagle
Third consecutive win in this category!
Runner-up: Andy Staton

Chris Beagle (Washington Blade photo by Daniel Truitt)
Best Straight Ally
Pamala Stanley
Runner-up: Muriel Bowser
Singer Pamala Stanley joins an elite group as this year’s Best Straight Ally. Past title holders include everyone from Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton to local allies such as Meghan Davies (Whitman-Walker), Leigh Ann Hendricks (Level One) and Phil Hicks (PFLAG).
Stanley is beloved for her string of Billboard Hot Dance Club Play hits such as “This is Hot,” “I Don’t Want to Talk About It,” “Coming Out of Hiding” and more in the late ‘70s through the mid-‘80s.
Stanley says it’s hard to convey why she’s always felt so strongly at home with her gay fans.
“There’s a love for life there. They listen to what you have to say and you can really be yourself,” the dance diva says. “Years ago with the straight crowd, I felt there were certain things I couldn’t talk about — dating, life, men. I had to always make sure that I kept it a certain way. But when I played for the gay crowd, I could tell them anything — good, bad, whatever, and they just got a big kick out of it. They didn’t judge, they just loved you no matter what you were doing and … I think I needed that. They were always very good to me and just fun people.”
Stanley splits her time between her home on Virginia’s Eastern Shore and Rehoboth Beach, Del., where she performs year around at tea dances, jazz brunches, private parties and more. She’s at the Blue Moon (35 Baltimore Ave., Rehoboth Beach, Del.) every Sunday and Monday and says she’s grateful to be in demand.
“I’m very busy here,” she says. “I’m lucky.” (JD)

Pamala Stanley (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)
Best Transgender Advocate
Sarah McBride
Runner-up: Gavin Grimm
By any measure, Sarah McBride has an impressive resume and an amazing list of accomplishments.
She first came to national attention in 2012 when she came out as transgender while serving as student body president at American University. Following her graduation, she interned at the Obama White House, becoming the first openly transgender woman to work there in any capacity. When McBride spoke at the 2016 Democratic National Convention in Philadelphia, she became the first openly transgender person to address the national convention of major political party.
McBride, who also won this category last year, has worked on LGBT issues at the Canter for American Progress and is currently the National Press Secretary for the Human Rights Campaign. A native of Wilmington, Del., she is also on the board of Equality Delaware and is widely credited with leading the successful effort to add gender identity and expression to her state’s nondiscrimination and hate-crimes laws.
McBride describes herself as an “outgoing introvert” and says that some of her major influences are Barack Obama, Franklin Roosevelt, Carl Sagan, Hilary Clinton and Abraham Lincoln. She dedicates her fierce activism to her late husband Andrew Cray, a transgender man and fellow advocate. They met when McBride was working at the White House. Cray was diagnosed with terminal cancer in 2014, and just days after they married, he died. His death instilled in McBride a firm belief in the urgency of political and social change.
Her first book “Tomorrow Will Be Different” will be published in March. (BTC)
Human Rights Campaign Fund
1640 Rhode Island Ave., N.W.

Sarah McBride speaking at the 2016 Democratic National Convention. (Blade photo by Michael Key)
Best Stylist
Quency Valencia
Second consecutive win in this category!
Salon Quency
1534 U St. N.W. No. 1
Runner-up: Bryan Smith

Quency Valencia (Washington Blade photo by Michael Key)
To see winners in other categories in the Washington Blade’s Best of Gay D.C. 2017 Awards, click here.
Friday, September 4
Go Gay DC will host “LGBTQ+ Community Happy Hour” at 7 p.m. at Freddie’s Beach Bar and Restaurant.This is a chance to relax, make new friends, and enjoy happy hour specials at this classic retro venue. Attendance is free and more details are available on Eventbrite.
Saturday, September 5
Go Gay DC will host “LGBTQ+ Community Brunch” at 11 a.m. at Freddie’s Beach Bar & Restaurant. This fun weekly event brings the DMV area LGBTQ+ community, including allies, together for delicious food and conversation. Attendance is free and more details are available on Eventbrite.
