Connect with us

Books

‘Transparent’ creator shares journey in compelling new memoir

New book works despite sometimes alienating references to privileged life

Published

on

Jill Soloway, gay news, Washington Blade

Author Jill Soloway shares their rocky road to personal acceptance in a new memoir. (Photo courtesy Crown Archtype)

‘She Wants It: Desire, Power, and Toppling the Patriarchy’
 
By Jill Soloway
 
Crown Archtype
 
$27
 
256 pages

Sometimes, coming-out memoirs are so predictable, you can recount them in your sleep. Especially, if show business, queerness and gender are involved.

This isn’t the case with “She Wants It,” the new memoir by Jill Soloway, the Emmy- and Golden Globe Award-winning creator of “Transparent.” Even Hollywood couldn’t have predicted Soloway’s account of personal and professional transformation and the way they’ve turned the complex mosaic of their life into art (Soloway identifies as non-binary and prefers the third-person plural pronoun).

“She Wants It” is an account of coming out, gender shifting and making art. Soloway’s story begins on a Sunday a few years ago. Soloway, then identifying as straight and married to her husband Bruce, is sitting at the kitchen table with their 3-year-old son Felix. Soloway’s father calls and comes out as trans over the phone.

This revelation was a catalyst for Soloway. Before their father came out, Soloway had been successful in show business as a writer and producer for “Six Feet Under,” “United States of Tara” and other TV shows. In the 1990s with their sister Faith, Soloway created “The Real Live Brady Bunch,” a loving spoof of the beloved 1970s show that developed a cult following and ran in Chicago, L.A. and in the Village in New York.

Yet Soloway felt that they’d spent too much time developing empty story ideas and being enmeshed in hetereo relationship drama. 

“So much wasted energy, all of those stories and plots, poofed into the ether, belonging to any man who came through — that’s mostly what I was doing instead of making art,” Soloway writes.

After the shocking Sunday afternoon phone call, Soloway began to get in touch with their body and their creativity, falling in love with a woman, identifying as queer, then, non-binary and creating art.

“Now that I have a queer parent, getting my body in line with my mind was no longer just a flight of fancy,” Soloway writes.

“She Wants It” takes you along on Soloway’s journey from identifying as straight to non-binary to working to create a safe space to make art and to fight for social change. Soloway cuts off her long hair, stops wearing make-up and undergoes breast reduction surgery. Along the way, Soloway lets you in on how intricately art and their life are intertwined.

Soloway, never one to feel relaxed when not working, gets through emotional crises by plunging into work. 

“There was only one way to get through this. … I pulled out my laptop and began working on ‘Transparent,’” Soloway writes, “The script came out so easily, like a slippery baby.”

“Transparent” was based on the author’s family experience of their father coming out as trans. Things became even more meta when Ali, a character on the show based on Jill Soloway, falls in love with Leslie, a professor, based on queer poet Eileen Myles. In a twist stranger than fiction, Soloway meets Myles when they’re on a panel. You guessed it: they fell in love. 

“This is what’s wrong with writing a TV show about people who are all fragments of you,” Soloway writes. “You can never tell what comes first, the fiction or the reality.”

The vibes of gender studies and privilege in “She Wants It” are a bit much. Even if you’re a card-carrying feminist, the name checks of queer, feminist intellectuals and writers from Susan Sontag to Maggie Nelson in this memoir can be tiresome. At times, Soloway’s life seems overstuffed with perks, from having an always-sensitive therapist to going to Paris for Christmas, unattainable by lesser mortals.

Don’t be put off by this. Soloway, who grew up in an upper-middle class family in Chicago, is aware of how privileged their life is. The memoir candidly addresses issues raised when Jeffrey Tambor (a cis man) was cast as Maura in “Transparent” and, later, fired for incidents of sexual harassment. To increase Hollywood’s representation of queer people, people of color and other marginalized groups, Soloway co-founded 50/50 by 2020 Time’s Up’s activist arm.

With the Trump Administration attempting to take away the civil rights of transgender people, it’s easy to despair. “She Wants It” gives you hope that human dignity will prevail.