Sunday, September 6
“Nellie’s DC Drag Brunch” will be at 12 p.m. at Nellie’s Sports Bar. Come get served like a queen by a queen. Join Sapphire Blue, Deja Diamond and their team of amazing drag performers for the most fun you’ll have all weekend. Tickets cost $58.51 and are available on Eventbrite.
Monday, September 7
Go Gay DC will host “Out in Rosslyn LGBTQ+ Community Social” at 6 p.m. at Hyatt Centric Arlington. We have been invited to visit Hyatt Centric Arlington, where we will gather in a reserved section of their lounge. Attendees will be greeted by members of the Go Gay DC Leadership Team & receive a name tag upon arrival. This event is ideal for meeting new folks, making new friends, community-building, or just to unwind and enjoy the atmosphere. Casual attire is perfectly fine. More details are available on Eventbrite.
Tuesday, September 8
Coming Out Discussion Group will be at 7 p.m. on Zoom. This is a safe space to share experiences about coming out and discuss topics as it relates to doing so — by sharing struggles and victories the group allows those newly coming out and who have been out for a while to learn from others. For more details, visit the group’s Facebook.
Trans Discussion Group will be at 7 p.m. on Zoom. This event is intended to provide an emotionally and physically safe space for trans people and those who may be questioning their gender identity/expression to join together in community and learn from one another. For more details, email [email protected].
Wednesday, September 9
Job Club will be at 6 p.m. on Zoom upon request. This is a weekly job support program to help job entrants and seekers, including the long-term unemployed, improve self-confidence, motivation, resilience and productivity for effective job searches and networking — allowing participants to move away from being merely “applicants” toward being “candidates.” For more information, email [email protected] or visit thedccenter.org/careers.
Thursday, September 10
The DC LGBTQ+ Community Center’s Fresh Produce Program will be held all day at the DC LGBTQ+ Community Center. People will be informed on Wednesday at 5 p.m. if they are picked to receive a produce box. No proof of residency or income is required. For more information, email [email protected] or call 202-682-2245.
Virtual Yoga Class will be at 7 p.m. on Zoom. This free weekly class is a combination of yoga, breathwork and meditation that allows LGBTQ+ community members to continue their healing journey with somatic and mindfulness practices. For more details, visit the DC LGBTQ+ Community Center’s website.
Gloria Steinem, writer, activist, and a leading voice of the feminist movement in the 1970s, died on Wednesday in Manhattan. Her death was announced on Instagram by her official foundation, Gloria’s Foundation, which shared that Steinem “passed away peacefully at her home, surrounded by some of the many who loved her.” She was 92.
A leading figure and spokesperson for the second-wave feminist movement, running from the 1960s through the ’80s — the earlier women’s rights suffrage movement being considered the first — Gloria Steinem campaigned for workplace equality, equality in the home and reproductive freedom, seeing those struggles as inseparable from the wider causes of social and racial equality.
She also championed LGBTQ rights, supporting lesbian visibility within the larger women’s liberation movement, and standing in opposition to the idea that lesbians posed a “lavender menace” to the cause of feminism.
In her vision of the future, marriage equality was a given: “Lesbians or homosexuals will no longer be denied legally binding marriages, complete with mutual-support agreements and inheritance rights.”
GLAAD President Sarah Kate Ellis said in a statement following Steinem’s death: “Gloria Steinem was a trailblazing titan of civil rights whose vision for liberation bridged the movements for gender equality, bodily autonomy, and LGBTQ rights. She recognized that feminist progress is incomplete without full inclusion and stood as an ally to transgender people’s fight for equality. Gloria rejected rigid binaries, choosing instead to build bridges of empathy and coalition across all marginalized identities. Gloria’s life was a masterclass in coalition-building, courage, and unconditional empathy.”
Among her many trailblazing milestones, Steinem was widely known for co-founding the National Women’s Political Caucus in 1971 alongside foundational feminist figures Bella Abzug, Shirley Chisholm, Betty Friedan, Fannie Lou Hamer, LaDonna Harris, Mildred Jeffrey, and Jill Ruckelshaus.
The mandate: get women into political office and positions of power — “women who are committed to the causes of other women — not women who are going to just imitate the male politics as it has been practiced all these years complete with elitism, racism and prejudice against women,” she said, “but women who really care about their sisters and will work for social reform.”
“This is no simple reform. It really is a revolution.”
Liz Abzug, daughter of Bella Abzug, remembers Steinem as “a lifelong activist and a humanist with lots of love to give,” as well as “a very, very close and dear friend of my mother’s,” as the two “worked side by side to change the American landscape for women.”
“It’s hard for me and all of her other supporters and admirers to imagine a world without Gloria leading the charge and fighting for women’s rights and full gender equality,” Abzug shared.
Indeed, there was much about that American landscape in need of change. Steinem came up during a time when discrimination against women was the legal and societal norm.
A married woman, for instance, often required her husband’s signature to obtain a credit card, a form of gender discrimination remedied in 1974 with the Equal Credit Opportunity Act. Women were often unable to get jobs. Life turned Steinem down, saying “We don’t want a pretty girl, we want a writer. Get out of here.” If women did land a job, in 1973, they would have likely made 56.6 cents to every dollar that men earned.
The law’s failure to support women’s autonomy was especially visible on the matter of reproductive rights.
For many women in America, legal abortion remained unavailable until 1973, when Roe v. Wade established a constitutional right to abortion nationwide. Steinem spent years speaking out for women’s safety, and promoted the idea that “decision-making power over our own physical selves” was intertwined with equal regard for women as citizens.
“The vast majority of women support safe and legal abortion. My response is if those legislators were half women, this wouldn’t happen,” she said in a 2022 interview with Katie Couric. “If we actually had a democracy, if those legislators looked like the country from a gender, racial, and class perspective, this probably would not be happening…”
Gloria Marie Steinem was born on March 25, 1934, in Toledo, Ohio, the daughter of Leo and Ruth (Nuneviller) Steinem. Her father was an antiques salesman; her mother had worked for a newspaper before she got married, but suffered what was called at the time a “nervous breakdown” and spent time in an institution. Following a divorce, her mother was left largely in the care of 11-year-old Gloria Steinem in a house that has been described as infested by vermin.
“I didn’t go to school a full year until I was 11 or 12, so I lived in books. I really was an observer of life,” Steinem said in a 2011 interview.
After moving to D.C. to live with her older sister, Susanne, Steinem graduated from Western High School in 1952. She followed Susanne to Smith College where she studied government and wrote for the student newspaper, graduating in 1956.
Upon moving to New York in 1960, she worked for Help! magazine and wrote freelance for publications that included Life, Esquire, and Glamour. According to Smith College Libraries, she co-founded New York magazine in 1968 and served as political columnist until 1972. In the 1960s and ’70s, Steinem was active in causes that included United Farmworkers, Vietnam War Tax Protest, and Committee for the Legal Defense of Angela Davis. She also participated in the political campaigns of Adlai Stevenson, Robert Kennedy, Shirley Chisholm, and others.
Steinem is said to have found her way to the Women’s Movement in 1969, following an abortion “speak-out” meeting of the Redstockings. She was inspired to begin speaking to audiences across the country, alongside activist Dorothy Pitman Hughes, and later Florynce Kennedy and Margaret Sloan.
Among Steinem’s most enduring legacies, and still in publication today, is Ms. magazine, which she co-founded. Widely considered the first national American feminist magazine (and owned, operated, and written by women!), it first appeared as a preview insert in New York Magazine in December 1971 with a tagline, “The New Magazine for Women.” Ms. earned status as a full-on publication in July 1972 with a cover image depicting a modern pregnant Hindu goddess Kali holding a clock, skillet, typewriter, rake, mirror, telephone, steering wheel, and an iron.