     

 

Advertisement
FUND LGBTQ JOURNALISM
SIGN UP FOR E-BLAST

Books

Reflect on Pride season with these engaging books

Travel, memoirs, and more on tap for June

Published

on

Books for Pride by various authors
c.2026, various publishers
$18.95 – $29.00

How many times have you marched so far this month? Seems like there’s always a reason to gather and walk during Pride, but save some time for yourself, too. You’ll want to reflect, rest, and read these great books about living your best Pride month. 

No doubt, you’ve thought once or twice about stepping away from society as it is, and moving somewhere more accepting. So read “Qtopia: A Memoir of Love, Land, and Liberation” by Juda Bennett (University of Wisconsin Press, $18.95), the story of doing exactly that, and how it turned out.

Back in the ‘70s, Bennett fled the suburbs and all it represented, and went “back to the land,” to a commune named Lavender Hill. Some of the places he’d lived before then had promised way more than they delivered, but Lavender Hill was different – more rural, more open, more queer, much better. But you know all good things must end, and that includes “queer utopia.” The only thing left was to re-enter the mainstream, a journey unto itself, and one worth reading.

Speaking of memoirs, in “Gay Mormon Dad” by Chad Anderson, art by Remy Burke (Graphic Mundi, $21.99), you’ll read about Anderson’s life as a husband (to a woman), a father, and a man who seemingly had it all but it wasn’t right, and he wasn’t happy. He was gay, but acknowledging it, telling his family and his church family, could mean the loss of everything he loved. It’s a story that may be familiar to you, in some way, and it’s a quick read.

For most of his life, Joseph Osmundson dreamed about getting pregnant and having a family. The former didn’t happen and, as for the latter, as he writes in his memoir, “Spawning Season: An Experiment in Queer Parenthood” (Bloomsbury, $27.99) the journey for a gay man to become a father can have plenty of roadblocks.

When two women approach Osmundson to be a sperm donor, it appears that his ultimate dreams are about to come true. Things go swimmingly – until race enters the conversation. Are the words “donor” and “dad” the same? Read this powerful book, and think about it.

And finally, if parenthood as a gay person is something that’s a case of maybe-later, then “Good Morning Moon: A Snapshot of an American Family” by Brad Gooch (Harper, $29) is a book to find. It’s the story of late-life love, surrogacy, and identity as Gooch learns about himself as he learns to be a good Dad. This is a great book for older fathers, and anyone who’s on the parental fence, later in life.

If these great books aren’t enough for you, or if you’re looking for something different for Pride, then head to your favorite bookstore or library and ask the staff there to help you find your next best read. They’ve got a lot of books to put in your hands, a lot of sunny afternoons full of relaxing and promise, so march on out, get a new book, and happy Pride!

Continue Reading

Books

David Archuleta on Mormon faith, ‘Idol,’ more in new book

Unique memoir details religious upbringing, coming out

Published

on

(Book cover image courtesy of Gallery Books)

‘Devout: Losing My Faith to Find Myself’
By David Archuleta
c.2026, Gallery Books
$29/290 pages

So just make up your mind already.

The decision is very much in your control – or, at least that’s how it’s supposed to be. It’ll be your future, your path, and seizing it may not just be necessary, but mandatory. It’s your life, and no one can live it for you. As in the new memoir “Devout” by David Archuleta, that goes for career and for love, too.

Born to parents who both had musical careers before they wed, David Archuleta remembers an early childhood growing up in a Hispanic Mormon community in Florida, where kin was always nearby. He was six when his parents moved the immediate family to Utah; the first thing he remembers about that is the snow, and how it was so cold, it burned.

Because music was in his blood, Archuleta grew up singing and dancing, often with his mother whom he calls “my rock.” It was his father, however, who encouraged him to perform; first, with a gentle push, then a shove toward a career Archuleta didn’t really want.

But he did want to make his father happy, so he went along with the contests, embarrassing meet-and-greets with stars, and uncomfortable introductions. Slowly, though, performing became more fun, and Archuleta made friends.

Meanwhile, back home, everything was breaking apart. A “family friend” whom Archuleta refuses to name accused his father of abuse. He was exonerated, but it affected the family’s closeness and they stopped being affectionate.

That was a painful backdrop to Archuleta’s soaring career, his appearances on Star Search, friendships with other rising stars, his runner-up spot on “American Idol,” tours, and recording contracts. His father kept pushing him.