Ms. is credited with raising cultural awareness on policy issues, like the Equal Rights Amendment, taking on taboo topics and putting women’s issues front and center.
Steinem’s long list of published work includes the 1983 bestselling book Outrageous Acts and Everyday Rebellions, a collection of her Ms. articles and other pieces. The book includes the feminist’s essay on her undercover exposé of the Playboy Club, for which she donned bunny ears, collar, and bow to covertly report on working conditions for women.
In 1986, she published “Marilyn: Norma Jeane,” which explored the life of Marilyn Monroe and the idea of women as vulnerable and at the disposal of society — men in particular.
Steinem also wrote “Revolution from Within” (1992); “Moving Beyond Words” (1994); and “Doing Sixty & Seventy” (2006). She was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom in 2013 by President Barack Obama.
Steinem’s relationships over the years included Ted Sorensen, counselor to President John F. Kennedy; Stanley Pottinger, a Justice Department official; and publisher and real-estate businessman Mort Zuckerman. In 2000, she married South African businessman David Bale, who died in 2003.
Steinem was predeceased by her mother and her sister, Susanne Steinem Patch, who died in 2007. On multiple occasions, she spoke of a community that extended beyond birth family — people whom she chose, and who chose her.
“[Feminism is] about friends and sisters and community,” Steinem said in an interview with bell hooks. “The good part and the great part is that it’s about chosen family. We have each other’s backs and that is so precious.
In announcing Steinem’s passing, her foundation offered this reflection: “Gloria’s greatest gift was her ability to listen to others, to make others feel seen and heard. Her words, actions, and example gave people permission to be their truest selves. Gloria lived true to her independent spirit, always with curiosity and a great sense of humor.
“She spent her recent years doing the two things she loved most: being in community with others and writing … Gloria loved the tradition of lighting signal fires on hills to light the way to the other side of the mountain.”
a&e features
The mastery of love
The world knows Eric Anderson as Billy Porter’s partner, but in Rehoboth Beach, he has a story entirely his own
The world knows Eric Anderson as Billy Porter’s partner. In Rehoboth Beach, Del., he has a life — and a story — entirely his own.
My first time with Eric Anderson was hot — very hot. Before he arrived, I sat waiting, overthinking everything. When he finally appeared in a loose-fitting T-shirt and purple shorts, I understood why he attracts attention. Eric is the kind of man who changes the energy of a room simply by entering it.
After a quick hello, we got right to it. Techno pulsed through the room as Eric told me how to move, where to place my hands, when to breathe. My heart pounded. My muscles ached. I bent, twisted, and stretched while sweat ran down my back and burned my eyes. I didn’t bother wiping it away.
To be clear, Eric and I were not alone. Five other people were with us — and the yoga studio at SoulFire Collective in Rehoboth Beach was heated to 87 degrees.
“If you are always racing toward the next moment, what happens to the one you’re in?” Eric asked, opening his power yoga class and inviting us to leave whatever had followed us through the door and surrender to the present. Surrender did not come easily. At 58, I’ve done enough yoga to know the difference between discomfort and imminent death. Halfway through Eric’s relentless flow, the distinction began to blur.
A playlist of techno and remixed pop — including “Live Like You Were Dying” — carried us from one demanding pose to the next. Eric moved among the mats with the energy of a nightclub DJ and the calm of someone who trusted our bodies to go further than our minds believed possible. Nearly an hour later, when the music softened and I collapsed onto my back in savasana, he laid a cool cloth across my forehead. I exhaled — relieved, and maybe a little disappointed, that my first time with Eric was over.
At the end of my mat, a handwritten note congratulated me on my first class and invited me back — a small benediction after the storm. Then Eric closed the class by repeating the question with which he’d opened. For a man whose relationship with actor and singer Billy Porter has drawn him unexpectedly into the public eye, it sounded less like a yoga mantra than a personal creed.
The next time I meet Eric, there is air conditioning and caffeine. We are at Starbucks, where I deliberately order the largest drinks available, as though volume alone might buy me more time. He chooses a matcha, and I order herbal tea. My heart is pounding again, faster than the soft rock drifting from the speakers above us. Although I’ve already spent more than an hour with Eric, I know almost nothing about the man I’m about to interview.
Neither, it seems, does anyone else.
Celebrity outlets offer a handful of biographical details: a Rehoboth Beach teacher and yoga instructor with a master’s degree from Columbia University. Gay publications have been less restrained. One introduced him as Billy Porter’s “total hot stud,” called him “a snacc,” and praised his ability to “rock a Speedo.” Queerty distilled Eric’s identity to five words: “Porter is dating a teacher.”
All of it tells me how the world sees him. None of it tells me who he is.
I know from our text exchanges that Eric is slammed for time. He is scheduled to travel to New York later that day and fly to WorldPride Amsterdam the following afternoon. Billy is among the headliners for the opening-night Unity Concert and is also slated to perform at the Wedding Party XXL alongside KI/KI, Bimini, and the Vengaboys. Eric still has to pack. This, I’m beginning to understand, is part of loving someone famous: there is almost always an itinerary, another city, and a specific time and place Billy needs to be. Even here, with two untouched drinks between us, the clock is ticking.

As soon as we sit down, I open my laptop, ready to get to work. My mind is focused on the list of questions I’ve prepared, and I’ve already anticipated the shape of most of his responses. Then I look up and see Eric sitting perfectly still, smiling, and taking in the moment. He hasn’t even taken a sip of his matcha yet.
I quietly close my laptop and breathe.
Within minutes, the interview softens into a conversation.
Eric earned a bachelor’s degree in history from the University of Delaware and a master’s in public school leadership from Teachers College, Columbia University. He began his career teaching mathematics before moving into school administration, eventually serving as vice president of the Charter School of Wilmington and head of school at Sussex Academy. Today, he teaches mathematics and social studies in the Cape Henlopen School District. He also coaches soccer and leads yoga classes at SoulFire Collective in Rehoboth Beach.
His return to the classroom was deliberate. Eric knows some people assumed there must be a story behind his leaving administration—that he had done something wrong or that teaching represented a demotion.
“I want to make it clear that I went back to teaching by choice,” he says.
As a child, Eric played school. Teaching has always felt natural to him, less like an occupation than an expression of who he is. Administration was different.
“It felt like work,” he says. “It wasn’t where my passion was, and it didn’t bring me joy. Going back into the classroom was simply me choosing joy.”
The more Eric talks, the clearer it becomes that teaching is not merely a job but a vocation. His mother is white and his father is Black, and growing up biracial was not always easy. “I saw the best and the worst of both,” he tells me. Those experiences helped shape his desire to become a teacher — to be the kind of person who could make a meaningful difference in a young person’s life.
Just then, Eric glances over his shoulder and locks eyes with someone across the room. He waves and flashes what is quickly becoming his signature smile. My first thought is that someone has recognized him as Billy Porter’s partner.
I’m wrong. It’s one of his former students.
Inevitably, our conversation turns to love — and to Billy. I’ve made it clear that I’m here to write about Eric, not Billy Porter. But separating the two entirely would be as artificial as defining Eric only by their relationship. Billy is now an essential part of his story.
Eric met Billy at a Christmas party hosted by mutual friends who had been trying to introduce them all night. It wasn’t easy — the party was crowded, and the two men never quite crossed paths. Eric stayed for the afterparty, where a friend nudged him and nodded toward the room: Billy was looking his way. Romance never crossed his mind.
Eventually, they started talking. Eric has never had much patience for small talk, and he wasn’t interested in cataloging which celebrities Billy knew. He skipped it entirely and went straight for the deeper questions — what Billy believed, how he saw the world, what mattered to him. They ended up at the kitchen table, trading life philosophies until 5 a.m.