But there was one thing missing.

Since he was a boy, Archuleta had known that he was attracted to men, but his Mormon faith taught him that that was unacceptable. Kissing, his abuelita said, was wrong. He tried hard to date girls, in the most chaste way. Anything past that was against God – and anything at all with a man was unthinkable.

Though it absolutely favors his personal life and dwells on it a bit too much, “Devout” strikes an otherwise nice balance between that, author David Archuleta’s career, his sexuality, and his faith. The latter two are loaded with controversy.

You don’t need to be Mormon to fully understand the faith part; Archuleta offers non-Mormons a brief education, so readers can see the importance of the Church’s teachings in his life and why he felt the need to abandon it as his understanding of his bisexuality grew. It’s emotionally raw and honest, but also so respectful that it almost bears re-reading. Such candor and the heart-on-his-sleeve tone you’ll sense are features in the entire book, alongside Archuleta’s family’s struggles and his learning to strike out alone.

It’s harmonious in more ways than one, and fans will be happy.

So, too, will anyone who wants a unique memoir with a dose of faith, or someone who’s an “American Idol”watcher. Find “Devout” and be sure to share. You won’t mind.

The Blade may receive commissions from qualifying purchases made via this post.

Continue Reading

Books

‘Mighty Real’ explores history of LGBTQ music

From Judas Priest to Whitney, something for every taste

Published

on

(Book cover image courtesy of Viking)

‘Mighty Real: A History of LGBTQ Music, 1969-2000’
By Barry Walters
c.2026, Viking
$35/496 pages

Step, step, tap, back step.

Shimmy in a circle, left hand waving over your head, shake your tail feathers, repeat to the beat. Once there was a time when you could do any dance in your sleep, but it’s been a while. So read “Mighty Real” by Barry Walters, and see if your toes don’t tap.

Fifty-seven years after Stonewall, and here we are: LGBTQ musicians still face scrutiny for their sexuality because, says Walters, music isn’t created for gay listeners. No problem: LGBTQ artists and writers have often penned lyrics carefully in order to say what can’t be said, “coding” songs for gay audiences that straight (and ignorant) listeners can dance to and enjoy with apparent obliviousness.

Walters offers “just a few” examples.

Lou Reed sang about trans people in the late ‘60s and offered a rallying song for the Gay Liberation Front in 1972, the latter of which felt like a message to a then-11-year-old Walters. Janis Joplin claimed she was straight, but she had several girlfriends. Motown singers often offered sometimes-ambiguous lyrics.

John Lennon’s hand placement on the back cover of Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band made Walters begin to understand that he was different from other boys.

David Bowie is on his list, of course, as is Bette Midler, Elton John, Donna Summer, and Queen. You’ll find Judas Priest here, Green Day, and punk music. The Village People are included in this book, also Grace Jones, Duran Duran, and Cher, Whitney, Melissa, Latifah, and the lyrics from several blockbuster movies.

Two of Prince’s band members were lesbians, and they heavily influenced his albums. Diana Ross’s “I’m Coming Out” cemented her position in LGBTQ culture, and Michael Jackson’s inclusion here takes much careful consideration.

Read about Olivia Newton-John and the B52s. And then there’s Sylvester, for whom Walters has a soft spot in his heart. Sylvester’s death still makes Walters cry.

In his preface, author and music writer Barry Walters points out that music is what you make it and that it’s interpreted differently by each individual. To that end, this book naturally consists of preferential history and personal opinions about singers, bands, albums, and songs.

Agree or disagree. That’s where much of the appeal lies in “Mighty Real.”

Here, Walters wraps his memories around his choices, giving readers room for their own views, memories, and list making. Music-loving readers might also be surprised to note who’s not on Walters’ list – there aren’t many country performers here, for example, and the overall list focuses entirely on music from roughly 1968 to the year 2000, mostly on the kinds of songs you’ll want at the club or party. Again, discuss, and curate your own playlist.

This is a hefty book, but the chapters are browse-able and generally short enough to read in under five minutes. It’s nostalgic, yet also serious in the history it presents. This is the kind of book you want to leave near your album collection, or wherever you get your tunes. But finding “Mighty Real” is your first step.

The Blade may receive commissions from qualifying purchases made via this post.

Continue Reading

Popular