What struck Eric most wasn’t the conversation’s length. It was its depth. Billy wasn’t who he expected. Neither was the conversation. By the time the sun was coming up, Eric was less surprised that they’d talked all night than by how much, it turned out, they had in common.
They had dinner the following evening, and Billy invited Eric to spend the weekend with him in New York. There, Billy took him to see Nicole Scherzinger in “Sunset Boulevard.” Right before the show started, he casually introduced Eric to a friend named Katy. Back in their seats, Eric asked how Billy knew her.
“BITCH,” Billy replied, “that is Miss K-A-T-Y P-E-R-R-Y!”
For all the glamour surrounding their courtship, Eric describes the foundation of their relationship in decidedly spiritual terms. His favorite book is don Miguel Ruiz’s The Mastery of Love, which explores how fear, expectation, and the need for approval can distort relationships. Its philosophy closely resembles Eric’s own.
On the surface, Eric and Billy inhabit different worlds. Eric is a deeply spiritual teacher rooted in a small coastal Delaware town. Billy is a celebrated actor and performer whose larger-than-life persona commands stages around the world. But when I ask Eric how the relationship works, he doesn’t hesitate.
“I know that I can be my authentic self with him, and he can be his with me,” he says. “We love each other unconditionally.”
The words could sound rehearsed. Coming from Eric, they don’t.
The red carpets, famous faces, and international travel are not what matter most.
“It’s all about the people,” he explains. “I love Billy’s family and friends, and he loves mine.”
Authenticity surfaces repeatedly in our conversation — not as an abstract ideal, but as Eric’s determination to trust what feels right for him, even when other people may not understand it. I tell him about growing up in Pittsburgh and spending much of my life trying to fit the person I was into the person the world expected me to be. Eric listens intently, then pauses before responding.
“Fuck the system.”
It is blunt, funny, and entirely consistent with the man sitting across from me. Dating Billy may have dramatically increased the number of strangers who have opinions about Eric, but it hasn’t increased the number whose opinions matter to him. He is remarkably unconcerned with what people he doesn’t know think — or say — about him. The attention is new. His response to it is not.
For Eric, authenticity isn’t about asking the world for permission to be yourself. It’s about deciding that permission was never the world’s to give.
That instinct—to look inward rather than outward for permission — predates Billy.
Eric initially turned to yoga for a practical reason: he wanted to improve his physical performance on the soccer field. It didn’t take long for him to realize that something else was happening. Yoga was strengthening his body, but it was also grounding him.
Over time, the physical practice became inseparable from the mental one. The poses, the heat, even the strength required to hold his body in place became less important than learning how to quiet the noise around him, stay present, and listen to himself. The man who had pushed me through an hour of sweat and discomfort wasn’t simply teaching people how to move their bodies. He was asking them to practice something he had learned to do himself.
That sense of being grounded has become particularly important in a relationship that often requires two people to live very different lives. Eric is quick to point out that he and Billy have separate careers, separate ambitions, and goals entirely their own. Neither expects the other to abandon an individual life simply because they have chosen to build a relationship together.
When Billy left for London to star in “Cabaret,” distance became part of their routine. They FaceTimed every day, a practice they continue whenever they are apart.
“I tell Billy everything,” Eric says.
Being authentic with Billy doesn’t require the two men to become more alike. If anything, the opposite seems true. They are comfortable following their own career paths, living separate lives when circumstances require it, and giving each other the freedom to pursue what matters individually. Then they come back together — not because either has put his own life on hold, but because they have chosen to share those lives with each other.
When we finally look at the time, nearly 90 minutes have passed. Eric still needs to pack. New York is waiting, Amsterdam after that, and somewhere there is undoubtedly an itinerary telling Billy exactly where he needs to be and when.
But for a while, neither of us was racing toward the next moment.
We were fully inside the one we were in.
